I just feel so alone,
and it's not that I need someone,
well, it is
but not someone certain,
just someone who will,
give me that love,
I crave,
Anyone.
But I haven't been loved,
for a very long time,
and I realize that I now,
I have shut everybody out,
until there was nobody left,
to love me,
I know now, that I am a human.
that I, too, need a lovers touch,
and kind words,
that I am no different,
that I crave affection.

I don't like being human,
I don't like destroying myself,
I don't know why.

Life is loosely based on losing sight of the silver lining on the cloud,
On trying to hold on to that one distant memory that is slowly slipping away.

It’s based on the challenges that come, and finding their solutions.
Also, it’s based on the days when inspiration is lost, or when you get that one special feeling and try not to lose your hold of it. Eventually, you hope not to be grasping at thin air.

When you find yourself doing this, the thrill you've felt steadily seeps out like a drenched sponge being pressed until dry.

Life is a flower on a continuous cycle: sprouting, growing, blooming, withering, and soundlessly letting go of existence and time on earth, eventually giving way to whatever one believes comes next.

Furthermore, life is loosely based on its connection to death.


l.j.

When I think about you, my mind travels to March.
The time when we met under the great marble arch.
I was in college and you were on tour,
As I saw your face, you held an allure.

I remember you smiling and saying hello.
I had nothing to do, and nowhere to go.
We went out for lunch and we watched a movie.
You invited me to go with you shipping at sea.

At the time, it seemed great; living, boating under the sun.
Spur of the moment and amazingly fun.
I jumped at the idea, naught holding me back.
But nothing prepared me for when I heard that hull crack.

We’d been sailing for ages, I was used to this life.
No terror, no worries, no hunger, no strife.
No fear in my mind, only love on the great sea.
When the ship fell apart, I thought I could not breathe.

I heard all the screams, but it seemed too surreal.
I came to my senses and my mind began to reel.
Water washed over me, I clung at driftwood.
I struggled for air as hard as I could.

When I finally surfaced, my heart skipped a beat.
I saw you away from me, maximum thirty feet.
I paddled so madly; I paddled for love.
My heart sank like our ship when you sank from above.

I was going quite crazy; I was hurt, I was damaged.
As the helicopter came, I felt trapped– unable to manage.
My true love was gone; there was no going back.
That nightmare, that sound of that sturdy hull, “CRACK!!”

It is all I am left with. I have nothing more.
My dear, how I miss you. It is you I adore.
I will always love you, as promised in March.
That day I fell in love under the great marble arch.