What if I told you I never found love What if I told you love never found me Truth is I'm scared to be alone It's funny because everyone dies Only body and bone Whether love tried to exist OR Whether someone thought they loved me I end most of them because I was afraid Afraid to hear that this isn't going to work, I actually didn't like you, Or just afraid to be left I gotten the love people gave me Whether from those many situations Or whether from friendships I never really got to feel that you're my favorite moment It hits when those only moments you got was just never enough It hurts to know people you have hopes and dreams for Break you and tear those hopes and dreams apart For me love always lurks Even when love doesn't work I barely love myself When all my figures and flaws turn into a doubt Its something I should feel proud about Sometimes I don't Love for me is hard to find maybe it's hard for love to find me What if I told you love and I are not to combine Been months now, not knowing what love is Knowing what love is, is like knowing all that it is
My worst fear is to be alone. No friends. No family. Just me. I don't want to wake up someday and realize I have no one. That I pushed people away Or made them hate me for some reason. Is it bad that it scares me to the point that I can't be myself, No matter what? Is that bad? Its ******* terrifying to me. Its hard being alone. Its dreadful. I mean I try to talk to someone all the time. I don't know if I do it to distract myself from my thoughts. Or just the fact that I like people. Am I the only one like this? Probably not. But still. It terrifies me. Just the thought of being completely alone make me upset. Like I want to start bawling. I already feel alone. But I have people around me. People I can text. Friends I can call. Family I can talk to. But I have never been completely alone. It can happen. I'm young. Anything. I have years to make sure this doesn't happen to me. Well, who knows if I have years. I could die tomorrow. Or even tonight. But the thought of being completely alone keeps me up at night. It makes me strive to make new friends. To meet new people. To constantly be on call with someone. To even occupy my brain with something else. Like playing video games. Watching YouTube or Netflix. Am I the only one that is terrified of this?
I don’t know if I wander about in your dreams I just can’t decide if I’d rather be rumor or fact I feel like a silent movie with a broken light I need to know my audience so I know how to act
I had a pain like something serious in your chest It felt like I should call a doctor but it’s not that bad Most times I forget it ever happened But this time it lingered and made be sad
It’s too bad we can’t tune our life up like a guitar We get stretched and left in a corner somewhere But in the right hands we can make magic again It’d be easy if we could just find someone to care
I think I need to start by not thinking about happy It’s a goal but at the same time it’s just too much Why does life always have to be a project anyway? The only way to get there is to lighten our touch