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My minds swelling up with thoughts of you
like air balloons in July
I can't help but feel polluted
My heads unraveling, I'm tired, restless, and I'd be lying to myself
If I said I didn't miss your presence
Eventually I'll reach the end of my heights
I'll burst into debri and I hope it decends on you like rain made out of memories
And while you're drowning in my thoughts
my love, I'll say, how beautiful you look drenched in pain.
jolted from your slumber like a dead engine
panicked, you reach into the abyss for some sort of comfort
only to find that every liquid fantasy dissipates upon your touch
this forest of dreams has become a woodland of nightmares
eyes bleeding tears as the mist envelops you
it shoves you to the floor
screaming every insecurity back into your swollen skull
transparent devils dance at your feet
as they point to a tombstone engraved with your name
it seems like there is no hope for you
yes, even the dream catcher above your bed lost faith
but there is something keeping you alive
continue your fight
grab my hand in the darkness
for i am the comfort you have been searching for
because i too scream silence into the fear of the night
It stood on a throne,
Made out of lime stone.

It was clothed,
In colorless gold.

It wore a shadeless crown,
Above its brow.

Its heart was frozen-
From winters night.

Its soul was diced,
by Jack Frost's knife.

It stood alone,
In its quite abyss.
Dismissing my stare.

Though it was free,
It looked lost at sea.

For, I waited to hear a plea,
But it was silent as a willow tree.

Time passed-
And it started to bow

To the brown earth beneath its feet,
To the blue sky above its crown.

Though, the journey was over,
And the final Goodbyes were made.

I could never forget the pride in its eyes,
Or why it stood so still.

For to this day,
I question if I'll every discover,
If the White Rose knew,
Of its wonder?
Copyright © 2015 Paul Forbes All Rights Reserved
With sweet lips spewing lies
Of life's grand perfections;
Fictitious light placed inside
My 'ever vacant wandering eyes.

Id nod my head; shake their hand
While pretending I was joyous;
Laugh about and dance around
While we listened to the band.

With a wide smile upon my face
The photographer snapped a shot;
Eternalizing "lovely" depression, of which
Seeped into my soul and stole my grace.

I'm drowning in the screaming words
Of all the truths I've never shared;
They’ve become my grim lullabies
Forever sung by my inner songbirds.

-ARI
I would have taken the easy path
But that would leave no room for glory
I would have picked out a comfortable life
But that isn't God’s kind of story

I would have followed a prettier road
But missed the most beautiful way
I would have clung to familiar things
But lived out my days in the grey

I would have chosen what’s stable
But grown cold, apathetic and bored
I would have sought out earth’s riches
But lost all that in heaven is stored

I would have liked more successes
But not learned so quickly of grace
I would have seen myself praised more
But given up knowing God’s face

I would have tied all my loose ends
But not known it’s He Who brings peace
I would have wanted for happier times
But traded a joy that can’t cease

I would have opted for normal
But not tasted rare delicacies
I would have preferred a man’s love
But been robbed of Divine intimacy

He’s chosen for me the high road
More jagged, more narrow and steep
So now I must travel this difficult way
Ever knowing it leads to the deep

Now I must choose to cherish His path
And trust Him to walk with me there
Now I must hasten to take up my cross
The fellowship of His sufferings to share

For one day this life will be over
And all my afflictions will end
It is then I will see what all this is for
In my Bridegroom, my Savior, my Friend
~~~

"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."
~ 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

~~~
We stop at 7/11 so you can buy chapstick
But I watch through the window as the cashier hands you a pack of camels from the case behind him
You told me you quit smoking when you met me
Soon its 1 am and you’re leading me to your bed
We’re drunk giggles as you kiss me in the dark
And I try not to think about how it’s been three weeks since you kissed me in the daylight
I wake up with a knotted throat and a sting in my chest because I know you’re going to leave
But oh god,
I wish you would stay
                                                            ­            k.b | *thoughts from your bedroom
it is the beautiful subtleties of persons to which i turn when my heart is most troubled and dripping down my organs like wax:

1. the young man with the leather jacket
and big headphones
when he did me a tiny half-smile
and promptly looked at the sidewalk cracks
(eye contact makes me nervous too)

2. "Larry, you **** close to running into a lady, scoot"
(because a little girl in a backpack
matters to a big farmer in overalls)

3. when the lady with the cats and crooked teeth gave me her first strawberry

4. courtesy laughs for Professor John

5. the old lady at the park (every morning at 9:00) who lets her dog
really
stop and smell the flowers

6. the hug from the smelly, long haired boy
whose car i backed up into
"it's no big deal," he said
(and a girl who didn't like being embraced, loved being embraced)

when the world sinks its teeth into my neck
beautiful unnamed faces flash into my mind
and my atmosphere is clean
and i am brimming with gratitude
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