Love is not giving yourself away piece by shattered piece
to convince him to feel about you what you feel for him
it is not a million misused chances for the stubborn hope that the pretty words you write will make him want to stay
it is not allowing him to treat your body like a hotel, to come and go in his own pleasure
because he knows better than to think there will come a day where you may have changed the locks
love is not an inexhaustible cycle of sleepless nights
spent wondering what variant of himself he may show you tomorrow
if he shows you one at all
love is not stripping yourself of all the armor you put on to shield away all of his demons
his lips may taste like honey but baby they burnt your skin
and he is already painting her the pictures you thought were only meant for you

She sees heaven in his eyes
He sees a hell in her heart
Too many times she's been hurt
and torn all apart
He sees her suffering
She sees that he's trying
But something inside her
Feels like she's dying
She knows it's worth fighting
He knows how much she's struggling
Struggling with pain versus time
Never knowing if she'll make it through
Like she's blind, walking a twisted path
He guides her towards the truth
She falls behind, she's just too tired
He turns around, sees her lying on the ground
Adrenaline kicks in
He has to carry her out of this place
A heavy load to bare, he struggles through
He takes the weight on his shoulders
Pain, sorrow and a lifetime of despair
Knowing she's his one saving grace
He pushes on until he sees the light up ahead
The final stretch, but he feels heaven on his side
Wondering if he'll make it after how much he's bled
And how much he's cried
The bright light awakens her
She holds on tight, crying tears of joy
With a kiss and a laugh they move on together
Cause love is something even hell can't destroy

Never enough.
Never enough of anything.
It's always running low,
running out.
Money, energy, time.

The fuel gauge
threatens empty.
The bank balance
teeters and tips
into the red.
Almost out of smokes, and there's
one last shot
in the bottle.
The car tax expires
in two days.

You've been
exhausted
since forever.
You can't kid yourself
that you're young any more.
Clocks tick
just to **** with you.
It's dark, but
not as dark
as it gets.

Trying to be a few rays of light
And a shade from blinding light.
Trying to be a part of the solution
Though it's easy to unwittingly
Contribute to the pollution.
By the sheer fact of being human
We can at times and by turns
And at the same time be
Culprit and victim
Survivor and casualty.

"I think therefore I am"
but
not this man who I see
whilst having my tea,

the bathroom mirror mimics me
and yet if I don't look
I won't cross the lines that meet
in crows feet.

Head's full of cotton wool today
and as if to say, I told you so,
cotton buds blossom
between each toe.

This cannot be real.

I watch as the faces
congeal and
set into one,
if I am
then it goes on too

Saturday mirrors me blue.

The wake up call
bells ring
rainfall.

It'll clear
and as I peer again
it has.

I still look the same
but different.

Love me or hate me,
I will never let you go,
Being with you makes my heart glow,
I will stay by your side holding your fragile hand,
look into your eyes so you could understand,
For you are the reason why my heart is still beating.

When you like somebody so much but you don't know how to tell him,
When you are not sure about what you feel.
When you want to ask him to stay longer but he has to pick up his mom.
When you can't hide the disappointment on your face.
But he said that this soon shall pass.

When he said he was attracted to you
When he hugs you and buries his face in your hair,
When he looks at you with his baby blues so clear
When he laughs with you
When he listens so attentively when you talk
The world is filled with colors

When you knew it was coming
But you thought you could dodge it
When he sat down and said sorry.

When he texts you, When he said he would text you
When he talks with modal auxiliary verbs.
When he tells you his family history.
When I see his eyes brighten
When I think I am falling but don't know his side of story.
are all fragments of our memories.

When he said it's still beautiful to leave when you have developed feelings.

Remember me when you leave.

"I Love U" whispered the Moon  to the Sun. A forlorn look crept into her eyes. "I've always been in love with you", she whispered in a hoarse voice, choking on the oceans of love which welled up in her eyes.  A whisper barely audible and poignant.  She looked at the Sun, knowing fully well that she cud never stand in the brilliance of his love. Knowing that as the day separated the night their love could never unite. Yet she pined for him, with undying love.

She revolved around the earth, but her heart had only eyes for him. Of all the planets she had to fall in love with him.  A tiny spec, unnoticed in the galaxy.

Eclipses were short lived phenomena occurring few and far in between, rare and once in a year maybe.

But she waited for the day, when she would bask in his glory and be the cynosure of his eyes alone. She waited patience personified, knowing it was sheer madness to love the Sun.  Dazzling, hot and magnificent that he was, the universe revolved around him. He didn't even know she existed. Except for that one special day, when his eyes would notice her momentarily.

So she dressed up as pretty as she cud hoping his wayward heart would see, that it was her love which adorned her.  Just the thought of seeing him upfront would bring a twinkle in her eyes.

She waited with baited breath for that fleeting moment, shorter than a quarter of a hour. A quarter of an hour in the 8760 hours he spent outside of her world. While she waited, hopelessly endlessly, pining for the his love.

Then mockingly he came to her at last. At that designated time, teasing her about how naive she was. "Show me" she blurted with baited breath, her heart racing the universe in those fleeting moments. So he gathered her in his huge embrace and pressed his wild heart close to her breast. And in that embrace the earth was eclipsed in their union.

She could feel his wild heart through the layers of the physical distance which still separated them and she closed her eyes to his scent, the scent of the universe, that brought waves of nostalgia. She longed for more, and hugged him back. Aching to tell him how much she loved him and wanted this moment to last.  She wondered what it would be like to taste him.  She wanted his brilliance to permeate every fiber of her being.  But, she realized she was playing with the Sun.  His fire would consume her, if she flew too close to him.

He seemed unruffled, as she quivered at his touch, his scent, so full of him and so dizzy with that euphoria. Did time stop? Would the universe allow a few seconds of oblivion?

But then the world was in an eclipse. He had to leave.  So softly he whispered in her ear, "I have to leave". Reluctantly she let go, feeling the extricated from the universe, as if separating from him, meant death, fearing that perhaps this may be the last time she would see Him.

For as the world waited with expectation for an eclipse to occur and counted days when their union would be so spectacular, it also longed for normalcy.  Something wasn't right when the Moon embraced the Sun. A tiny creature smaller than the earth, she shouldn't dare hold him, they said.

She for once knew what it was to keep wandering in eternity, with so much love held in her ***** with the only hope that an eclipse would occur some day and that her yearning for the Sun would never ever fade or dwindle, in this lifetime or the next. A tsunami of a sob escaped her lips, oceans in turmoil. The door had closed on her universe, she was in a darkness. She could feel his warmth even then, but it began to grow cold. A panic started to form as she struggled to retain control.

He however, was far away unknown to her misery.  He on the other hand, belonged to the universe, no one could hold him back. Self-made, disciplined, his was a journey few would understand.

She did, she perfectly did understand. Only, she didn't expect anything from him, except few words of reciprocation. Few words, that he loved her just the same way, that she meant something to him. That his heart beat the same way for her.  She also knew that this experience meant nothing to the Sun, he would move on as he always did. He had a status to keep and the universe was watching.

But alas, he was The Sun, would he tell a tiny insignificant creature like her anything at all?

The Sun left her abode, he shrugged off the experience, and got back on his journey. While far away those watching the Sun, began to notice that a few spots had appeared on the Sun.  A memory of where he had embraced the Moon, had left a black hole on his heart.

Dedicated to the one and only man my heart loves

I am free!
A heavy Fear of being alone!
A fear of not find Love!
It is not anymore there inside!
I am Sad!
I am Alone!
I am Lost!
with all of that I am having a beauty!
A beauty that I am finding a meaning in falling....
The beauty in feeling the pain...
The Beauty in having those wounds to remind me that i am human!
I have Spoken all of my words with no tears and regrets...
I have spoken with pain and power...
I have spoken my lost for the eager to be Free!