I am 50 shades of an emotional wreck
Everything in my life is tumbling down, what the heck
I don't know what to do, who to turn to or what to say
But no matter how hard I try the pain just won't go away
I am so sick of being hurt from the same person over and over again
It's really killing me inside. When will the pain end?
What hurts the most is knowing that he moved on
Yet I'm still here all alone, reminiscing about what we had for so long
The sad part is that I actually feel like I deserve this
I mean not fully but I mean, I wasn't perfect
Oh mehn, I have to get the negative thoughts out of my head
Before I explode and cry all night in bed
This just doesn't feel right
How could the boy that I loved forget about me just like that?
I mean, I know I wasn't perfect but I thought we had something special
But what can I do now except get over it
And accept the fact that he ain't ****.

In a world that constantly praises similarities of classes of people I find no space to be me
I am confined to this box of mediocrity where being like everyone else is awesome and being different is not okay
It's unfair that I am frowned upon because I fail to conform to modern perceptions of who I should be or what I should do or what I should wear
I may not look like you, I may not talk like you and I definitely may not act like you
But that's okay, I am who I am and you are who you are
Imagine if all snow flakes were the same or all spots on a Dalmatian had the same pattern, there would be nothing interesting about it
Enjoy being different
Have fun challenging the status quo
You were born to be different
You were born to stand out
In this identity crisis that the world is currently going through, embrace what makes you who you are and be uniquely you, a Shining Star!

She lost herself while searching for herself in the eyes of someone else
She lost herself trying to seek validation from others
She lost herself in hopes of trying to be like everyone else
She lost herself trying to do what she thought would make others happy, ignoring her own need for happiness in the process
She lost herself fighting for the love of everyone around her
She lost herself in the midst of "What Ifs?", failing to take chances
She lost herself to the sounds of this world that often told her what she couldn't do
She lost herself while ignoring the voice inside her head that told her to get out, take a risk and make her dreams come true
She lost herself over and over again
No matter how hard she tried, she lost herself....

They call it *** for tat
I call it an exchange for that…

That favor you owed me
Oh, did you think that was free?

Do you really think it’s fair for you to take what’s mine
Yet if I ask for it back it’s not fine

Do you think it’s okay for me to show you respect
Yet when I ask for it in return you just continue to neglect

Neglect me, my wants and my needs
But yet I should stroke your ego and plant unwanted seeds

I don’t mean to be rude but I need to keep it real
If you don’t mind, I need something I can feel

I’m gonna need some reciprocity
Just give me a little hope and positivity

Love me like the moon loves the sun
Making way for her in the morning even though his sojourn had just begun

Love me like the grass loves the rain
Begging for just a little taste to help it grow and ease it's pain

Love me like birds love nectar from a flower
Allow me to be overcome by your power

Love me like the morning loves it's dew
Never wake up without me laying next to you

Love me like the bees love their queen
Treat me like I'm royalty and allow your love to always be seen

Love me like you know I deserve to be loved
Take a page out of nature's book of love

I heard it all before
I'm just not pretty enough
I'm cute but just not that pretty
I look too young

I don't wear enough make up and I don't dress grown enough
I'm not assertive and I don't demand attention
No one will ever notice me

I don't go out enough and I don't party as much as other girls
So what exactly does that mean?
Does that mean a boy can't like a girl like me?
I want to be pretty
I want to feel loved
But sometimes I just feel not good enough...

I can’t do this. It’s not you it’s me. I think we need to put this on hold.
All things that girls say to him as their future relationships unfold
After being mistreated, abused, neglected, rejected and taken advantage of he just can’t take it anymore
Because these girls didn’t realize that for them, he would cross the seven seas, climb the highest mountain and so much more
He was the most dedicated person when it came to his relationships
Staying up all night, 5 am calls, thoughtful gifts and maybe even surprise trips
But even doing all of that, the girls didn’t realize how special he was until it was too late
He still didn’t let the hurt bother him because he knew that he would find his true love someday by fate
Until then, all of his relationships would end with goodbye
Because he was the unappreciated guy….

My name is Royalty, the daughter of a King. I am clothed in righteousness and adorned in strength
My ability and skill daily reaches new lengths
I am girded with love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control
I am capable of achieving my dreams and aspirations is what I am always told
I accessorize my outfit with my belt of truth, shield of faith, helmet of salvation and my favorite; my sword of the spirit
By wearing these accessories daily, I am able to reach new limits
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me
Because to Him, I know a princess I will always be
I strive daily to make Him proud
I am the Daughter of a King and I will scream it out loud
I will praise God in the valley and I will praise Him on the mountain top
Because I know His love for me will NEVER stop
My name is Royalty, the daughter of a King and one day I plan to receive my crown of salvation
Will you come along with me on my trip to Heaven for an eternal vacation?

As dumb as it may seem, after all the bad times, she honestly thought it was meant to be
Despite all of the do not cross, slow down and proceed with caution signs she thought she was ready
Tear after tear, heartbreak after heartbreak, she still didn’t get the memo
You see because, he said I’m sorry and covered her bruises with that Band-Aid
All awhile his love for her slowly fade
Those butterflies in her tummy made her think she was in love
But that was just a sign of uncertainty from the one above
But she couldn’t let the boy of her dreams go because she couldn’t sleep at night
Even though deep down, she knew something wasn’t right
She went through 5 long years of pain, suffering, defeat and denial
While he enjoyed lust, the fast life and a couple girl trials
Attempts to speak to him and tell him about her problems was a lost cause
Because he didn’t care about her anymore because his love life now had no laws
Then she told him she loved him and waited for his response in return
10 long seconds of waiting made her stomach churn
Then she realized that their love wasn’t meant to be and she painfully asked herself
Why??? Why did this have to happen to me?
Then he looked up and whispered, you know I love you too
But they both knew that what he said wasn’t true
So she took a deep breath and she quietly said
Its official, the love I once had for you is now dead!

Secret admirer….secret lover....the one I dream about at night
When we finally got to talk, it took all of my might
You see, I spotted you from across the room for a while now
When we finally made eye contact and I gazed into your eyes it made me think, oh wow
This guy, he’s more than just a handsome face
He’s sweet and intelligent and he handles everything with such grace
He epitomizes how to treat a lady
He’s someone I would hope to one day call baby
A perfect gentleman in all his ways
I guess being in the Gentleman’s club really pays
As a whiff of his cologne goes up my nostrils while in his warm embrace I feel a high
And I realize that this is where I belong, in his arms, never saying goodbye

A river flowed from the most inner depths of my soul
Tainted scars fixated themselves onto my already blemished face
The improbable transpired as my once wholesome heart sat on the floor aloof due to the fact that the one being that once breathed oxygen into my lungs now nefariously tore at my skin with his nails that were stained from the fluorescent blood that slowly escaped my debilitated body. He snidely smirked at his destruction

Before taking my final breath, screams escaped from my torn lips as I recounted the years of agony he bestowed on me
Then my motionless body was comforted by the fact that the suffering had finally ceased...

Hey there,
I am me. Me am I.
A black beauty am I.
The sun smiled at my body and turned my skin into its own little chocolate factory.
Several shades of a dazzling dark complexion.
A black beauty am me.
As I walk, the view of my curves captivates the attention of all those looking on.
Wow they say, **** isn't she fine.
A black beauty am I.
People often underestimate my potential but they don't know that there's more to me than meets the eye.
My intelligence allows my voice to be heard because I excel at everything I do.
A black beauty am me.
A warrior, a fighter, a lover and a friend. I am a black beauty who believes in the power of sisterhood
to uplift rather than tear down;
to encourage rather than discourage;
to dream rather than to fight.
Not only am I beautifully black but I am me and me am I...Black beauty....