To have done something, have you learned anything
other than the fact that it could be done and it could
be done by you; the next day do you tell everyone,
do you expect deference or do you quietly wonder
about the need for accomplishment without insight;
what if they carried you off, joyously praising you for
something that made them happy though it did not
change their lives; would it mean so much to you to
have changed their feelings for a moment so deeply
that they would remember it forever even though
it was not enough to enable a child to be fed by it’s
mother who cannot pay the rent on time; would you
rationalize the use of a tool that had no morality or
virtue except the blankness needed to achieve the
result so desired by those who cannot achieve it
on their own; or maybe a body so desirable that
you cannot hear a word she says because what is
that compared to the fantasy that you have built
around her face; it is only a matter of knowing why
you live and beyond the crashing times of your life
what you would do that could make time meaningful;
can you make up your mind to share these things
with me; can you make up your mind to waste time
while we create feelings that only the hand of another
can summon from within; can you tell me how you
feel without fear of the retribution of honesty that
someone who only exists not to learn but to consume
would deliver; no matter the day or the time, you do
not know if it is the beginning or the end, only that
the next decision you make could be the one that
changes your life if only you can discern between
growth and mere existence

The expanse of sand in the desert
Like mortar between bricks
Except the bricks are the people
Desolate but vital
The evolution of understanding
But for a man whose life changed without warning
It is the distance between meaning
And existence that is now most clear to him
Within every grain of sand is a reminder
Of a happier time
When sleep was meant for rejuvenation
And not for despairing
When a new day was for happiness
And not desperation
There is no turning back as every direction is now the same
The crossing is only about movement
For lessons have already been learned
It is now a time for steel to be bent
For our nature is always the same
And if we must live with it then we must suffer because of it
But would you wait to feel the peace you have now
Would you wait until it is gone
For the relief you would feel is upon you
It is inside you
Now
Enough to dance upon the roof of a car
Or quietly read with your child
Sweet relief
Sweet blessings
Unless you must cross the expanse to find it again
And while you remember that you once had it
It will not be until you walk on glass
Glass that does not cut but instead marks time
From here to there
Sand that becomes a liquid
Liquid that becomes glass
Glass that reflects the past
And reveals the future
And upon it you must walk
And through it you must pass
Until the time comes that your nature has changed
And your own forgiveness has been accepted
By you

What is most important to think about?
A singer sang, “War is not the answer”
A God said, “Blessed are the peacemakers”
Still we weep for words that cannot save a soldier

We are beautiful but fear we never walk without
A man said, “Our daughters gave us flowers!”
A God said, “No man will know the hour”
Still we weep while our wrongs remain in power

What consequence for me
What consequence for you
Yes freedom lives in the hearts of men
But is it for me
Is it for you
Or those deciding the time to strike again

We are a memory of sin walking without doubt
A child cried, “When will I see my father?”
A God said, “Render that which is Caesars”
Still we weep upon a flag burying our sons forever

What consequence for me
What consequence for you
Yes freedom lives in the hearts of slaves
And it is for them
As it is for all men
And those knowing the time to strike again

Is the way it turned out meant to be?
I don’t have a choice for my past
We needed something to happen
The love was not lost upon us
But our prayers still need an answer

You were gone before I could decide
You said it was time to walk another way
Your tears told me the truth
It wasn’t our hearts that could say goodbye
Just a life that needed more than waiting

I once told her she was too crazy for me
She said that’s how it works
Being nowhere but in each other’s arms
That’s what it was for too long
The drinks were what kept us afloat

I don’t want to live for another day
I’m learning how to ignore time
It’s too easy to borrow
You might have known this all along
I only know that day never came home

We were both impressed enough
At least our eyes were saying so
I asked her where she was going
For some reason she didn’t know

I wonder what you are really like
Is there any faith in what you know
I wonder if you are even aware
You went the wrong way long ago

You have no idea
No idea if you're gonna stay
And I'm so weird
You're gonna walk away

She tried to be everything that’s good
It makes it hard to face the truth
It’s easier to say I forgive you all the time
And only think about the games of youth

I noticed she was still looking at me
She had no idea how my mind just exploded
The entire thought was like a shot of whiskey
It went down hard but now my heart is loaded

You have no idea
No idea if you're gonna stay
But I know
You're gonna walk away

It is our consciousness that lives alone
That is why I stare into your eyes
I wonder about you and if you are the same as I
Beyond our chanting
And our place between Kings and beggars

Is my mission to avoid death
Or just the mere thought of it

So I begin where delusion has led me to a new world
And yet I do not risk my life
I am no mariner crossing vast oceans
That would be remind me too much of death
And yet acquiring breadfruit is enough to circumnavigate my fate

The pleasantness of why we are here is the story we write
Our purpose must be believed
Whether we find it or not
What is good and evil are equal in the sight of a mortal man
He cannot conquer one or the other
He can only hope to find solace and joy in humility
In the building of a home
Or the love of a child
For honor beyond that only becomes tinder for his own glory

Am I so far evolved from lions
Dignity
Strength
Courage
Unquestioned worth
I see it in their pride
I am only able to reason the things they do not care to ponder

But there was a man
His greatness unquestioned
He was unafraid to die
So much that he risked his life everyday
Each new day a blessing
A chance to save mankind
To remind them that the path is peace
Not power
Every bone was broken
But not his soul
That was their mistake
For every blow sounded the drum
And God heard it well
And though the dove could not find him
Still he knew
In him he was well pleased

There were many men
But so too were there women
Waiting for freedom
Waiting in line
For the men came first
And they admired them
They knew who must accept the blows
And though they lived apart
A warrior loves unconditionally
And she knew he would die for her
As he would die for his people
It was enough to know these things

That is how they lived

That is how they lived

That is how they lived

That is how they lived

In mourning always
They knew they were part of a funeral procession
They took turns as pall bearers for their past
They learned to laugh with honor
And cry long enough to live again
For as no storm lives forever
No heart can be broken that is willing to heal itself

If only I knew how

The way it’s rainin’
It’s just like forgettin’
Pain that lasted a lifetime
Because it was swept away by your love

The way it’s rainin’
It’s just like rememberin’
Love still works
When you decide to let it in

It’s rainin’
Like never before
Summer can wait
For as long as it takes
For the rain
To bring you to my door

An old creek bed still knows what to do
You just have to give it what it needs
You can let your heart dry up
Or let it rain and see where it leads

It’s rainin’
Like never before
Summer can wait
For as long as it takes
For the rain
To bring you to my door

The way it’s rainin’
It’s just like livin’
In her garden
With flowers she planted long ago

I am America
Conqueror
Conquered
Indentured
Old world roots
New world trees

I am America
To overcome
To transform
To dream
To live
To die

I am America
Native
Black
Brown
White
Mulatto

I am America
Soldier
Protestor
Fire
Healer
Flower

I am America
Christian
Jew
Muslim
Agnostic
Atheist

I am America
Master
Slave
Rich
Poor
Divided

I am America
Capitalist
Socialist
Environmentalist
Activist
Survivalis­t

I am America
Weak
Strong
Freedom
Dysfunction
Uncertain

I am America
Diverse
Tolerant
Racist
Hate
Love

I am America
So it is written
Natural born
Inalienable rights
Created equal
I am you

So what are we doing, falling in love?
I feel the chains of my life fading away
I never knew another heart’s calling
Could ever draw me near this way

I only told you one time how I felt
There’s no expectation, no game to play
I wanted you to know, there was love
Walking around your life, ready to say

I’m not worried about telling you these things
It’s not easy hearing such a surprise today
You never thought it, life had already chosen
I didn’t expect you to follow as I walked away

Your dream paradise can wake up now
Between the time you laugh and pray
The spirit that we hold with both hands
Is more than just a glimpse of love today

I am not a tourist
I will not be opportunistic
And I bring no camera too
Only a mind that will remember

I am not a tourist
I will not be dogmatic
And I bring no point of view
Only the will to discover

I am not a tourist
I will not be imperialistic
And I bring no statue
Only the humility of a pauper

I am not a tourist
I will not be materialistic
And I bring no Western virtue
Only the repentance of sinner

He has a wife
And three children
And he joined the army
But there is no such thing as toy soldiers

He became everything they wanted him to be
A soldier
A warrior
Able to pull the trigger
But today he pulled the wrong one
The one that was for him
And him only

He wasn't following orders
Just his own
A mind is a terrible thing to waste
And his was wasted

It was time to ****
Non-believers
Sixteen people who don't believe
Not in Jesus anyway
Well they do
Sort of
But not like they believe in Mohammed

That's right
He shot them
Now everyone's mad

"Why?
Because everyone is dead!
Just dead!
I killed them!
That's what ******' happens!
Why are you surprised?"

They dropped an atomic bomb once
He got a medal

I thought it was always the right measure
I’d notice how they had everything one could invent
It was as if an artist had drawn their pedigree
Yet it was darkness that the sun eclipsed
The life they lived was picked clean by the false messages they sent
To wake up to this realization was to know there was nothing left to find

I’ve learned that a place-setting once was life itself
When the news traveled slowly the time was spent on finer things
Now we quarrel and abandon the soft edges
But you must know that a pillow exists in my heart
Where you may lay your head close to whisper of the birds of spring
The walls still stand strong all around paying my reticence no mind

I’m sure you will be alright either way
I have not heard of any true calamity in my absence
And though I could never deny
That I’m as common as a yellow can on the shelf
And that I’ve never once felt that nerves immobilized you in my presence
I’m filled enough with life to strike fear into the silence I might leave behind

Indifference is not an act of desperation
To allow time to pass swiftly by without so much as a wave
Is to trust that fate loves as much as I do
And the wind I feel upon my face is upon yours as well
Let us find ourselves my love as it is sanity that we must first save
For I cannot take your hand without first knowing if you are my kind

You told the old man he didn’t have a young mind
That whatever he once knew he could never find
And even if he did it didn’t matter to a new generation
They know better because they thrive on his indignation

What kind of clown would mock someone so helpless
He can’t prove himself anymore so you call him useless
It was early one day when you decided to be that way
Something happened so now you mock people who pray

The world has become yours just because of your youth
But that doesn’t have anything to do with the truth
I wonder how much you can learn if you reject the past
You’ve had too many wasted mornings that will never last

The bravery of the spoken word matches the fear you create
The easiest thing is to know which side you should hate
Or maybe that’s the hardest until tomorrow comes to save
Either way you can decide then if you were a afraid or brave

The forces that bear upon a man’s life are felt only by him
You can’t take the time to know when you are driven by whim
The activist mind is uncompromising as a wave before it crashes
It may be your greatest love but it leaves nothing not even ashes

There are so many things to be aware of but why are you so sure
To bury an old man as if his life meant nothing that he could cure
To not know how his children loved him even as they grew old
Is to say all you know is all there is in a world who’s story you told

Side mirror lament
Blinking back the past again
Red bandana tears

I watched her image
I wondered as she talked on the phone
How old must a woman be
To want to live alone?

Forgotten wander
Thoughts that became some other
Another blank page

There are no buttons to push
I am not someone to read
My emotions are not random
But you will never know my need

Rush inspiration
Ego-infested display
Compromised poem

In the yearning for respect
Creation becomes a means to an end
The irony emerges
In thoughts I cannot defend

Watching my children
Oblivious to discord
Reaching for Daddy

In spite of all the hate
I have become nostalgic
They are happy
Leaving worked its magic

Hard work is a gift
For yourself every day
Slumber not want not*

It’s what I do
It’s not greed
It’s all for them
That is why I bleed

How I walk
How I walk
Believe in faith
Believe in fear
Will the fields guide me
Will the forest shelter me
If I walk in faith

Where I walk
Where I walk
Closer to the land
Closer to the sea
I won’t lose myself
I won’t lose my children
If I walk in faith

Walk in faith
Walk in faith
When it is cold
When it is hard
Come to me
Come to me
I believe in you
Believe in me

How I live
How I live
The way I was taught
The way I was loved
My life may change
My past will not
If I walk in faith

How I love
How I love
My neighbor
My savior
Will I know them
Will I know you
If I walk in faith

Walk in faith
Walk in faith
When it is cold
When it is hard
Come to me
Come to me
I believe in you
Believe in me

The dead have been spoken for
But who will remember?
The living must speak for themselves
Will it be violent or tender?

The unborn risk their lives by our choice
In silence they wait
While our minds, a legacy of failure
Play God with their fate

What would make me finally act my age
When youth smiles not upon the wise
Is it to speak to young women without remorse
Or become the stranger who empathized

The shallow lightening flash of narcissism
Strikes close to our children
Which images will they choose for their life
Pleasure or to fight explosions inside the gates of heaven?

I think this is my question
Was that really for me?
Your smile has scattered my mind
Like children at the end of a school day

Screaming and yelling recklessly
Running away from tedium
With no thought to anything
But the happiness they will spend

And when you laugh
Birds of a different feather
Gather with no thought of difference
But with hope for your call

As do I
Or is it just who you are?
A girl with a smile for a stranger
Because life is about what you give

And as we part
Has time ever stopped
As when two arms extended
With finger tips touching
In the instant
Of a lifetime
That will forever be remembered
And cherished
More than the love making
Because in the sorrow of parting
The longing in our eyes
Is felt deeper
Than any touch
Or embrace
Or memory
For the moment
That I step out the window
Before gravity
Before reality
I fly
And live
As never before
And never again

It's just down there
Underneath it all
Not getting much notice
Feeling pretty small

It wears itself well
Holding under the strain
Looking for a bit of polish
Trying to avoid the rain

Living in a closet
Crowded, lonely and dark
Hoping to be picked today
Maybe for a walk in the park

It doesn't know its worth
It thinks it's just a shoe
But it protects every little step
On my journey to you

i do not feel any darkness inside of me,
only the sheerness of the oppression of the ages,
raining down from atomic skies;
along with the fears of so many who cannot see;
as ignorance draws not from the well of freedom,
nor listens to the wisdom of sages,
but instead courts the fascism of seductive lies

I'm not sitting on the fence
I just want to love the world
That's all I want to be
A beautiful dreamer
That's good enough for me

I'm not sitting on the fence
I'm over here locking the gate
Can't you read jack?
The sign says no trespassing
You don't live here go on back

I'm not sitting on the fence
I knocked it down the other day
All the animals left the farm
The rooster stayed anyway
Opinions don't do him no harm

I'm not sitting on the fence
I haven't changed my mind in years
I decided I know everything
You want to argue go right ahead
I hear a bell you can't un-ring

I'm not sitting on the fence
I'm not gonna listen
I'm smarter than you
You want an insult?
Just try to tell me what's true

I'm not sitting on the fence
I know what I like
Take your time to decide
I know why you're leaning on it
The barbs are sharp on either side

No instrument could torture
More than memories of their room
He cursed all thought
Under blankets that once held her
Because they had violently fought
Within the darkness of his gloom

No half pint would do
For a man who talks to himself
“I know!” he yelled
“Don’t tell me what is true
It was by my hand she was felled
Her love didn’t die by itself”

“I can’t really sing”
Said the sad man sadly
“But if only I could (!)
Words that ring
From instruments of wood
Would always love her madly!”

The staggering symphony
Sounds that mocked romance
He wept hoping the morning dew
Would awaken her sympathy
But the answer he already knew
Her heart had given it's last chance

What storms exist in a beautiful mind,
   never to pass us by?

Drawing the sun from looming shadows
To separate what is to be known in time
Portioned among swirling ridges of worry
By horizons that never forget to remind

He found the way was not the winds,
   but to walk within the eye

Drawing the calm from looming concerns
To separate might be from once was
Portioned among flower beds to be saved
By those who decided to live just because

Which doors did he lock, trapping forever,
   the Furies that make him cry?

Drawing the good from looming terror
To separate his soul from flesh that breeds
Portioned among those who have not given up
By those who are willing to plant new seeds

Which door remains open within his heart,
   knowing not to ask God why?

Drawing reason from random acts of evil
To separate destiny from forgotten lives
Portioned among those with the will to live
By those who carry on after silent goodbyes

So today is the day
You thought about being old
Your prayers suddenly became real
You saw your Dad in the backseat of a car
Until you remembered he’s no longer there

My eyes were closed
But I was still awake
I saw only grey until a small hole appeared
Inside were tiny pink flowers on a window sill
Now I’m wondering what they were doing there

It’s come down to this
Everything is a sign
It’s not so much about enjoying myself anymore
I wanted to ask someone whose been here before
So I dug a hole just to see if anyone was there

Doing yourself a serious favor
Is trying not to think so much
The answers are the usual questions
I’m not dying young but which way is the door
I drove off I but gave money to a man over there

I thought I knew her limits
I’d never been that afraid of a woman
But she was just as afraid of losing me
I should have known why she shattered the glass

It was what separated us
The things I once said
While we laid in bed
Promises to make you stay

I thought she would never do it
I’d never seen a woman that hard before
But love was something she knew too much about
I should have known desperation has two lives

It was what separated us
The things I once said
While we laid in bed
Promises that pushed you away

I thought she’d miss our life
I'd never seen a woman that happy
But her crooked smile said you don’t have all of me
I should have known what she was saving

It was what separated us
The things I once said
While we laid in bed
Promises that make me pray

Your body walks on sand
But where is your mind?
Your smile in another land
What did you hope to find?

The ocean pulling you in
Cold swells tickle your feet
You think of where you've been
Who were you hoping to meet?

Your eyes glistening like pearls
The moon, startled by your beauty
Forgets to make its tidal swirls
Is someone waiting in the city?

Wading into the darkness
Realizing your place
Reaching for an unseen answer
What will it replace?

Is paradise real?
Yes, if only for a moment
From unhappiness it must steal
Are you someone’s ornament?

Soon you will leave
Flying on sweet wistfulness
There is no need to grieve
Beyond the clouds, togetherness

Each note a life
Together a story
Apart a moment
Sufferings glory
Self absorbed
Unable to blend
Yet in common
Pain with no end
There is no brush
Only the point
Sorrows life
Dignity to anoint
Unmistakable feeling
Hidden no longer
Shared reality
Making us stronger
Eyes closed
Memories near
Our desperation
Emotional fear
Anothers world
Becomes our own
And ours his
Tears on loan...

She wants to be good
And eternal life
We must not forget about that
So she prays
And preaches
And gives witness
And tempts the Lord
With her faith

It’s so far beyond my capacity to reason
Or maybe it's beneath it

That kind of belief
Cannot be discussed
In present company
I’ve never felt such unworthiness
And the need to reject
All at the same time

Does something terrible have to happen
For me to believe in this manner?
It’s not a matter of humbling myself
For God (if he’s up there) knows my limitations
I’m not fooling anyone
I know this
I really do

So why am I drawn to cemeteries
And crosses
But not to people?
It seems only the dead interest me
Maybe it’s because only they know

The butterfly and the swan, our
most blessed creatures; for in
natural painful transformation of
crawler to beautiful freedom, of
ugly homeliness to majestic beauty;
what is natural becomes possible and
what is possible becomes hopeful

Upon stormy waters he walked;
but only still waters draw us near
with melancholy determination;
hearing that voice within, but
does it direct you to throw stones
for ripples that soothe or to break
apart the reflective image of what
you cannot understand?

We are anesthetized; for reality
is no basis for happiness and
delusion fuels pretension to be
what we are not; and so we applaud,
loudly, for strangers who wear our
colors; because what they do is
our greatness; but do we cheer
for them or ourselves?

To those who sacrifice, it is a
constant; to those who do not,
it is a moment; but we live with
our fears no matter who dies
for them; fear because of our
children; fear because of war;
fear because of pride; fear
because of ignorance

What was once a child’s kingdom,
narcissism versus intellect, is how
adults now separate themselves;
the victory of a beautiful face over
character is complete; mannequins
who cannot speak enable those
without conscience to ignore the
consciousness of their soul

Silent love, quiet discomfort,
one human becoming God, for
their blessing is salvation on earth;
but blessings are relative; relative
to where we were born and who
loved us as children; we begin without
the knowing of favor; what we learn
of ourselves is where we begin again

Art is not competition but expression
reveals life; revelation of consciousness;
our heroes must only make us feel; we
ignore their flaws but does that prove
we are forgiving or only want vicarious
pleasure no matter the cost or the
rationalization of the conditions of victory?

The fisher of men’s souls spoke to all
men; for it was written from a mount; but
what do we embrace? War or peace?
Riches or charity? Arrogance or humility?
When ripples reach the far shore what is left
is the question that wet living glass asks
about what we see and what we believe;
because calm reflection is the only storm
we can survive

I can only pray for time to stop and smoke a cigarette

She is living in a time of peace;
a happy mind unknowing of
the Valkyrie deciding which
solider will live and which will
die while the smoke takes
pictures of the stench of death

What is left of my madness when her face can only smile?

Is she beyond the sound of  
Vishnu, “I am become death,”
knowing he was a man trained
to **** without remorse because
morality has become suspended
in the name of expediency

Would she be forced to roast marshmallows on a flaming tree line?

When the time is right; gasoline,
victory; when would her mind be
destroyed by information that did
not come from her father; he never
knew when to tell her what waited
along river banks lined with spears

Will she know nihilism until the resurrection is how man lives?

Who plays a game?
Who learns to speak French enough to drink their wine
To make a life for their children
Is it enough while others resist?

Just a mile from freedom town
The men all gathered there
They weren’t going to stand down
No flag could block the glare

They said it was time to defend
The words they read were near
They didn’t live to play pretend
Their beliefs stronger than fear

It became clear
Crazy was doing nothing
But doing things you don’t want to do
Is like being a ******* in the middle of a war
Or sacrificing a life for people who won’t know the difference

Turn off the radio
The news isn’t good
A soldier who’s seen death
Is always ready to stand up
He’s fears not for his last breath
Does he live in your neighborhood?

Who plays a game?
Who learns to pray every day walking under an umbrella
Fear instead of faith
Is it enough just to exist?

Just a mile from Crows ridge
The people all gathered there
They weren’t afraid to cross the bridge
This time it was their turn to dare

They said it is our time now
The dream was finally near
Still they burn inside the vow
Fifty years gone without fear

It became clear
Slavery was doing nothing
But doing what you have to do
Is never losing again in your own home
When the past remains a part of your resistance

Turn up the radio
The song says you should
A singer tired of death
Is always ready to stand up
He cries in between each breath
If I were him I wonder if I would

On the wings of a dream
You floated
In the search for meaning
You remained devoted
While fulfilling your aim
You thought of me
I possessed the cross of faith
And now have a star and a rosary
A presence sight unseen
You are my friend’s mother
But you reached out to me
And touched me as no other
From Ishmael and Isaac
And a belief in Allah
You brought me to Abraham
And braided God’s Aria
The message to each of us
Of which we alone shall hear
Where once was confusion
I sense clarity is near
I pray for you now
As I did in the past
Your gifts I will always cherish
And will keep until the last

I saw everything my love
But there was no revelation
Because I already knew

Our last supper together
Was not one to remember
Except that I do remember

It never felt that way before
Though we were able to smile
Our memory traveled far

The truth was no comfort
A lie made it easier to bear
There was always another day

I walked to an empty table
Only my glass would follow
Your strength became my thirst

But I wondered about you
Allure made men weak
Was desire all that you were?

I thought of the distance
Like traveling across the sea
I asked if it was the same for you

But I was talking to bare walls
Everything I painted was gone
You were looking for a different brush

I watched you laugh
Your friends made you forget
Though I held your hand

You were once an ornament
I loved that about you
But now what?

Even though I knew you
I felt very strange
You didn’t need me

When you lose the love
The love they felt for you
Then you understand why

I don’t want to learn to live without loving you
Maybe there will come a day when I forget
But that’s not a day I want to regret

I can’t make it happen all the time
I can’t be involved with anyone on stage with me
I need somebody who doesn’t know who I am

Don’t worry about how they look at me
I see it too but waiting is all that seems to matter
It’s my past but do you know how to be tomorrow?

Until I touch you again I can only tell you how it feels
A half full bathtub is how I seem to live
Drowning, breathing, clean, *****… it’s my mind you know?

I’m going to do it; I’m going to make you think about love
But it’s not how it makes you lonely without it
It’s about how it’s not comfortable and how you forgot that

I’m going to draw you in with small talk
Then before I stop the storm will blow the swings from the set
We're not playing the game we played before my love

I thought about growing up
Then I remembered
I did that a couple of weeks ago
So now what
I watched my old self
It was a wild girl
I once knew how to handle her
Now I just wanted to raise her
It all seemed so pointless
Getting wasted
Talking about seeing you on the other side
Now I think about slamming doors
I want to tell my neighbor how to change his life
To quietly close a door is power
It is control over the air around you
Because you begin to glide
But I don’t think he can do it
Don’t get me wrong
That wild girl looked so good
You never grow out of that
The problem is she wants conversation
And fun
You have to chase her all night
Who has time for that?
While I was thinking about it
I heard some chords on a piano
Everyone was impressed
But I knew it was a trick
It’s called practice
Sometimes it’s just better to leave
It’s better to be your parents
It’s better to be strong
Standing accused of being an adult
It’s amazing
To wake up so bored
Because there is no dread
No secrets
Everything is in front of you
Nothing is watching
Nothing is behind the bush
Nothing is in my hand
Except the longing to touch you
And that’s just it
I can’t grow out of that
It’s like love is always a child
I thought I’d buried it
I saw the flowers drop into the hole
But then they grew
I’d only planted them
Somebody said you were a nice girl
Yeah
You were
I know that
Wild is wild
But nice is loving a cat
And you did
I wondered if she stared out the window
But I know better
Reflection was not her style
Neither was regret
She’d as soon die on a plane crash tomorrow
As grow to be an old lady
It was all life to her
You just live in the moment
Then see what you got at the end of the day
Then forget it
But I couldn’t live like that
I had to assume I was going to survive
For a long time
I don’t want to beg
I don’t want to live in the cheapest place I can find
But I will
If I have to
Because I have before
Before I grew up
It was only a couple of weeks ago
Or years
Or decades
Or another life
It seems I lived one once
I think you were there
Unless it’s a dream
But there’s too much detail
I never sleep that long anyway
It had to be real
That’s why I grew up
Everything a young man needs
Was inside you
And I was there
Inside
And now I walk away
All grown up
Because you were so wild
And I saw myself on the other side
Emerging from the fog of your crazy world
But it was beautiful
Like a morning cloud in a valley
I was in the valley
Now I’m on a hill looking at the cloud
And I know what’s going on down there
Because you’re still there
Because I am an adult
And I hate it

Time reveals all that is true
But will never tell us what to do
It does not rule fate or reveal it's whim
Neither can it feel the struggle within
It is only the heart that can truly act
For though time is spoken as fact
It cannot hear our cries or decide who is worthy
But will reward well those who choose mercy

Where may guile walk
But within the hour of deception?

Where may cunning awaken
But at the dawn of deceit?

The insincere accumulation
Wealth gained without merit
Avarice for advancement
Family name for hubris
Honor for shame
Tradition for currency
Legacy for advantage
Word for reputation

Not born of shrewd duplicity
But fired by the weakness
Of man
In desperation
To elevate his own life
Above that of his mortality
And his fear
Of dying alone
With no mark
Or memory preserved

You were always there waiting
For a patch of blue in a storm cloud
So you could smile even as it rained
Because you knew then that what you waited for
Was not a dream but the water that cooled your mind

You felt love before you left him
Just to save your skin before the tree branch fell
And broke into pieces washing ashore at last
Into your parched living room to rest
So you could stitch the dead leaves into your past

In a dream from which you never could awaken
You reached and called a number that never rang
Because the line wasn’t connected to anything
But an erstwhile lover you sat next to on a broken sofa
As you wondered if he would ever know the song you sing

It’s not the thought of real love that hurts so much
But the empty hands of companionship that caresses
Your life and who you are because of all your losses
And the chance you had to be held at night
As the birds teach us to sing a lullaby with our own voices*


Copyright 2011. All Rights Reserved. Mark Lecuona

Words, never uttered
Not in the way they were meant to be spoken
To live honorably, an honest life
Full of dignity and promises unbroken
Instead, lost moments
Years of pursuing what my flesh would desire
Empathy, only a hint
Swallowed by nights with my mind on fire
Left behind, the past weeps
But it embraces my children beyond its duty
Cleanliness, a robe to wear
Is in the hearts of those who now define beauty
I see poverty, my eyes drawn to them
Touching the souls of those life treats as a sin
They are alive, breathing among us
Their pain is the path where humility will begin

She was a delicate flower
Wind-blown hair and soft petals for hands
Wheat fields in the summer
Green meadows in the spring
But love planted her in desert sands

She grew beneath glowing embers
Pollinated eyes and soft dark soiled feet
Unafraid to be what she was
Knowing her strength
No matter how many storms she may meet

She was life itself
Though drawn to her every kiss flew away
Drinking the dew of dawn
Watching another sun set
Still she believed in what tomorrow might betray

Find the truth, for whatever it may be about why men are killing each other it does not **** God; if he exists then the history of man's inhumanity towards one another and why they may puzzle you with their behavior is irrelevent. Stop justifying that which is the province of Caesar. Are you concerned with being a world power or with being a fisher of men's souls? Regardless of your religion, read the sermon on the mount carefully, then ask yourself what is being asked of you. Then when you see someone who is different than you, you will know what to do. Drop your sword. Do not be afraid. For what you profess to believe is not about how or when you die but about how you live. You cannot judge. Think of your own nature and how you must appear to God. You do not know why another man acts the way he does. You do not know why he is afraid of you because you are only concerned with why you are afraid of him. Elevate yourself above geopolitical politics. Protect the rights of all men. Honor your God in peace. He does not require your help against those who do not believe exactly as you. That is not what is being asked of you. If he is God, then he will never die no matter what happens on Earth. But is it his will that lives or dies in your life? Who decides? You know what to do.

So you don’t like rejection?
How do you think I feel?
I must approach your throne
And hope for audience to my appeal
It is your heart that I see
In the unsmiling face that adorns
It is the wall I must penetrate
And the pain from your past scorns
You sit with arms folded
As I must prove my worth
I know who it is that I am
And I believe in our loves birth
The baby that I deliver to you
Is the one you cannot conceive
It is the love of your life
The one you will not believe
So listen to me closely
As you sift through your choices
You cannot avoid pain and fear
But can you hear me over their voices?
I will not raise mine to you
I will whisper in your ear
From afar you will see me
But my words will draw you near
You remain guarded
As I begin your new life
The gate is tightly drawn
The moat drowns romantic strife
But my words penetrate you
Like a Trojan horse in the night
Except instead of a myth
It will be as real as your eyes so bright
As the sun passes silently
You will open your gates at dawn
You resisted one final time
But my words attacked all night long
And in the end you will wonder
Why you gave the order to ****
What fear ruled over your kingdom
Was choked by love until it was still
Startled to find yourself free
In the fields of flowers and belief
You look to the hand you hold
It is the man you thought was a thief
And as your heart widens
And grows deeper than imagination
I enter the court of a lady’s dreams
And we will dance together as one

I don't want to be the goodbye in you
I just want you to be the hello in me
Don't think about making up your mind
Being a friend is not about how it ends
Time and emotion are both the same
May your feelings be the same as mine

A free man walking
Suffers from no illusions
But what grows green from rocks
Is what he seeks
It reminds him that hope never dies

A free man talking
Suffers from no emotions
But what he hears from ticking clocks
Is how a baby sleeps
Not knowing why his mother cries

A free man provoking
Is like kicking sand into oceans
People hear the way he talks
But ignore why he speaks
They only see white in his darkened eyes

A free man trying
His mind rocked by constant motions
It’s not so easy to feel these thoughts
The truth of the matter is all he keeps
While she drowns in seas that only rise

To grow a rose garden by the drum beat of its thorns
Is to lure their hearts not by the scent of a flower
But instead by a dream that will be awakened by a flood
For the hearts upon which you play will be punctured
And the blood that flows will forever mark your life
What you thought was love was instead oppression
What you thought was life was instead death
For the way of the sword is not the way of the dove

Una Paloma Revolucionaria

Para crecer un jardín de rosas por el ritmo de tambor de sus espinas
Es atraer sus corazones no por el olor de una flor
Pero en lugar de un sueño que será despertado por una inundación
Porque los corazones sobre los que juegas serán pinchados
Y la sangre que fluye siempre marcará tu vida
Lo que pensabas era amor era opresión
Lo que pensabas era vida era en lugar de la muerte
Porque el camino de la espada no es el camino de la paloma

in the dark
a life of its own
is there a way to see you
it’s alright
it’s your own mystery
and you know why

the soft spot in my heart for you
is anywhere you decide to look
you watch me
in the middle of a song
or what the passion I live for
you know it could be about you
but you have be shared
the life I discover
is too narrow a hole to crawl

i can’t seem to decide
the monsters are so familiar
i understand them now
they can’t help themselves
so i ask a simple question
is love worth being eaten alive?

I’m not a loser
I’m just not perfect
I’m not a bad man
I’m just not nice all the time
I’m not weird
I’m just not normal
I’m not strange
I’m just not familiar
I’m not hard
I’m just not easy
I’m not bitter
I’m just not happy all the time
I’m not arrogant
I’m just not humble
I’m not with anyone
I’m just not lonely
I’m not your only lover
I’m just not your first
I’m not what you want me to be
I’m just myself
I’m not worried what you think
I’m just interested in you
I’m not always around
I’m just there when you need me
I’m not meant for anyone
I’m just living my life
I’m not ignoring you
I’m just in my own world sometimes
I’m not leaving
I’m just going to find myself
I’m not gone
I’m just deciding what to do
I’m not afraid
I’m just not sure
I’m not
I’m just

Her skin crawled with fire ants underneath the surface
She couldn’t sleep long enough to dream anymore
Trying to live a life of perfection
She stopped loving everything she once lived for

She was born a foolish dreamer
But the fear of living her dreams was too much
Not knowing if she would ever reach the sea
She became a rock because it was easier to touch

What she forgot was she was the one to break the soil
It didn’t have to be explained to anyone
It didn’t have to matter at the moment
But one day they would realized her fears were their reflection

She wanted to live in a world of high fashion
Cultural expression alluring  rainbow canyon mystery
Until it’s over you can never know what you came to be
She asked someone a question, they said, "It’s your fantasy"

I need to be left alone for a while
That's what we all say
If I could dream even for a moment
That storm won’t break my mast
And the wind won’t blow for long

I need someone who has a life
And doesn’t hate anybody
She’ll read the news like everybody
But she won’t have the heart to judge
‘Cause she knows that’d be wrong

That’s her at the end of the bar
She might be drinking whiskey
She might be drinking wine
I’m gonna’ think about her heart
Just like I want her to think about mine

It’s a crying shame
Somebody trying to care
I can’t figure out why I’m always here
And she’s over there

I need someone like me
I’m not going to think about the past
It’s how I’m gonna’ make love last
I’m not going to compare you to nobody
I’m gonna’ pretend I’m really that strong

That’s her at the end of the bar
She was drinking whiskey
Now she’s drinking wine
I’m gonna’ think about her life
I hope she's thinking about mine

I can’t say how long I’ve been searching
Sometimes I thought I finally found myself
I had a vision of where I might be someday
But to be that person I have to stop looking

I need to know who I am before I go
Every time I relax something happens
The story is never over before it ends
I can’t assume I’m right even if I think so

We spent one night together
Only one night,
like lovers, watching
The heart that melts
And the river that’s made
But it was so long ago
So you tried to fall in love with someone else

I don’t think about being a butterfly
I don’t think about love like a child
So many things happen in the middle of a performance
The curtain came down early but I kept singing anyway

The way you said goodbye sounded like forever
But it’s not an echo that makes a memory
It’s the sound you thought you’d never hear again
Until I whispered the love you thought would never be