All I really want
To do right now
Is quit social media,
Put down my phone,
Perfect my french,
Raise a dog.

Crashing waves
The steady wind
Chirping birds
The wind chimes on our old porch
Sounds of thunder rolling into our small town
The most beautiful noises I can think of.
These are the sounds I hear when I close my eyes.

One sound is missing however.
*I can no longer hear your voice

There's a sorrow for every season,
When you're a target for love's treason.
The bittersweet and twist that's raw,
There is no love without the fall.
Love is gory; tears at the heart,
Never pauses at the start.
You may vow to skip the pain.
One day, you'd die to love again.

In the springtime, love is young.
In the summer, burns in the sun.
In the autumn, hearts may ache.
In the winter, hearts will break.
Once a hopeful, spry young man
Has been haggard by love's hand,
He may vow to skip the pain.
One day, he'd die to love again.

Take the leaf from out the table
The guests have all gone home
Just you and me if we are able
Once again to be alone

The emptiness that's in the silence
Grabs a hold our hearts
Wasn't it love we once relied on
Before alone came to play its part

Place the extra silverware after it's polished
Back inside the bottom drawer
We won't be needing it at all
For at least another year or more

The leftovers that we are left with
Is in not having much to say
About our missing wants and needs
With loneliness being the cutting blade

Make sure to put up all the chairs
Leaving an extra one behind
A seat where silence can sit and stare
At these lost and lonely lives

My affliction , continually weeping for yesterday ! A map with a critical piece missing , an act that continues to repeat , locked within , numerous antagonizing combinations to solve and address , a smiling face given under duress ! Held under water seeking air , walking a tightrope over the portal to Hell ! Defraying the act of suicide every hour three days a week , committing my allegiance to any savior that would have me ..Pills at breakfast , drugs at lunch , ****** up by supper , barely able to walk ! Green pill at seven , white pill at nine ! Five pills at bedtime , up half the night !

Vain I know
I just can't let go
Money that hard to earn
Each day some of it I'd burned

Creating my own clouds
To have strength to join the crowd
When I was a kid, I am too shy
Finally slain my demon of shyness and fly

It started by only feeding my ignorance
Just a single try I've said to my conscience
Seems helping me to have courage in a way
So once, twice, trice until dozen a day

My dear ones begged me to stop
I've tried a lot of times, but I just can't drop
Just like a vampire to blood I crave
To **** the beast of addiction I am not that brave

I am so ****** up now
I am targeting myself with my own bow
A poison I've known from the start
But still I keep it near to my very heart


Written: December 27, 2014

Mysterious Aries

a hand.

my breathing slows
i fight back the throbbing in my forehead

"what's wrong?"

i bury my tear-stained face into his chest
he slides onto the bed
pulls me tight
rubs my back

"it's okay.
it's all okay.
it's okay."

As I look at the faces of other people
Struggling to survive the whirling winds of life
I knew I wasn't special
I'm just a cliche seeking attention
And I'm no special to be treated like one
I am just a little piece of humanity
Significantly living on my own but
Insignificantly existing to the world.

segregated churches
segregated souls
segregated fires
segregated coals

segregated freedom
segregated dreams
segregated whispers
segregated screams

segregated neighbors
segregated homes
segregated doorways
segregated zones

segregated people
segregated minds
segregated signals
segregated signs

segregated graveyards
segregated souls
segregated shovels
dig segregated holes

I wear a white mask
A happy smiling face
A face wherein they couldn't even trace
This darkness in my head temporarily being erase
They praise me everyday
To them I'm good, great in every way
Little they know that I'm only holding back
Without a mask they'll know
Know that my head possessed the biggest crack...


written: july 22, 1014

mysterious aries