I am a stone immortal

No work of erosion can seep through my cracks

Like I'm covered by the love of my mother in a Lacquer

Peep the sayings of old world negativities with a nonchalant dilemma

Riding this saddle ***** shrouded and denim and leather

You can not play the game

I will lead myself astray on a road born of dirt and blind footstep

I cannot believe or follow

I cannot fathom colors

I have a non existent black covering my gaze

Still I press

May I rest

The good die young They say

But I'm allergic to living forever

Still I am a stone immortal

Ever crack and every break you make from other stones rocks and pebbles

You will not

You can not

You couldn't even perceive to insist and persist the same or other methods to make me break

For every path that's walked I choose the one that will make me falter and dare I to attack

My stone is immortal with eyes as black as sun

Stick to me like toasted oats
I'll make it burn with poison oak

So believe me when I spit and slur my words to sound

Hear the echo less speech of kings yet to be

Then hear my roar raspy ruffled and deep

I'm a stone who can't see anyone cheap

This stone will attack the unsweeten with its iron side and pile drive

if you want the upper hand

Starve me till my saliva taste early sweet with calories all for me like the best snack or a favorite treat

I'm still the stone immortal see where I can't see the rich or cheap

Let us play a game of chance
You can start the game
It begins with a leap, not a step
But first tell us your name

jump

A hand of chance
That's all this is
A silly game of dares
Maybe a friendly quiz

jump

Now step right up
And don't be shy
I promise we won't bite
Here's a secret (i lie)

JUMP

Lets take a walk
A scenic view
And have a chat
To get to know you

JUMP

This cliff was here
I thought he knew
But he just slipped
Yes officer, his eyes were blue

JUMP

That was the game
The game of chance
And with you gone
I will now advance.

It's a song of pain and of sadness that often comes hand in hand with love; its beat is faltering and ever-changing, matching the pounding in my head and the ringing in my ears. Sometimes I hear your voice, and the way you said you'd regretted almost every part of me is the temporary melody of this new tune. The undertones are constituted of tear drops falling from tear soaked eyelashes, a sound ever so faint but if you'd ever see it happen, it's like an amp overload. I'd like to compare you to myself and put you in this new song - but you're the reason for my hate tonight, and for that, the show will not go on.

country roads
highways
bridges
exhibiting a city in
kinematic frames

to pass
high speed
low speed
lit windows

a kitchen
a tv screen
a bedside lamp
curtains down
nobody's home

cottages
villages
overcrowded districts

dots and dots
each lit window
each turned off light

a story
a me
a us

they

lost
anonimously
as dots
in the distance

forgotten

You have captivated me.
I can feel the ghost of you, holding me tight, making me feel at home.
I dream of you, your flawless face laughing, mine reflecting it.
My thoughts circulate around you & how your ocean eyes hypnotize me.
The phantom of you pulls me in close and tells me sweet nothings.

You have captivated me.
But the real you holds me for only a fraction of a second before you're gone.
My dreams end in nightmare because your holding her instead of me.
My thoughts are struggling to realize the way I look at you will never be returned.
The real you is inconsiderate, a person who cares not about my heart.

And as I ponder all these confusing thoughts, only one truthful thought comes to mind.
I realize that the both of us are in love with someone who will never love us back.

i loved your torn heart
but she lingered on your lips
i couldn't mend it

I won't deny it
If you ask me
Cause we both know it's there
It's plain to see

My feelings altered
A little bit
I think I loved you more
After I ended it...

If I asked,
Would you take me back?
If I asked you to really love me,
Could you manage that?

I don't know how to say this
And now I don't know what to do
I cannot believe I gave you up
Cause I honestly do love you.

So love me please
I'm begging you
This love will grow
I swear it's true

You may not see it,
"You and me"
But I promise
Our love will set you free.

*So let's learn what we can
And do what we must
And instead of "you and me"
We should call it "us"

I remember the day you left me as vividly as yesterday
and how I tried to memorize every detail of your face
when we said goodbye, as if I would never see it again,
because I wasn’t sure if I would be able to live
not being able to remember the person I called my home

I used to think of you as my oxygen,
as tightly-sewn thread,  holding me together,
as a half-finished love story,
you were always something that I swore
I couldn’t live without,
you were always the reason I woke up
every morning feeling brand new,
and I wasn’t even sure life would be worth living
without you

but the clock kept on ticking without you by my side,
and I’m learning to let go, you beautiful creature,
I am still learning,
but one day I will understand
and although my heart still stings when I read your letters,
and even though I feel a pang of emptiness
when the air gets cold and I remember
everything about you,

I am learning how to forget you,
we will always be words left unsaid
but maybe things are better this way
(I will live without you)

When you told me you loved me
I thought that meant every part.
But when I told you I was pregnant
you started choosing which parts deserved
to be loved
and which parts did not.

Everywhere I look, there's an emptiness
where you’re supposed to be.
I told the doctors how I see nothing in everything,
so they prescribed pills to help me see.

My room is always so cold
but your breath was so hot.
I told the doctors I still feel it on my neck
so they gave me more pills to make it stop.

I took the pills for years
but they haven’t helped at all
So I stopped the prescriptions
and started my downward fall.

The doctors will never fully understand
that I will always look for you everywhere I go.
Antidepressants and mood stabilizers are making my mind a
bomb, ready to blow.