I am rotten
I am plagued by my own soul
An anti-Midas causing ****
Everywhere I go.

I am broken
And no one understands
How lonely it feels to put your worth
In everyone else's hands.

I am sorry
If I have ever broken your heart
It makes me feel in control
To keep my barriers up.

I am happy
When I am in your arms
And all the pain it goes away
I'm protected from harm.

I am just me
I'm a wounded complicated thing
Although I may not show it much
I appreciate everything my life brings.

A serenade to the crowd
The applaud white noise to my ears
As I perform to please
To tempt, to tease.

Divine indulgence
A guilty pleasure they seek
I undress myself with grace
I pout, I pose with ease.

Its only art
And baby I play a character so well
A show-stopper
They swoon, but they never tell.

In my oblivion I loved you
Eyes wide, I idolised you.
My boss, my king, my only.
Hold me? Do you love me now?
Do you love me now I'm on my knees howling?
I'm bowing down to you
Cause that's all I know how to do
Darling?
Do you still miss me?
Do I still make you happy like I did that day?
I'm choking on memories
Holding back months of tears
Cause I'm lonely.
You say you want me
But you don't really want me
You just want to own me.
So I stray to feel like my soul is still holy
Cause I have fought myself
For so long now do you see?
So in this endless naivety I'll keep you
But you'll never own me darling.
You'll never own me.

My mind is full of tirades
A tempest fills my brain
I've lost a part of myself in love before
How gullible I've been.
Would you rather I pour my heart out?
Spill my passion let me bleed?
I apologise. **** myself in front of your eyes.
Take off my mask so you can see where my vulnerability lies.

I crashed into the room
My eyes red from the tears
My mascara heading south
My mind away with the fairies
You rolled me up
And smoked me
Like the world
Wanted you out
Cause I am just your ******
Soon there will be another girl.

You said one minute I was happy
Next minute I’m coming down
I was never really hungry
Cause I kept you on my mouth
You stayed clean for a while
Until you needed me again
Cause I was just your ******
And you stubbed me out back then.

And a few months later
You ask me how I've been
I say I've been ******* great
Although lying is a sin
No I'm not sure if
I’ll ever see you again
Cause you moved on from your legals
Yeah you moved onto 'Mandy'.

My trail of thought left with the train in the distance
Do not disturb my blissful ignorance
Because it's a long way to jump from here
Adrenaline rushing through a tunnel of thoughts
As tangled as a tube map
I stand at the crossroads of my life
Mindlessly dodging traffic.

The sadness came like a car crash
The hope of the open road and blue skies
Overcame with rain and darkness.
The kind of sadness that tears through your chest
Like the seatbelt saving you is all you have left.

There's a kind of fantasy
In the immortality of memories
Where I remain
In a glass frame
Caged in youth
I age by the day.

A fond departure my dear
In the winds I linger
Not by your hands I leave
But by your heart I remain.

A bitter departure my dear
In your thoughts I linger
By your words I leave
But in your memories I remain.