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Savannah Feb 2018
I hate that you did this to me

You're a venomous pain to my mind
Tearing me apart from the inside

Making wish I could rip out my gut
To erase the hurt that comes with each passing thought of us

I would do anything for a relief
Even suffer a different fate from the one you forced me to face when you decided to leave

Never come back, I just want to forget that you ever existed
Even though that will never happen because the emptiness you left me with is relentless
3/23/17

Thanks for reading
You have a million ways to leave me.
took all of them
your cellphone beside me
lovers away from me
in the distance you can't be touched
blaming of your mental illness
admitting you don't love me, silently.

were late on our anniversary, from ******* his ****,
it's not that I mind, it just measures your respect of me.
I'm not surprised when you can't touch me after
or look in my eyes

everything you do, is fine.
you only do what you want.
I am so lucky, for any time at all
for three days in a hotel room
for three days I wait, for you to look at me.
screaming at a window.

we wont admit the window is only when we look at each other.
when our backs turn, it's roses
isn't it funny.
a million miles between us, content with our illusions
two key cards, the truth too loud to sleep.
buzzing static in the space between our chests.
I want so badly to touch it
flies part when I swat.

You used to moan when I kissed your ear
your muscles tense
I stop kissing your ear
you used to blush when I would stare at your body
you change in the dark.
I stop staring, where you can see me.

I witness your new lovers
you tell me they force your head down, how you liked it.
if I tried that, the amount of guilty in me would tear me out of my body.
you would stay silent and guilty, I won't touch you
I am the one man who wont touch you
I am the one man you won't let touch you.
his pregnant wife moved out of his house
you would raise his baby, you say.
I cry through desperation
You ask if I regret my decision
through tears, deep silence
I say I am proud of you.

I am proud of you.
I know the love
the hope you feel.
it's not my place to stop it
only show you how it burned
Do I regret it?
it was the most wonderful love I could imagine
I'm not saying it will hurt "except the good parts"
I am saying it will hurt
Especially the good parts.
there is much to gain, in losing your childhood.
Please, don't stay a child.

it isn't fair to compare you to her.
you chose her favorite color
your new lover calls you the name of my unborn daughter
I can't stop it, but I cry sometimes.
you sound like her
the body language in your "****"'s.
did you know she hated drinking? until she could not stop.
I convinced her to take the first sip,
when you drink ***** I cringe.
she left her daughter for heroine.
when you tell me you want to feel numb, I worry for the baby you are leaving behind
as you foregeo your childhood

his pregnant wife left him because of you,
he hates children
you are 19.
he is 38.
yet he says he loves you, with his snake tongue
I have seen your body
I know it's siren call.

You are not a monster,
or safe in this skin you hate.
around me.

We are still in love.
you haven't left me.
I've been twisted by this vacancy sign in your lawn
I'm going to die on this memory of you raising the family I wanted.
You are some new version of yourself, in the same beautiful skin.
your limp old body draped over a children's empty bed frame
I am such a monster, I would **** it.
Just to be inside of something familiar.

while I sleep next to you in this hotel room.
you are wearing jeans.
my engagement ring.
and his cologne.
Francie Lynch Jun 2017
I'm taunted by another,
Allured by the attention,
Polishing vanity to a reflective glaze,
Like a winner's cup, held up by the ears,
To display, kiss, and smudge,
Then returned to the rightful owner.
It's an enviable snare,
One may think is sincere,
From here, looking over there.
Notes
Cerasium Jun 2017
My life was empty and uneventful.
Then you walk right into my heart.
The world turned to color.
And I rose out of my rut.

My life turned happy.
Though I could not believe it.
My heart grew to love.
And to why I'll never know.

You came to me when my heart ached.
Patched it up and made it new.
You loved me for the way it looked.
But how do I know you truly do.

My heart starts to ache watching these things.
Things that appear to prove you don't.
My breathing fastens as my heart beats.
How do I ask you about this?

I wonder painfully about the thoughts.
That keep poking into my heart.
I ask myself the question that I fear.
Is he really doing this or not?
Nicole Bataclan Mar 2017
Half a life
Half a love
Undivided submission;

Half-hearted
I am utterly devoted
To lesser moments.

Between the sheets
The mind drifts
In search of atonement;

Part-time wrong
Entirely yours
An inevitable outcome.

It is living half a life
Accepting half love
Full-time;

My light,
Take me out of the dark

The courage within to say goodbye.
How many beautiful girls does it take to **** a man?
Just one.
Just one heartbreak.
Just one lie.
Just one night.
Just one look.
Just one touch.
Just one hug.
Just one kiss.
Just one love.
Just one heart.
Just one soul.
Just one girl.
Just one.
Francie Lynch Mar 2017
Hawthorn hedgerows separated their fields.
Alice often found Towser lapping
From Jim's cupped hand,
At his hill well.
Her brothers fished Jim's salmon-rich creek.
To get her animal she walked through the bushes,
Drank his water.
They decided to wed.
He poured a new kitchen floor;
Chickens and sows,
Sons and daughters arrived,
Through famine and taxes
They prospered, survived.

Over the evening pint,
The lads grumbled about the Travellers
Camped off the road to Jim's.
     They're gypsies, spilled Jim,
     No different than him, pointing to Frank, beneath a tin:
                                   Guinness is good for you.
     I passed them at tea, they were eating my fish.
     I nodded Okay, and they sang, "Make a wish!
"

How comes it to pass,
Is anyone's guess.

Jim left walking for home,
A dark journey, alone.
The night sky was clear,
Jim loved the fresh air.
In his line he saw
The gypsy's red fire.
He was offered a drink,
Being a purveyor of craic,
The stars glided eastward,
Alice watched them that night,
Waiting for Jim to come back.

He rose with a scratch,
And a Guiness-stained yawn,
And the smell of a smokey,
Fire-haired woman.

For seventeen years no words were spoken,
Alice was redolent,
The holy of holies lay open,
The body's been stolen.
In the stillness of night,
Alone in her bed,
Jim lay beside her;
Her man was dead.

One fish, one wish,
And all was unsaid,
An unspeakable silence
Envelope the dead.

A wish is a fish,
Alive in deep water;
If you hook it, release it,
It'll swim to another.

Jim died alone
In his house, not his home;
His wish transpired
By fish and his fire.
ALYA Feb 2017
In a world amongst the untrue, the wrongful, the two-faced; pseudo reality is taunting at humankind insolently.

To have faith, to be hopeful, to believe; only for them to trash and scatter what you've been believing in.

The betrayed, the deceived, the deceitful; carelessly and mercilessly succumbed upon their sins. Arrogantly looming upon all, unknowing and forgetful of those who sang prayers at dawn for them.

The smiles, the tears, the two-faced; o' the mighty entities everyone praised, not even Judas would have the nerve. It's a shame humankind is a fool; easily played and toyed with.

The denial, the anger, the bargaining, the depression, the acceptance; five stages of grief that I learned, only to know that I could never master.

The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. The body is hollow, for the soul is in sorrow.
Why?
Tamal Kundu Jan 2017
Distilled sun invades
to project on whitewashed screen their
chintzy-hotel love,
melding the serenading shades.
Form: Verse
Jessica Dec 2016
Forgive me it's been too long since I've seen the face of another man.
Kissed new lips or held foreign hands.
I can feel your heart racing, I think mines stopped completely.  
Fight or flight tells me to run, or fall for you so deeply.
You hold my face, stare hard into my panicked eyes and tell me to relax.
Not two hours ago I was leaving my home, bags packed.
My mind races with thoughts out of my control.
I'm overwhelmed, drowning as my kiddie pool of emotion reaches an overflow.
Throat tightens, breathing quickens, I open my mouth wide to cry out.
He holds me close, stroking my hair, he tells me he'll show me what "real love is about".
Do I leave and tell him goodnight?
Do I surrender myself to him and feel unknown delights?
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