Now that I have begun to heal
I do not want to remember
The heartache you made me feel
Those cold days in December

Tonight I am destined to fail
Mind will take me back
The concrete wall surrounding
My fragile heart will crack

Memories will trickle out,
One moment after the other
I will try to make them go away
They're too strong to smother

I have hidden them for far too long
In your quiet presence they awaken
Reminding me that I cannot have
Back pieces you have taken

All this time I have avoided
Mention of your name
Because I will not allow myself
To fall again into your game

Every once in awhile
I forget that you are a liar
It slips my distracted mind how dangerous
It is to play with burning fire

Hear a maybe in my head
Feel a little flicker of what we had
I reminisce about how it once was
Before our relationship went bad

I should know better
I see through your disguise
A master of illusion
You have one billion alibis

So tell me that you have changed
You're sorry you didn't stay
But do not expect me to believe
You're as different as you say

I could not handle all the hurt
Although you bring laughter
Because I finally realize with you
There is no such thing as "happily-ever-after"

Our love formed in unsaid words, sideways glances,
Constellations born into insecure eyes,
My toes touch yours, stomach performs flips,
A tingle runs up and down my anticipating thighs.

Fearing what feelings mean,
Time causing them to grow strong,
Chaos is where we both were raised,
Seems like every plan goes wrong.

Attraction is more powerful than doubt,
Hungrily, our sights devour beauty unique,
Howling in silence, hunting lust,
Guessing what unspoken hopes we're scared to speak.

-You are an afternoon blizzard of inspiration,
Breaking down walls without a single touch,
I no longer try to repair or rebuild them,
Bricks fall to pieces when held in your clutch.

In every way changed my life for the better,
If willing I'll share with you thoughts in my head,
Thank you for taking your heart out of your chest,
And trusting me to carry it instead.

Know you'd be better without me here
Make it harder for you to adhere
To goals, one thing is clear
The "us" we are sober is what we fear
Hold you dear, love who you are
Treat you bad, keep you far
Further than the most distant star
Scared to hurt you and leave a scar
Hurt you and I don't know why
It doesn't matter how hard I try
Only make things worse for you and I
When will you call it quits and say goodbye?

HOOK:
Try to make it right but I always do you wrong
Say I will change but taking far too long
You're sick of hearing me sing the same song
Can we turn this back around, or are you already gone?

Most of the time wish I was someone else
Try my best to be happy, it never seems to help
You always tell me to be myself
I'm not good enough, that is easy to tell
I will never understand what you see in me
You think I am amazing, I disagree
I am drowning, dragging you into my sea
My life a mess dark and ugly
Two words I shout sometimes "Go away!"
Off-guard, you can't find the right words to say
The same day, ask you please stay
Must be hard to love a girl who never is okay
When this ends will you miss me like you said?
Travel across oceans to be by my side again?
I touch you in all the right spots in my bed
But could never let you see inside my head

HOOK

Your soul is inspiring, balanced, real
I left old pain behind, wanted to heal
Your trembling hands decided to steal
Aching thoughts and unease I no longer feel
Just like a magician you put my pieces back into place
Anticipation filling the gaps and leftover space
I am starting to think I'll win this race
Is this only a dream? Will I wake with no trace?
If we are really here right now let me know
Leave me with a reminder to hold when you go
Lately my mind likes to bounce to and fro
One second feeling high, the next feeling low

HOOK

That's when it finally hit me
That was the exact moment I knew
We were really over and I
Didn't mean anything to you

You returned my old sleeping bag
Along with my bicycle and t-shirt
I know that's what I asked of you
But I had no idea how much it would hurt

To see my stuff outside my house
Waiting for me to carry it in
There is nothing left of me in your room
Guess it's done and now you win

You did not have to hear my voice
Or see my face, you just handed my
Belongings to a friend we have in common
He was nice enough to bring them by

You wanted it to be quick and easy
Painless, at the end of the day
I bet you thought it through and concluded
It would be better this way

These wounds they are not healing
Remain like cracks in a concrete wall
All I am yearning for is closure
I look and nothing's closed at all