How does it feel like to carry half a moon and half a night.
like Standing half in sand and half in sea.
like Watching a boat on the shore, while drowning.
& Writing your name on the sand. half of it on surface & half in water.
Don't you think its perfect, may be only half of it.
Reaching the end, or celebrating it while standing in half of it.
May be its the last minute or just half of it.
May be the half that is untouched is more precious.
There must be a reason half in heart and half remains
within you.
Its better to be half a fool for half a dream.

It was February 2020,
Exam season,
Six o'clock in the evening,
So the news spread,
"In the country's largest city,
Two Corona patients tested positive"
Life was in its own wave,
I asked for a small prayer,
"Just don't want to give any exam tomorrow"
A five day holiday was announced on T.V,
i was fully  happy,
about that,
I will not have to get up and go to school next day,
i slept  all the  day,
and,
posting memes on Facebook,
Uploading status on Instagram,
then,
It was the last day of the holiday,
I was afraid that now there will be exam ,
But then  ,
an announcement came " a month holiday "
The number of patients kept on increasing day by day,
First two, then twelve, then three hundred, and then a thousand,
then after someday,
Home and me,
These four walls,
myself and old memories,
good mornings were turning to fearing days,
because the lock down happened ,
the markets closed ,the parks closed ,
the malls closed ,the banks closed
the  court close ,the business closed
traveling band  
It just took a month,
I saw a  whole new  life,
When the police had tears in their eyes,
Standing across the praying area, he said with folded hands
and said ,
for God sake ,
Stay away from here and protect yourself and your family,
The guards patrolled at night,
i will never forget the horn of the police car,
But the country's poor have lost their livelihood,
their children went to bed hungry,
The laborer did not receive his earnings,
I saw anguish in some eyes,
I saw this long line of beggars,
Who only had to live up to the morning,
I saw a doctor in the hospital,
And those in uniform on the streets,
No one wants their loved ones to leave them alone,
I saw those who gave their lives,
I saw those who saves others lives,
Everyone had to save the country,
I saw the plague was same for both the king and the slave,
I saw years in a year,
I saw helplessness,
I slept myself all the days ,
My country's markets are closed,
The roar of my streets is gone,
some dreams should  remain dreams,
Some desires force us to put masks on our faces,
Some mistakes leads to  distances,
Today is May, I have only one wish,
I want to spend the day at the roadside,
and Let me put heat of  sun in my eyes,
I want to look at it until its rays dissolve in my tears,
I want to tore this year's page from the book of life,
and someday,
i wish ,
announcement on TV will come that "we have got rid of this epidemic covid19".

You know your life is full
You know what it is like to shake hands when you leave the house
you know what its is like to say your first greeting
You know what it is like to watch the sun shine in your eyes at dawn
You know what it is like to sit in the bus seat and watch people walk in their own tune?
You know what it's like to be a part of a crowd and then get lost in it
You know there is a way to get ahead in the race
You know you want to stop. You're tired
You know the echo of the train from the road above
You know that the first greetings of the morning  is your beginning
Do you know what to do with careless walking?
Do you know when the rain looks good?
You know  when the rain is bring your heart to life
You find that every drop of it makes you happy
You know the sounds of those laughs is coming from the next two streets
You know those kids playing in the park in front of you, and the next moment they were fighting  together.
You know you're laughing at your heart 
You know, today you all messed up things  but then you gave up it to  tomorrow
you know that you have a sky full of stars to forget about the night?
You know someone was looking for me by my name. Then they called my name and said we will meet again tomorrow
You know how easy it is to say goodbye to someone
you know  you are thinking like there is no break in your life?
You know what it means to live life
You think life is what you are given
You know life is hollow today
You know the sun was watching you today with anger
You know there are few   left to hear your first greeting
You know the silence echoing on the upper street
You know, people now stopping somewhere along the way
You know you want this race to come into existence again
You know, you know, crowds are a solution you can lose yourself in
You know hope is like that
You know you have a lot of trouble today for tomorrow's mistake
You know there are no kids crying  in the park in front of you
You know the next two lanes are door bands
You know that drop of rain was like ***** mud
Do you know when the rain looks bad?
You know what the distances from fear are
you know what it is like to loose the authorities
You know what life is all about
You know what the fear of death is
You know in some days they won't remember our name
You know, their memories will blur our faces
You know what I'm thinking

I’ve experienced seven hundred and seventy moulds

I died from minerality and become vegetable

And from vegetative-ness I died and become animal

I died from animality and became man

Then why fear disappearance through death?

For the next time I shall die

Bring forth wings and feathers like angels

After that soaring higher than angels

What you cannot imagine I shall be that.

No one is happy
it's just his own acting
one says it all
other one  hides it!

shallah tatti hawah na lagi
shallah jhugi badhh rawi
shallah rab kand na lavi
shallah sokhi manzala honi
shallah uchay fakar honi
shallah  sham na thivi
shallah

There are two men on the earth
both with closed eyes
Both are fighting
There is a mirror in  their hands
  One says hold my mirror
Other says my mirror is more clearly visible
The glass says what you are doing here
I say
world was screaming so i am here
I ask  from them  that these  mirrors are not showing your own face
the mirror replied  they haven't used me for themselves  they only use me to see others
I say to both of them
Why do not you open your  eyes?
The mirror says
If they would  open their  eyes, I will break
I say I'll bring them a new mirror
the mirror laughed at me
and said they will close their eyes
I look at the mirror
The sunlight  was falling on the mirror
i felt a pain in my eyes
so i  closed my eyes
Now I have a mirror in my hand
reflecting faces in opposite directions

How many reflections went into me
Then don't know where they gone ...
I wished that all the  wounds healed
only wounds were filled into me...
i was the moment  that has  eaten centuries
All those times  passed into me...
the one that is me  ,  remained just a bit
The one that was you  ,was   dead into me ...
#i #bit #poem #poetry #quotes #reflection #dead

was an idea
became a dream
was a fantasy
became real
was fading
became cleared
was a fear
became pain
was a distance
became closer
fall asleeped
was watched
was a person
became worthfull
was an idea
became a dream
eyes opened
became destroyed
the idea was worthless

do these emotions remain the same on paper ?

do these emotions remain the same on paper ?

What shall I be?

I’ve again and again grown like grass.

I’ve experienced seven hundred and seventy moulds

I died from minerality and become vegetable

And from vegetative-ness I died and become animal

I died from animality and became man

Then why fear disappearance through death?

For the next time I shall die

Bring forth wings and feathers like angels

After that soaring higher than angels

What you cannot imagine I shall be that.

i was becoming a blind ...I did not want to see anything
I was becoming a dumb  ... I did not want to speak anything,
i was becoming a deaf .... i did not want to hear anything

but
some were having eyes... who were looking carefully
some were having ears.... who were listening deeply
some were having tongues ... who were speaking very loudly

There were many people on the road but
i was the only traveler
There was noise in me too
a voice of " hide me please "
I could even see if I could see it
It was just my eyes...Who stopped me
I put the hands on the ears
then
I ran so fast

Their hands were not mixed when they left
Why did they go, even not told  that?
It looks like they are just coming to return
They even not shattered the lamp
Maybe they should be meet but  bet is to search
they did not erased their foot steps
Every time they left me in  anxiety
When will they return? they never told
they  did not left me of any mean
And they did not even get  me mixed in the dust
when they left

Do you know
You do not even remember it at all
The first moment ..... where tomorrow the creater
Mold my clay
Strange was the rough soil ... no reflection was bright
No fearture was clear
But what happened then?
Then creater ...carve for your heart ...
Then he gave beats to your heart clay
Those beats were witness  to... start of the journey  
Journey? ... what kind of journey was that ......?

Clay of thirst ,Wearing the mask of prayers , climbing from this street to that
Holding the palms of  wind  burning  the clouds



My Creator your image is incomplete .... my part of meditation
is necessary.
I know ... you heard all this story there
But
Love carve you . ....before me
I  heared that artist gave you the mirror and then asked you .... that any difference there ?
There is a difference ... ??
Your lips moved ....... you  Just said "Ahad"
He smiled. Shuffle the ***** soil
And on the other side of your heart he grown it like a seed  


That was the moment of my creation.
Then you tell me  this story
Without whom my character is alone in this story
are   you complete   without me.
Or ... like me .......... "incomplete".......

HE SAID: "Who's knocking at my door?"
Said I: "Your humble servant!"
Said He: "What business have you got?"
Said I: "I came to greet You!"
Said He: "How long are you to push?"
Said I: "Until You'll call me!"
Said He: "How long are you to boil?"
Said I: "Till resurrection!"
I claimed I was a lover true
and I took may oaths
That for the sake of love I lost
my kingdom and my wealth!
He said: "You make a claim - the judge
needs witness for your cause!"
Said I: "My witness is my tears,
my proof my yellow face!"
Said He: "The witness is corrupt,
your eye is wet and ill!"
Said I: "No, by Your eminence:
My eye is sinless clear!"
He said: "And what do you intend?"
Said I: "Just faithful friendships!"
Said He: "What do you want from me?"
Said I: "Your grace abundant!"
Said He: "Who travelled here with you?"
Said I: "Your dream and phantom!"
Said He: "And what led you to me?"
Said I: "Your goblet's fragrance!"
Said He: "What is most pleasant, say?"
Said I: "The ruler's presence!"
Said He: "What did you see there, friend?"
Said I: "A hundred wonders!"
Said He: "Why is it empty now?"
Said I: "From fear of brigands!"
Said He: "The brigand, who is that?"
Said I: "IT is the blaming!"
Said He: "And where is safety then?"
Said: "In renunciation."
Said He: "Renunciation? That's ... ?"
Said I: "The path to safety!"
Said He: "And where is danger, then?"
Said I: "In Your love's quarters!"
Said He: "And how do you fare there?"
Said I: "Steadfast and happy."
I tested you and tested you,
but it availed to nothing -
Who tests the one who was once tried,
he will repent forever!
Be silent! If I'd utter here
the secrets fine he told me,
You would go out all of yourself,
no door nor roof could hold you!

Two shadows
Were my home
That was my comfort zone
One before me
One behind me
Two walls
Big and tall
I was following those steps
In between the path
I lost one
Where it gone now
Two shadows
One was before me
Another was of my own
How will i reach home now
my home is broken now
The home with  one wall
Is incomplete now
I am remained with my own shadow
Whoes steps will i follow now
Where is the home now
My vision was in between those two shadows
How can i see now
No light for me ?
My world between those two walls
Was  too small
What to do with this world now
This rising sun is too hot now
Its hard to open my eyes now
And look around
Will that shadow come back now
I find out a solution now
I am searching for bricks
To put them all
before me
Behind me  
To the rising sun
One by one i will make the wall
And burried me down
Imagine how i am looking now
In deep and down

reddish seasons , no fogs
a lot of suffocation , no air
denser nights , no candle
this sky ,is not new

wake up , don't be wrong
the world , sold to the world
once sure , now sold the thought
mud, in hair of ground

once was known , now a stranger
nobody has  remained with his  owns
upsetting situation, look at the ashes
a play of entertainer had seen

but
now i find it ,this is not the case

this sky ,will burst into two ,
and  a  new hope will be  grew

GOD is with me !

The shortest distance between two people is their identity

most of the people dies at 25 ,but they can not be buried ,
until they reaches 75

distance is a vampire ,it eats whole relation

the man who is laughing too much
will loose his worth

I also keep on touching the contact
I also meet  people and also keep a distance .
I do not have grief now, who lefts me
I still opens my doors ,  after breaking up relations
I am coming from the rotation of the seasons
i Remember also the incidents  of the Autumn
i have changed my self according to time then
I also have the courage to change time
I'm worried, wounds are forgotten after they heal so,
i keeps some old wound un stitched as well
I do not ask for any destination anymore
Every moment i keeps the clock in the feet
I am agree  Abrak, on people talks
I keeps angels of my thoughts

wish that would have happened
Whatever we want
They all got to meet us
Then we were in heaven
does not wanted  for world
did not have a song of kun "let it be"
The world is worldly again
Did not want to be in heaven
Just  we were lived

Talk to the Lord whenever you are disappointed..
wish for the loyalty,search for travel.....
disappointment !....
It happens  often,that you gets lost.....
if you will know  the luck as bad,then it goes asleep,,,,,
If you have strength,keep the chain of loyalty.....
What you call creator,So contact him,,,,,,,
I am claiming,you will never fail......
Understand love of God,you will never lost,,,,,,,

have you seen the wind ever ?
not i , nor you ?          
when leaves makes noise......
they tell us that ....
wind has passed..........

who has seen the wind?
nor he ,  nor you......
when the head of tree bends ..
then we come to know....
wind has passed...

wish that would have happened
Whatever we want
They all got to meet us
Then we were in heaven
does not wanted  for world
did not have a song of kun "let it be"
The world is worldly again
Did not want to be in heaven
Just  we were lived

i often feels that every man is running behind every other...
??

time
                                         "for me"
                                          shorter in felicity
                                          longer in  misery
                                          why
                                          bliss is brief
                                          exact time ,
                                          and " another person "is in misery
                                          GOD's  justice !

O God, don’t give me such a feeling of greatness (of intelligence)
That I lose myself and can’t see anything else beyond me...
The world will consider you guilty
If you try and explain yourself this much...
Laugh out as much today, so in all this noise
The sound of cries is not heard by anyone...
There is still a lot of blood flowing in my veins (still a lot of anger)
(Even if you) ****** away my pen, don’t give me the ink....
God is the name to that feeling, that emotion
That is in front of you and yet is unseen....

I wish happiness sold
And there was a stall of grief
Tears comes in a penny
And love in four pennies
(Whole world in five pennies )
Free laughs and free stars
The moon also  sold shredded pieces
Will not have a wish(no name of wish)
Everybody gets their hands up
if we wanted ,We  die
If our hearts desired, we live
There were no cities great  and small
The water was also home
(Wish to had feathers )
And that dark blue skies
farther to Seven seaside beaches
Jungle, rivers, falling water
Everything would have been your own
There would be no limit
What would have been done
Moon rays wear
And quietly sleeping
Keep nights for the days
Wish happy wishes !!

life ,a unmusical sound

Wash all the filth away and change my dead heart
Make me alive again, give me a fresh start
So change my heart please and wash the filth away
Don't leave me drowning here alone and astray.
I spent my life running away from you
And now I have no where to turn except to you
I turn to you and begging you to be saved
And change me into an obedient slave
I have been doing all my life what I craved
Shaytan and nafs have always held me enslaved
I am ashamed that I have broken your rules
Worshiped my nafs and feel an ignorant fool
But now I know the path leading me to deen
I bow to you and asking you to help me
But now I know the path leading me to deen
I bow to you and asking you to help me
I wish your name to be engraved in my heart
I will be grateful to you - change this dead heart
I wish your name to be engraved in my heart
I will be grateful to you - change this dead heart
My heart is dark and so my eyes remain dry
Hypocrisy and hubris won't let me cry
I'm at your door and begging you let me in
Don't push me back to my hopeless life of sin
I'm at your door and begging you let me in
Don't push me back to my hopeless life of sin
So change my heart and forgive my sins this day
Don't leave me drowning here alone and astray
Wash all the filth away and change my dead heart
Make me alive again, give me a fresh start.
#junaid jamshaid
#dua