"relized" poems
WHEN I WAS WITH YOU THATS WHEN I RELIZED HOME WASN'T A PLACE, BUT A FEELING.
NOW YOU'RE GONE I'M SUDDENLY HOMELESS.
(j.a)
Feb 2, 2015
Feb 2, 2015 at 7:34 AM UTC
From the beginning I trusted you, but in end I rejected you
Because the demons inside shined bright in the night
Sadly, we only hung out at night...
When your world was already dizzy
Mine was too busy to understand the reasons why
So my mind decided that a marathon was stunning
I only thought of you but it managaed to keep running
In this case 28 k but seemed like 28 days
Becuase as you know you just dont run the race
Theres many days of planning and exercise just in case
Now, my heart beats out of rythem
Becuase of the precision of your desicion
Your words seemed kind but in my mind I knew that they hurt
Like you grabbed my heart, played with it, put it back and left it in parts
Since then my left atrium doesnt work
Its like a inncoent whale that was left to die in the beach dirt
And i was simply that... innocent dirt
What had I done previous to this that made you act outrageous?
But now I know your contagious
A disease that brings you one step closer death
But now im just once step closer to home I guess
Home. A intanglment of feeling like the fibers in my sheets
I thought it was a place of love but then relized its just a place to meet
My mother was a weird one. Often pressing burdens on her son
A seperated family with nothing in commom is definatly more common then Nostradomeous
To say I love quotes would be close but theres some that make me simply choke
Remember when "like father like son" was an inpiration quote but for me its what kept me a float
On the sea of hatred with the destination of dope
Becuase of the words my mother chose, addiction would be my affliction
A state of pain my mother, father, sister and brother could not feel
Yes, this is the shittest deal, but look at me now
A person ontop with the world as my partner,
Ambition like a morning light because I had the will to fight
Only you can make a change your life, not your mother, drugs and neither your wife.
Sep 19, 2013
Sep 19, 2013 at 4:04 PM UTC
*You called me your guiding star
That's quite true.
I burnt myself
and risked my whole existence
Just to light you way
For a few second*
*You called me your anchor
That's quite true
I sunk myself
To keep you at one place*
*You compared me with the moon
I get it now why
I scarred myself for life
just to be noticed,
To stand out
from the darkness
all around me*
I gave you my all,
'cause i thought i could be your all
I tried to fix you
ignoring how in the process
I almost bled myself to death
*I swallowed shards of glass
and yet never let my smile falter*
**I Wiped Your Tears
While Mine Were Left Abandoned
To Dry On Their Own**
I tried healing your wounds
while mine got deeper
And I swear
I tried my best
To spare our friendship
Losing my love was bad enough
but my best friend too?
How on Earth
was i supposed to get through this
So,
I stayed
Put on my daily show
but you knew me
too well to fall for that facade
And that's whAT hurt most
**the warmth in your eyes
that once felt like home
sheltering me from world's cold ways
was now gone
replaced
replaced by this coldness**
*Your skin
was the only home i ever knew
but i realized,
i was not welcome any more*
And I relized that
that hardest way possible
yet i stayed
'cause i just could not leave
I did not know how to leave
I loved you so frigging much
and everything just kept getting worse
YOU WERE NO LONGER THE SUN
but a blackhole
swallowing all the good memories
devouring them all
till there was not a trace of light
inside me
till there was nothing left to me
till i became the ghost
of the girl who i used to be
And all those good days
they seem like a distant dream
and i don't even know if what i'm writing
makes any sense
my hands won't stop shaking
or my head shouting
it keeps yelling
YOU NEVER FELL FOR ME
YOU SLIPPED
UNKNOWINGLY
A MISTAKE'YOU REGRET EVERY DAY
Sep 13, 2014
Sep 13, 2014 at 2:58 PM UTC
she came from a broken home, wasn't to ambitious
and the fact she was loose was surreptitious
she did this to make up for what her childhood lacked
so she picked dudes up and droped them quick like jacks
so it wasn't surprising that after a while
her abdomen became an embryo's domicile
she didn't want it but her parents weren't pro-choice
she might as well have had strep throat, had no vocie
her days were then filled with insults down right explict
all this for just one unsurpervised visit
after nine months of the tribulations of misogyny
it was time to bring forth her progeny
after a few ardous hours she gave birth
to a girl which suprisingly filled her with mirth
she relized she had something to live for
and she promised to give her
everything she need and to not let anything encumber
her daughter's success as she watched her slumber
she named her rose because she if it took till the world's doom
she would nuture this child untill she finally blooms
Nov 4, 2014
Nov 4, 2014 at 1:56 PM UTC
I found myself wandering
through a woods near my home
and I relized that I
for once
started to feel alone
Like the leaves beneath my feet
the rustle was just there
both things present yes,
but neither I really cared
As my walk continued
I stumbled upon a creek
a beautiful blissful babbeler
Winding through the trees
to me it seemed that it was a sight
that few before me had seen
I only wished I had someone
besides the leaves beneath my feet
to share a place so beautiful and so discrete...
The trees they mocked me
each branch had many more
to share the blissful sight
of and eagle taking a soar
and every step further that I took
I realized even more
That loneliness digs deeper
Then your deepest inner core
I've wandered through this woods
Since many years ago
and though I've tried to find someone
no one really knows
what started as just a thought
has consumed where I go
Now I truly understand what it's like to be alone.
Nov 7, 2014
Nov 7, 2014 at 3:11 PM UTC
"I was once a rose who layed dying in the shadows
While all the others bloomed with beauty
I wanted what they had
Then one day a bright light shined down on me
At first I did not know what it was
Then I relized it was your love
Before I knew it I was blooming into a beautiful rose
I am who I am today thanks to you
I love you."
May 15, 2012
May 15, 2012 at 2:16 PM UTC
Standing in the wind
wishing I could start agian,
but yet
I relize I can't.
I try to get up, or move, or walk,
but yet
I relize I can't.
Now they come to
terrorize me agian.
They grab me by the arm
and take me away once more.
But yet,
I dont undersand why.
They take me underground
to see their high master.
So they can decide my fate once more.
He took one look,
and smiled his evil smile,
and told the gaurds
to do the extreme to me.
I cry,scream, and try to tear my way out,
but only in my mind.
Because i relize
if I did it outloud,
I would surely die.
But yet,
something still came out
of my mouth once more.
Now the king
told them to do the extreme
plus more.
Now I've done it.
I've killed myself today.
I will not be able
to breath or live for another day.
They take me away
to where they will **** me today.
So now I wait
for my fate to come,
and start to pray.
They start to beat me,
and throw me agianst the rocks.
But I relize,
I do not feel any pain.
I feel strength growing
in my arms
and start to think
I can live another day.
But before they hit me agian,
a light shines.
It takes away
every drop of darkness
in the world.
A person comes down,
tells me to stand back,
and starts to fight
agianst them.
They flee in fright,
because of what is in their sight.
I really dont know why they ran,
but yet
I relize I didn't see the face of the man.
He turned around
and I instantly relized
this wasn't any ordinary man.
This was the lord, my savior,
the ruler of the light.
I could not beleive my sight.
He takes my hand,
and asks me to walk with him.
Then he takes me
out of here
to never go back agian.
He lifts me free,
and I am forever faithfull to him.
He takes me to his kingdom
where I am forever free.
To walk
and talk
and live worry free.
I can finally be in a greatfull peace.
I reize now,
I can finally start agian once more.
Mar 18, 2013
Mar 18, 2013 at 5:52 PM UTC
one time someone said a gruesome thing to me
"i swear to god i will slit you open and drag
you up and down my street by your entrails"
people have told me to
**** yourself, your not worth the space"
"fat cow"
"worthless"
and I froze up with fear
from the hostility
and I thought
"Where has our humanity gone"
And I relized
We lost it with our sisters and brothers over seas
with the violence
on our TV's
with the routine crime
in our cities and saying
"its just how it is"
our humanity has been bread out
and society has created
shells of once humans
Feb 6, 2014
Feb 6, 2014 at 1:34 AM UTC
She was just sitting there cigarette between her fingers
The smoke curling up above her head, it lingered
She was just contemplating the universe, and her place in it
She felt like a round peg trying to be pushed into a square hole, she just didn't fit
She was far more beautiful than she knew and her spirit was a wonderful kind of wild
Her loving generosity was always reflected in her gorgeous smile
It was heart breaking that it was not flashed more often
But what else would you expect when all of her dreams had died and had all but been forgotten
Her Grandma had taught her as a small child of a loving, caring God
She inhaled deeply from her cigarette and thought if He was so loving why had He only punished her with the rod
She exhaled and let the smoke rise above her, maybe her Grandma had been wrong
Her faith was waning because of all she had lived through all she had seen, her faith was almost gone
She snuffed out her cigarette, stood up and took a long look around
She was completely alone, her broken heart beat was the only sound
Her eye's was filled with the tears of a lifetime of pain, anger and sorrow
She was terrified of the uncertain future and what was to follow
If only she had relized how many other's lifes she had touched and changed
She had so many times sacrificed of herself, let her life be rearranged
She had that rare type of heart that could always see past the surface, to see their lost beautiful soul
What an agonizing tragedy she was blinded to her own amazing, loving, unselfish beautiful soul; she just didn't know
Jan 29, 2016
Jan 29, 2016 at 7:08 PM UTC
I was so very proud of my wall
I knew no collision would make it fall
It was built over many a year with heartache & grief
And many a secrets I'm destined to keep
I built the wall to keep all those out
If I found any holes I'd fill them with grout
Thought the pain couldn't reach me
And I might get to find some glee
But little did I know what I'd done to myself
Seems I've just been sitting on a shelf
And letting life just pass right by
And I was just watching and waving goodbye
I relized I was still miserable in my safe little hole
Gezz something, yes something had to go
My wall is so high it's blocking the sun
But what,oh what, could be done
Seems that I walled in the pain, instead of keeping it out
WHAT HAVE I DONE, I scream and I shout
I'm so looking for someone to throw me a line
To save me from this space and time
There was one that dared to throw me a life vest
And **** it he tried his very, very best
But this wall of mine put our friendship to the test
And I know now I must give him some rest
So I start with forgiving myself
But there's a lot that should be on someone else
The guilt shouldn't be mine
It was their crime!!!
So I pick up my axe and start chipping away
Because behind this wall I no longer want to stay
I want to break free of this jail that I built
And work thru all this emotionally guilt
It really wasn't mine to claim
anyway
So I'll try my hardest to keep those feelings at bay
I'm tired of staying here in this life of gray
So I'll keep chipping and chopping and maybe one day......
Mar 21, 2016
Mar 21, 2016 at 10:57 AM UTC
You took more then you'll ever know
Everyday it crosses my mnd
I hope it will get better with time But I still see it in my mind
If im honest
It means I lied
Being 6 years old
How was I post to know
19 years
Before I relized it wasnt fair
See I was just a kid with messy hair
You told me to pull down my underware
It wasnt just you
And i wish it wasnt true
I was taken advantage of even after you
Sick to my stomach
I couldnt hold it
Crying all night
Putting up a fight
Didnt want to close my eyes
Just incase it was you I saw tonight
This feeling Im feeling isnt right
I hope one day I can sleep threw the night
Jan 21, 2015
Jan 21, 2015 at 2:29 PM UTC
You almost left me here all alone
Then you thought and relized
That i was a reson to stay...
Then you tried again
Told me before hand got me worried
I told people that could help you
Now your mad
So i live with the fact we can never
truly be who we were again
this all happened about a year ago
although i help you threw a lot you
of witch you might ignore
but me i still remember and i don't think i can forget
like you did just because you shut me out but that is all in the past they all say they say that it is all okay now but if only they new the point of what you were going though that you just decided that you would just leave me pretending that you are okay but i know that deep down inside that you are not quite where you say you are i know this because i know you
Apr 24, 2018
Apr 24, 2018 at 9:30 PM UTC
We live a life were..
Kids are distracted from crying by phones
A little kid knows the moms password be for he can speak
Were kids instead of going outside
We'll they'd rather stay in,
Playing on Facebook or Twitter
Whatever that is.
And I'll admit I spend some of my time
On my Facebook doing nothing
But scrolling down.
Being board
When we all could go out and bike
Or skate, or take a walk
When instead of useing our phones
Witch is a trapped society in its own
We could ask a stranger for directions
We could use what god has given us
It's called speech and our hands
Use the words you know
Or the hands to sign.
Put the phone and the laptops down
Take in the relization
That there's a world to be descoverd
Look at the sky and listen to the birds
Not saying musice is bad becase I'm **** to say it's something I love
But putting it aside the other day
I relized just how much I missed..
Just being out side.
Yea......
This is our society
We can always change it
But not unless we want to
So instead of haveing your musice in
Or being on Facebook
Or twitter or other media sites
Go be with a Frieand
Go for a walk and talk
Like when you were 10
Playing out side on the playground
Amazing your never to old for that :)
Don't listen to the haters
Belive in what you want and go have a good time with some Frieands
I know our parents always Say stranger danger
But howed you get to know the kids you call friends now?
Good luck out there and smile tomorrow's a new day it isent over.
Aug 3, 2014
Aug 3, 2014 at 1:23 AM UTC
She was just sitting there cigarette between her fingers
The smoke curling up above her head, it lingered
She was just contemplating the universe, and her place in it
She felt like a round peg trying to be pushed into a square hole, she just didn't fit
She was far more beautiful than she knew and her spirit was a wonderful kind of wild
Her loving generosity was always reflected in her gorgeous smile
It was heart breaking that it was not flashed more often
But what else would you expect when all of her dreams had died and had all but been forgotten
Her Grandma had taught her as a small child of a loving, caring God
She inhaled deeply from her cigarette and thought if He was so loving why had He only punished her with the rod
She exhaled and let the smoke rise above her, maybe her Grandma had been wrong
Her faith was waning because of all she had lived through all she had seen, her faith was almost gone
She snuffed out her cigarette, stood up and took a long look around
She was completely alone, her broken heart beat was the only sound
Her eye's was filled with the tears of a lifetime of pain, anger and sorrow
She was terrified of the uncertain future and what was to follow
If only she had relized how many other's lifes she had touched and changed
She had so many times sacrificed of herself, let her life be rearranged
She had that rare type of heart that could always see past the surface, to see their lost beautiful soul
What an agonizing tragedy she was blinded to her own amazing, loving, unselfish beautiful soul; she just didn't know
May 10, 2016
May 10, 2016 at 2:21 PM UTC
If only you would have opened your eyes...
You would have relized how much you hurt the people who loved you.
But you had to go and do it.
Why did you have to go and **** your self.
If only you opened your eyes and see you were loved by many.
Open your eyes and come back to us.
Don't leave us like the way you tried before.
You were loved by many why did you have to leave.
You left behind many people who would have helped you.
We could have been there when you needed us the most.
But now that I look back you did try and call us by your side but we never heard.
When you call for help make sure we hear just keep calling and we will come to you.
But now I open my eyes.
I see man you could have been grown to be.
The man who could have saved millions.
The man who could have helped save lives.
The man who would have been the one for me.
Apr 23, 2013
Apr 23, 2013 at 4:25 PM UTC
The sky, it holds the sun.
The sun, it wears a smile.
The smile, it spills the happiness. Happiness that I do not have.
So you see, the sky has betrayed me as my skin has, and along with it the perish of my soul.
My spirit had fallen when I was betrayed by friends. When I relized I was on my own.
The pain that creeps around in my heart is due to all the lies said, all the pictures leaked, and the friends that have turned their back because of rumors.
Those I thought I could trust broke it in an instant. That instant when no meant yes. That moment when my world flipped.
Close family that I relied on showed me that we will become nothing. No one ever has. Not here.
Boys taught me how to be careful. How to be cautiouse. I learn from my mistakes right? What if it wasn't my mistake. Of course it was though. I trusted people. I let them in. That is a mistake I will never make again.
My heart. It beats. But it doesn't have a reason too. It has too many reasons to stop. And maybe it should. Maybe my breathing should. And my pulse. Maybe my whole life.
But I turn back and relize that is not an option. Because no one will let me go.
Jul 7, 2017
Jul 7, 2017 at 2:15 AM UTC
You never did
I never tried
And together
we relized
surely realized
that we were never meant
to be seen by
lovers naked eyes
No
If you could
please leave a photograph of your face on your way out
Just so I can cherish before my eyes grow dim
I painted half of my face blue and the other red
Now I have to lay in the bed I've made
Don't you love me
Won't you love me
before my eyes grow dim
Dec 24, 2023
Dec 24, 2023 at 11:05 PM UTC
I don't know how to feel some times
It's like your trapped between 2 choices. Me and her. You love me but your minds on her some times. And when your mad or upset you don't think of the things you say you just think that nobody actually gives a ahit. I wish you could see everything that Roman didn't destroy I gave you. You have my everything. My life is in your hands you fall I fall. You have problem s going on I get it.
My family dose drugs my sister was in jail on my 18th birthday for being involves with the her I on epademic. I get bullyed everyday on social media. I get told to shut the **** up. Or that I'm stupid or my ma tell me **** you every single day. I feel fat and ugly everyday. I hate that I have a stomach I hate that I where glasses I hate me. I taught my self how to be alone. I delt with my dad ****** my sister my step dad beating my sisters(there bio dad) for talking to me. Watched my mom get beat. I watch my mom get taken from me watched my dad get taken from me... I tired to **** my self and had to lie about so I didn't get sent away so I could try again. I used to sleep on a couch in the living room. I was almost ***** when I was 8 again when I was 13 and I was ***** when I was 16 a sphmore in highschool. Fell for a cheating *** whole cause I craved love and *** I draw to get ride of the pain. I lost a son when I was 14. While my best friend that was pregnant with hers got to keep them. I gave you my everything after that 1St date which is why I never told him that I loved him after that day. Cause I relized eventually that I don't love him. I don't. I love you. I see a future. I see us having a place of our own. I see us getting married and me being yours forever I see us traveling. I see me and you. Baby I gave you my soul.... I love you. And will always love you. I get that your going threw hell. I get your scared of love. I am too. But babe we gotta learn to husle together. Be together and how to help each other. Babe please know that I do love you. Please know I love you for who you are. I want to be an us. Your my strangthe. With out you I don't have my heart.
Dec 26, 2017
Dec 26, 2017 at 1:47 AM UTC
I had a dream
I was a beautiful machine
with nuts and bolts so silver they gleamed
My craftsmanship was perfect I was stunned
Now walking into to crowds I wasn’t shunned
Other machines talking to me via code
But at the end of the day my switch was turned to off mode
I felt as each contraption buzzed then paused
and then I relized being surrounded my a dozen robots
I was lost
My metal plates screamed in agony as I lost control of me
The nuts and bolts came lose and I tumbled
to the ground
A heap of junk I was to be called but the other robots just stood
and watched as I struggled for fuel
help me I screamed as if they could
but they just stood
and stood
Jun 1, 2018
Jun 1, 2018 at 11:31 AM UTC
Frames of sky fell with tempers rise.
Is it the heat that is reside.
Or a plant, of sheet of paper.
Tether holes too a pole of height.
The women with a new car walked into a mall.
She is to buy a dress her new boy friend is a victory fan.
So as prepared steps move across a wood floor.
Cracks begin to form on all walls beckon your here at least for now lilly.
She looks as bashful as a giggle girl.
What," what just is it that makes him glee in passion.
Her heart then shifts gears for him and his sports.
Aim, well when you dance your toes never should turn away.
She looks in a pause menu way.
In what''s your meaning epic being of space.
Im saying look at your goals with honor you shall become successful make all become relized.
When you throw a sheet over a mess you then notice the bump in your few.
So choose the best course for your year need's better flow.
You are my prime model I made in details.
Well of fortune will become sticks of gold.
So cut the lesh and let him go because your a prize of ten fold better than even gold coal or molds.
Aug 16, 2017
Aug 16, 2017 at 12:46 AM UTC