I'm so scared.
When will it finally stop?
How am I really supposed to feel?
Where must I look to truly find it?
For those who ask
Love is like nicotine.
Once you've tried it once, you can't get enough.
You say you can live without it.
But you know you're lying to yourself.
That's why heartbreak physically hurts.
The way withdrawals physically hurt.
It makes you sick to your stomach.
You say it's the last time.
But it's not.
It's the final act, for now.
You can try to take a long break from it.
But it always comes slithering back.
Like a shadow you can't hide from.
You can't stop thinking about it.
You sit through your normal life.
Thinking about when your next fix is.
It fills your lungs and makes you feel good.
But shortly after you feel it in your stomach.
Like a poison slowly killing you.
Nicotine is like love.
Love, or lack thereof, can hurt
(read it all backward now)
I think you take my breath away.
People always say that as an endearing thing.
But I think you actually physically take my breath away.
I don't know how.
Maybe it was when you layed your head on my chest.
Or tangled your fingers with mine.
Or felt safe enough to drift off to sleep in my arms.
All I know is that I think you take my breath away.
I just wish I was surer of you.
Because I want that feeling for eternity.
But I don't think you are my eternity.
For those who know what it feels like
You make me feel like the man I've always aspired to be,
And the little, scared kid I used to always be.
At first, I wasn't sure,
Too much running through my head.
But once we were there on your couch,
Sharing warmth and asylum.
My heart raced like it hadn't in years,
My mind going a thousand miles an hour.
Once you fit your hands in mine,
And curled up beside me.
It felt safe and natural,
Like we had been here before.
Your genuine smile and cute laugh,
At every terrible joke I made.
Your smell remained on my left shoulder sleeve,
And your phantom fingers softly brushing.
It all felt natural.
It all felt right.
At least for tonight.
For those falling somewhere for someone
Skin like flowing flames
Eyes like infernos
Lips that make you spill every drop of your desires
Soft sharp fingers brushing sins into your soul
A voice like boiling honey
Promises of wild fantasies
Contracts in blood
All tricks of the Devil himself
For the curious sinners
How do you put such profound emotions into words?
Do you paint them onto the page like a gentle brush swooping and sliding?
Do you shout them from the stage into an audience of frightened eyes?
Do you quickly write them down with a stern ballpoint scratching into blank paper?
Do you whisper them softly into curious ears with gentle and intimate intention?
Do you scream them at your memories till your throat burns?
Or do you silently stare at the sky and think them into the abyss?
Don't get coffee.
Don't kiss her.
Don't fall in love.
Don't think about her every moment.
Don't let those blue eyes pierce your soul like they have time and time again.
Don't let those lips poison your mind with the stinging venom of her serpent heartstrings.
Don't do it again expecting something to change with a happily ever after.
Don't convince yourself that you're done falling.
Don't think for a second it's over.
Don't forget it's just starting again.
Fall in love.
The last time.
For the confused and in love. But hey, what's the difference?