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1.

From our
safe windows,
we crane our necks,
rubbernecking
past the slow
motion wreckage
unfolding in Homs.

We remain
perfectly
perched
to marvel at
the elegant arc of
a mortar shell
framing tomorrows
deep horizon,
whistling through
the twilight to
find its fruitful
mark.

In the now
we keep
complicit time,
to the arrest
of beating hearts,
snapping fingers
to the pop
of rifle cracks,
swooning to
the delicious
intoxication of
curling smoke
lofting ever
upward;
yet
thankfully
remain
distant
enough to
recuse any
possibility
of an
intimate
nexus
with the
besieged.

2.

From our
safe windows,
we behold the
urgent arrivals of
The Friends of Syria
demanding
clean sheets
and 4 Star
room service at a
Tunisian Palace
recently cleaned
and under new
management
promising a
much needed
refurbishment.

The gathered,
a clique of
this epochs
movers and shakers,
a veritable
rouges gallery of
ambassadorial
prelates, Emirs and
state department
bureaucrats
summoned
with portfolio
from the
darkest corners
of the globe.

They are
eager to
sanctify
the misery
of Homs,
deflect and
lay blame
with realpolitik
rationalizations,
commencing
official commissions
of inquiry,
deliberating
grave considerations,
issuing indictments
of formal charges for
Crimes Against
Humanity
while
remaining
urgently
engrossed
in the fascination
of interviewing
potential
process servers
to deliver the bad news
to Bashar al-Assad
and his soulless
Baathist
confederates,
if papers
are to be
served.

Yes, the diplomats
are busy meeting
in closed rooms.

In hushed circles
they whisper
into aroused ears,
railing against
Russia’s
gun running
intransigence
and China’s
geopolitical
chess moves.

Statesmen
boast of the
intrepid justice
of tipping points
and the moving poetry
of self serving tales,
weighing the impact
of stern sanctions
amidst the historical
confusion of the
asymmetrical
symmetries
of civil war.

Caravans
of Arab League
envoys roll up
in silver Bentleys,
crossing deserts
of contradictory
obfuscations,
navigating the
endless dunes
with hand held
sextants of
hidden agendas.

The heroic
Bedouins are
eager to offload
their baggage
and share
on the ground
intelligence from
their recent soirées
across Syria.

They beg
a quick fix,
the triage of a
critical catharsis
to bleed their
brains dry
of heinous
recollections,
pleading
release from a
troubled conscience
victimized by
the unnerving paradox
of reconciling
discoveries of
perverse voyeurism
with the sanctioned
explanations
of their respective
ruling elites.

The bellies
of these
scopophiliacs
are distended;
grown queasy
from a steady diet
of malfeasance
an ulcerated
world parades
in continuous loop;
spewing the raw feeds
of real time misery;
forcibly fed
the grim
visions of
frantic
fathers
rushing
the mangled
carcases
of mortally
wounded
children
to crumpled
piles of smashed
concrete that were
once hospitals.

We despondently
ask how
much longer
must we
look into
the eyes
of starving
children
emaciated from
the wanton
indifference
of the world?


3.

From our
safe windows
we wonder
how much
longer can
the urgent
burning
ambivalence
continue
before it
consumes
our common
humanity in
a final
conflagration?

My hair already
singed by the
endless firestorms
sweeping the prairies
of the world.

How can we survive
the trampling hoards,
the marauding
plagues of acrimony
fed by a voracious
blood lust aspiring to
victimize the people
of Homs and a
thousand cities
like it?


4.

From my safe
window I stand in witness
to the state execution of
refugees fleeing the
living nightmare
of Baba Amr.

The ****** of innocents,
today's newly minted martyrs,
women and children
cornered, trapped
on treacherous roads,
mercilessly
slaughtered and
defiled in death
to mark the lesson
of a ruthless master
enthralled with the
power of his
sadistic fascist
lordship.

I cannot avert my eyes
marking sights
of pleading women
begging for the
lives of their children
in exchange for
the gratification
of a sadists
lust.

My heart
is impaled
on the sharp
spear of
outrage
beholding
careening
children mowed
down with the
serrated blades
protruding
from marauding
jeeps of laughing
soldiers.

I drop
to my knees
in lakes of
tears
reflecting
a grotesque
horror stricken
image of myself.

My eyes have
murdered my soul.

The ghastly images
of Homs have chased
away my Holy Ghost
to the safety of a child's
sandbox hidden away
in a long forgotten
revered memory.


5.

From my safe window
I seethe with anger
demanding vengeance,
debating how to rise
to meet the obscenity of
the Butcher of Damascus.

The sword of Damocles
dangles so tantalizingly close
to this tyrants throat.  

The covered women
of Homs scream prayers
“may Allah bring Bashar to ruin”

Dare I pray
that Allah trip the
horsehair trigger
that holds the
sword at bay?

Do I pick up
the sword
a wield it
as an
avenging
angel?

Am I the
John Brown
of our time?

Do I organize
a Lincoln Brigade
and join the growing
leagues of jihadists
amassing at the
Gates of Damascus?

Will my righteous
indignation fit well
in a confederacy
with Hamas and
al-Qaeda as my
comrades in arms?

Do I succumb to
the passion of hate
and become just
another murderous
partisan, or do I
commend the power
of love and marshal
truth to speak with
the force of
satyagraha?

I lift a fervent prayer
to claim the justice
of Allah’s ear,
“may the knowing one
lift the veil of foolishness
that covers my heart in
cloaks of resent, cure
my blindness that ignores
my raging disease of
plausible deniability
ravaging the body politic
of humanity.”

6.

Indeed,
physician heal thyself.

I run to embrace my
illness.

I pine to understand it.

I undertake the
difficult regimen
of a cure to eradicate
the terrible affliction.

This
pernicious
plague,
subverting
the notion
of a shared
humanness
is a cunning
sedition that
undermines
the unity of
the holy spirit.  

The bell from
the toppled steeples
still tolls, echoing
across the space of
continents and eons
of temporal time.

The faithful chimes
gently chides us
to remove the wedge
of perception that
separates, divides
and undermines.

Time has come
to liberally
apply the balm
that salves the
open wounds
so common to
our common
human condition.

The power of prayer
is the joining of hands
with others racked
with the common
affliction of humanness.

Allah,  
My eyes are wide open,
my sacred heart revealed,
my sleeves are rolled up,
my memory is stocked,
my soul filled with resolve,
my hand is lifted
extended to all
brothers and sisters.
Lift us,
gather us
into one
loving embrace.

Selah


7.

From the safe
windows of
our palaces
we live within
earshot of
the trilling
zaghroutas
of exasperation
flowing from
the besieged
city smouldering
under Bashar’s
symphony of terror.

Our nostrils
fill with the
acrid plumes
of unrequited
lamentations
lifting from the
the burning
destruction
of shelled
buildings.

Our eyes spark
from the night
tracers
of sleeking
snipers
flitting along
the city’s
rooftops.

The deadly jinn
indiscriminately
inject the
paralysis of
random fear
into the veins
of the city
with each
skillful
head shot.

These
ghoulish
assassins
lavish in their
macabre work;
like vultures
they eagerly
feast on the
corpses of their ****,
the stench of bloated
bodies drying in the
sun is the perfume
that fills their nostrils.


8.

From our
safe window
we discern the
silhouettes of militants
still boldly standing
amidst the
mounting rubble of an
unbowed Homs
shouting;

Allah Akbar!!!
Allah Akbar!!!
Allah Akbar!!!

raising pumped fists,
singing songs
of resistance,
dancing to
the revelation of
freedom,
refusing to
be coward by
the slashing
whips of a
butchers
terrible
sword.


9.

From my
safe window
my tongue laps
the pap
of infants
suckling from
the depleted
teats of mothers
who cannot cry
for their dying
children;
tears fail
to well from
the exhaustion
of dehydrated
pools.

10.

From my
safe window
my heart stirs
to the muezzin
calling the
desperate faithful
from the toppled
rubble of dashed
minarets.

We can
no longer
shut our ears
to the adhan
of screams
the silent
voices that echo
the blatant injustice
of a people under siege.


11.

From my
safe window,
I pay
Homage to Homs
and call brothers
and sisters to rise
with vigilant
insistence
that hostilities
cease and
humanity be
upheld,
respected and
protected.


12.

From my safe
window
I perceive
the zagroutas
of sorrow
manifest as a
whiling hum,
a sweeping
blue mist,
levitating
the coffins
from the rubble
of ravaged streets.

The swirling
chorus of
mourning
joins my
desperate
prayers;
rising in
concert
with the
black billows
of smoke
dancing
away
from the
flaming
embers
of scorched
neighborhoods.


13.

From my
safe window
I heed
the fluttering
wings
of avenging
angels
furiously
batting
as they
climb
the black
plumes,
lifting from
the scattered bricks
of the desecrated
city.

It is the
Jacob’s
Ladder
for our
time;
marking
a new
consecrated
place
where
a New Adam
is destined
to be formed
from the
pulverized
stones of
desolation.

14.

From our
safe windows
we peer into
resplendent
mirrors
beholding
the perfect image of
ourselves
eying
falling tears
dripping blood,
coloring death
onto the
blanched sheets
of disheveled beds.


15.

From our
safe windows
our voices are silenced,
our words mock urgency
our thoughts betray comprehension
our senses fail to illicit empathy
our action is the only worthy prayer


16.

From my
safe window
I hear the
mortar shells
walking toward
my little palace,
the crack
of a ******
shot
precedes
the wiz of a
passing bullet
whispering
its presence
into my
waxen
ear.


17.

From my
safe window,
my palms scoop
the rich soil
of the flower boxes
perched on my sill.
I anoint the tender
green shoots of  the
Arab Spring
with an incessant flow
of bittersweet tears.

Music selection:
John Coltrane
A Love Supreme
Acknowledgment

Oakland
2/28/12
jbm
ClawedBeauty101 Nov 2017
October, 27, 2017 (Friday)*

Flying down the open empty road, unaware of the surprise attack waiting for us ahead as we continued to drive.

My eyes set on the left side of the road, low like the cold temperature of the wind who's warmth couldn't be revived

A light breath of snowflakes swept over the road like floating silk as my eyes were stolen for a moment by a small feathered creature

Closed up like a rabbit in it's hollow, frozen like fish trapped in a sheet of ice, trembling like death was its new teacher

It was only a blink of a moment I saw it, and a gap of years seemed to rotate around this trap of love

"Mom.. I think that was an owl..." I said with my voice almost in a whispering disbelief. My hand giving her arm a wheel turning shove

"What should we do?" She said as if I was the higher authority. I turned my head to look back, in the opposite direction of the car.

"Turn around..." My mind got into a conflict with those words... I'd be late for work... That didn't worry me, even though we weren't that far...

I didn't know how much longer the animal of sky and flight could handle the harshness of Octobers cold shoulder.

I felt her foot slowly increase it's pressure onto the brakes, her small stormy Toyota turning around, being forced to submit to her.

Approaching slowly, the road was surprisingly empty and alone.  My pupils motionless as they starred

For a minute I believed the lies that I was being an idiot. My mind was tricked into thinking it was a small thick branch with many lairs.

But the truth screamed louder than the wind's howl as shards of ice and snow caused it's feathers to **** outward

To shield his small fragile body. My mind went blank, amazed to be able to steal this opportunity, the car slowly moved downward

Into a gravel driveway, that rested next to a stand. I removed my pink hoodie and inserted myself into the dangers of being alone

Begging and praying in my head to my Lord for guidance, I crossed the wide road, my soul knowing who was in control

  I crept behind the railing and as quickly and quietly as possible I approached it.

Numbed to my existence. It's head in a stage of black and deathly hibernation, I could see it's dying spirit

Lightly, I tossed the bright magenta hoodie over it like a net. A little hop was it's only reaction

I swung my legs over the railing and carefully surrounded it with my hoodie and hands, longing to show it passion.

But it's little strong black claws  fearfully grasped onto the cracks in the road. Like a hook trapped within the jaws of a fish.

I could feel nothing... Only the loud threatening heart beats within me, giving my bangs a swish.

With the steady guidance of patience, my shaking fingers removed his terrifying grip, and quickly swaddled him.

I carried him like a newborn infant as I cautiously recrossed the road, feeling my soul has met natures grim.

We both inserted ourselves into the heat blasting automobile, my mother gasped when she saw the little feathered screech owl cradled in my arms

Still trapped by hibernation's drug. I held him close to the heated vents,  hoping that life will be surrendered to the side of the warm.

His feathers were in several shades of tree bark brown, he had two little feathered peaks that looked like horns to a crown

Softer then even the silkiest chinchilla,  his eyes were closed, but within minutes, only the eye lashes of his right eye flickered around

Suddenly, time revolved around the neck of him, for he turned his head right towards me, and his right eye of sun bursting glow revealed its self to me.

My blood stopped pumping, my lungs shut down, my heart trapped in ice, my eyes making contact with his, feeling like a ship lost at sea.

One of Nature's King of the sky finally awakened, but what was his next move? For these little beast were proud and protective over their bodies

Where their wings have soared over, they claim as theirs, They have used their beaks and claws as weapons against my kind. They have been given the label of being naughty.  

Was I it's next victim? Was this choice a blood dripping trap? Was adoring my Lord's creation a mistake?

The Lord brought this little one in my path for a reason, how can I doubt His plan? For this moment, He wanted me to take.

It's round smooth moving head looked to the left, and then to the right, and then back at me, it's little eye blinking, and very tired

It jumped! But jumped closer into me. It's white and light brown feathered chest against mine. It's head cuddled right into my fingers like a tangled wire.

Softly and lightly I petted it's super soft silky small head, seeing his one eye going into a happy squint.

It only cuddled more and more, demanding more of this sweet affection. His eye gave me that hint

Soon, he started to wander around on my legs, exploring all of this high technology unknown to nature

Flew about a few times to test and experience the ways of human beings, his wings stretched out and soared like sliding glaciers

Once we approached our destination of a recuse center, his curiosity grew as he bonked his head against the dashboard window. The poor thing!

He looked at me, feeling shameful, and filled with stupidity as he flew to my lower arm, and then my elbow that was up high. He nested into it like a king.

He remained there and studied me, his eye never looking away. My soul was at peace until it lashed open it's left eye. My sight got drilled

It was only for an image of a second that I saw that bright red, dark purple, and indigo eye. His left eye was blood filled.

He quickly closed it and snuggled closer to my chest. I felt a hollow part of me being revealed and filled with grace

It's funny how the Lord planned everything out, how he allowed me to experience this sweet heart capturing moment of this wild owl's gentle face.

My Hallow, the name suits you well. For it was an honor for our Holy creator to allow me to interact with the forest beast of flight

A hollow part of me was realized and filled. A desire, a new way to make my Creator made known... through your opposite personality of fight

Permanently blind in your right eye, but your spirit is still sweet and calm to only me. Yours wings still spread like the wide flames of a wild fire

Your unique different colored eyes beaming with adorable sweet love. But also determination that is deep and dire.

You're small, but even our God used David to defeat Goliath. You're an animal, but God used a Donkey to lead Balaam away from danger!

You may not be normal again, but the Lord can still use you, for He has used you and many other animals in my life, although I was a stranger

Hallow, the Blood Filled Eye Screech Owl, I won't allow this lesson to be stolen from me, the lesson of freedom, wisdom, and trust.

The Lord will call us to do the craziest, weirdest, most unbelievable things at times. We shouldn't let these test turn to dust

and if the Lord called me to do something like this again...

*I'd do it in a heart beat...
Thank you Sarah Walker for teaching me about birds
Thanks Colin for Teaching me about death hibernation
Thank You Schafers for allowing me to come a day early to work because if that didn't happen, I wouldn't have seen him
Thank you Mom for helping me with Hallow
Thank you L's, for I wouldn't have seen him If I didn't so happen to look at your house XD
Thank You to the Rescue Center that is helping me take care of him.

If it wasn't for any of these people, I don't know what would have happen.
So... Thank You :)
Liam C Calhoun Aug 2015
Dedicated to the one who'd turned the table.*

I spent two hours
Trying to make you savor me,
When I can’t stomach myself.
I can abuse myself though
And refuse myself, recuse myself,
But all I’d ask is that you
Hold my hand, ensued the chaos,
I promise – I won’t let go.

I spent the entire next day,
Apologetic…embarrassed,
And a little more lost –
Faded further, from the night before,
The now-embedded moments,
Slivers broken skin,
In increments,
And never quite whole.

So I spend tomorrow today,
Anxious, afraid, eye on door,
An ear for the phone, and all for you,
Entirely, when you’d forgotten me,
And I’d hoped to forget me too;
So ensues the conundrum,
A wish that it’s all in my head,
And that you really do care.

Truths be told, I’m usually the fog
That lifts and later leaves come morning.
Off-scripted, you’d beaten me to the punch.
You were the one gone far before dawn,
No name, no number, no, “nothing,”
Yet more, “bountiful,”  than ever,
And maybe it because, the “empty’s,”
Actually me, the awkward, “other.”
It's been nearly a decade. I've been married, divorced, married again. Hell, I have a son now. But I still remember your name. This one's for you baby.
Mollie Grant Mar 2016
Girl says no.
Girl says I said no.

Boy says nothing with his mouth but
moves with hands that say let me start my
cross-examination of the witness
and
looks at her with confused eyes that say
may I remind you, ma’am, that you are under
oath. Would you like to change your answer?


Girl says no, I said no.
She is jury,
she is judge,
she is verdict.
She is gavel banging against sound block
on a case closed.

Boy still says nothing but sheds
his clothes like last season’s skin
and when his jeans hit the floor
they say Your Honor, I am asking
you to recuse yourself.

He is still confused because
buying dinner is just a more polite way
of buying a ******* her knees
so he wrongfully believes that
his libido has the right
to stand in as a judge in appeals court
to overturn her ruling.

This is the only trial that she will see
because prosecution does not want
to press charges with a case that they do not believe
will result in a guilty verdict and ****
is still widely accepted as
just a he-said-she-said civil case.



*According to the FBI Uniform Crime Reports out of every 100 rapes, 32 get reported to the police, 7 lead to an arrest, and 3 are referred to prosecutors.
Tadmar Jelly May 2018
quelque jours, dès l’aube, quand Vénus se récuse du ciel
et la lumière d’or de l’est embrasse la terre
je m’asseois et sirote la rosée du matin
et je pense à toi
allison joy Dec 2013
two
sitting in the car as it snows outside, thinking about you two
i mean i'd be lucky to just meet one of you
but how unfortunate i turned out to be
because i learned neither of you had an inkling of love for me

boys i've loved for some time
how come its been so hard to make them mine
how can i fall for two completely different guys
i seriously deserve a nobel prize

one of you will always be my cup of tea
the other will always be my drink with "no ice please"
but the story doesn't stop there
my heart realized this was something it couldn't bear

so forced to choose at my recuse
my heart turned out to be a bomb i had to diffuse
so i stepped out of the car and into the night
after hours of thinking in the pale moonlight

i knew that i had come to a conclusion
that neither boy would ever be my solution
i went home and threw myself into an oblivion of tears
because it sunk in that i'd lost the boys i loved for years

(a.f.)
Tommy Johnson May 2014
Within the cathedral I lament and loathe
I have but one good eye
I am deaf
My spine is as crooked as the people in the city streets I look upon everyday

I find solace here in this fortress of virtue
I hid away
I ring the bells
They speak for my muted soul

Hear me

You ridicule my existence
Poke and **** my appearance
You are the monsters
I spit at you from high above

You've made me your Baron of Buffoonery
The feast is massive
Street performers, vagabonds
And the dancing flame that has engulfed the hearts of men, I see her

My master
The man who has saved me
Raised me
Has ordered me to retrieve this glowing goddess

I must obey

I have her within my faulty sight
I can smell a sweet aroma of her scent
She cannot stand the sight of me
Her beauty screams is a repulsed terror of me

The captain and his guard come
I'm put in shackles
Sentenced for a lashing
And scheduled for a ride on the pillory

For my master
Where is he now? Hiding
Hiding his hideousness
His betrayal against his celibate vow

But what's this?

The dancing enchantress has come to me
Giving me water
At my hour of suffering and humiliation  
She has me now

I return to my stone hideaway
A day out side of these walls has now cemented me into them forevermore

Master?
I see you
Sneaking in the night with a knife
Where are you going?

The captain is on patrol
I can feel in his heart, the desire for the flame
The same desire I sense in yours
And mine

No!
Master!

The captain is dead
I recuse myself from this world farther

Today there is a hanging
The one who has killed the captain shall be put to death

I see the whip marks on their back
But the face is not the face of my master
It is the face of her who possess my soul
No

I cannot let this transpire
I reciprocate her kindness towards me
With a rope swing rescue
And bring her to sanctuary

But now I am under attack
By mislead beggars
They storm the church
With fire and weapons of pointed metal

She is now somewhere within the house of God
Lost
I must find her before they do
No

The king's men
They'll find her and keep her safe

There she is!
In the pew

Master?
Stay away
Ah, the king's men have come to take her from you
Wait, stop why?!

She is back facing the gallows
I hear the evil cackling of my master from the balcony
We look upon her final moments, he continues to laugh
No

He will not live if she cannot
He is evil
He is wicked
He will die

Within that moment I push him
The executioner pulls the lever
They both fall
To their untimely deaths

I now trudge to the place where they laid her body
Passed the lepers
Passed the rehabilitated prostitutes
To her

I lay next to her, hold her;  I am warm
I am safe, she is safe
I shall stay here
Until my flesh deteriorates and my bones disintegrate

Now my death toll rings, its thunderous vibrations carry me to exquisite eternity
Timothy Joyner Mar 2017
Sessions, sessions with Russia too
Cultivation, Revelation
Sessions, Sessions what your going to do
?
Pilation, Manipulation
Smirking, sneaky, can't look you in the eye
Halitosis, your the mostsis
Yeah, right, you're such a nice guy
Body smellin', lies your tellin'

Russia Russia Whatcha Gonna Do
It's all coming out in the Media what they did with you

Russia Russia Whatcha Gonna Do
Guess what, we are so much better then YOU

You, that would end our freedom
You, that would love to see it fall
You, that has set up this deception
You, we going to finally end this all

Sessions, sessions with Russia too
Cultivation, Revelation
Sessions, Sessions what your going to do
?

Recuse? How about excuse TOO
#political
ClawedBeauty101 May 2018
When they see their off spring being lifted out of their place

Hung by their tail, they squeal and cry for their parents recuse, their heart's race.

Devastation stings their round soft ears as they run for their baby's call

But as they see the hand raise their child over their height of limitation, their hopes and dreams fall...

It was too late... SMACK went the poor, frail body and skull of the little one...

The hand quickly slammed it against the table... Now knocked out...no way to escape or run

SNAP The ******* forced its neck bone to submit to their strength

The parents time of grief and mourning had no length

Frozen shock is the only expression that defines their baby mouses face

In a Blank stare of horror as the blood dripped from their once beloved babies lips... leaving a ****** taste

They scurry away in disbelief to gather the rest of their kin
that still remain alive...

Because they'll never know who will be up next... to be forced to give up their life... and die

*Because... Something always has to be sacrificed... in order to keep something else alive...
In order for something to continue living, it seems like something always has to be sacrificed, whether it's money or food or animals or whatever.  You see, if sin never came into this world, any sort or sacrifice wouldn't be necessary. but we live in a sin-filled, blinded world. We fall into sin, so many times, and death is apart of the fall of sin. We were never meant to die, but now sin has come, death is now apart of this life.  Jesus SACERFICED himself on the cross so he may save OUR LIVES from Hell. So when WE DIE, We may be with Him.

I don't
know,
call me weird but when I had to do this procedure when feeding snakes and other animals mice, this is what I think of... Saving things require a sacrifice...
Ottar Mar 2013
I cannot call my muse, "my muse",
I will not share, in fact, I refuse,
The point is I must step away, and recuse.
When it comes to my inspiration.

If there was no distance between me and...
Then I would not feel so guilty and not likely...
For the estranged feelings which are spoken out loud,
By my muse,  the last thing I feel is among the proud.

This does not work,
I am a sold out ****,
Inspiration,
muse,
Motivation,
Use meditation.

But I stray,
I am pulled, I sway,
These urges
To entertain anything other
than my muse, can bring,
empty words,
unfit prose,
rhymes that make the reader
doze.

And I stray,
I stray,
My muse forgive me I pray,
I will not be gone too long,
Away.

Astray. I stray.
Joshua Dougan Mar 2018
I run and I run away from those feelings.
I drug up my lungs, I pray for soul healing.
But I'ma mute, it's truth with shady dealings
I recuse and lose, it is my daily beatings.
It's got a grip on my throat, my heart in a vise
And I trip over my goals with hardened advice.
A charcoal ladened vice and a pardoned crime.
It Leaves me crippled, like im charting high tides.
If you need me to spell it out you won't understand.
You see me in hell, a self inflicted somber glance.
An argument with one helluva colder trance.
A trance that has me blundering over chance.
You can try to help me but you will fall short.
Cause this monster is huge, with a long cord
Wrapping it around my neck, tears drawn.
Drowning, all around while these fears spawn.
Generalized anxiety with obsessive compulsion and silent depression.
Terrin Leigh May 2015
younger than me, but I'm jealous of you
oh, the headache that ensues
incessant "If you only knew..."
destined destiny, no more excuse
scared therefore silent; reality: nothing to lose
just as unsure, strangely comparable
futile alibi for intimidation's recuse
idle, unmoving; regret unbearable
thought alone, even more terrible
questions surround my small comfort zone
pray for relationship repairable
not broken, but opportunity blown
caustic, coping laughter, you see
I like you, and you like me.
Ghosts of past
anguished by thoughts reflected in shadows

Hellfire raised
burning with past sins that
bellows

Hearing spirits
hailing like that of tormenting
cellos

No place to stay mellow
mine own character created my
demons

Can’t excuse myself
can’t recuse myself
I may only accuse myself

Bear with the constraint of cables
let future actions bear me new angels

Let my culimination guide me to a place
where light awaits
and where no demons have
place

The blood of my vessels to bleed
with peace
and for it to run through me until
decease
and for the heaven I will create to never
cease

Even when I eventually may
What things I've written
over the years, I wonder
what will they remember,
What image will be left for
those I leave behind? A few
weeks ago I had an intense
realisation. What would I do
if I were terminal?
I'm still wasting time trying to
come to terms with my question
and to find some strength from it.
I remembered to breathe today
(so often I forget). I had a couple tokes
and got a little ****** but I don't miss it
as much as I thought (though I miss the times
and the humility of tripping). I avoid work like
an expert, lapping up the sun while it shines and
buying synthesizers; I did just finish
8 months of therapy.

Another realisation, or rather
the application of knowledge
I already possessed, a cause is
merely something we construct.
Supposing how and deriving why
are a useful set of fictions to abide by
yet they cease to serve when I assume
it's my fault and I should be able to make
a change or difference.
I persecute and victimise, recuse myself from
my own life, wondering whatever could rescue
the person I was
as a child.
Music might.
☮ <3 ☯ & 尊
Julian Delia Jan 2018
'Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony.' - Mahatma Gandhi

A nest of conniving snakes
A government run
By people who are barely human beings;
'How do you sleep at night?'
Is what I would ask.
'After drinking expensive liquor,
And on sheets made of satin and kashmir,'
Is what I would get.



Now -
After being lied to for so long
We are to believe in our nation
As a capital of culture,
And as a capital
Of all there is to admire;
How dare they,
After setting our souls on fire?
How dare they,
Tell me what to see and feel?

My criticisms, my observations,
my mind -
You may own everything else,
But you cannot own the few cubic centimetres inside my skull.
You might spend millions on it,
And on some days, you might succeed;
The wool can descend in front of anyone's eyes,
But it's not a permanent deed.



Know this -
In a world engineered by you to be fake
A few of us still see what's real
And what IS real
Is the hole where our hearts should be,
The one you oblige us to fill up
With a poisoned cup,
One filled with empty promises
And deceitful predictions.

Public opinion is writhing and shifting,
Something that is breathing, living;
The more you lie and cajole,
The more you steal control
The deeper the grave
That you are digging for everyone,
Including yourselves.



The most discordant, badly-glued together house of cards
I have ever seen;
Harmony is nowhere to be found
Amidst claims of national unity.
It is innately human to think
Of all as equal -
This is a feeling we corrupt as we grow.

What difference does it make
Of whose womb you are born
If you spend the rest of your days
In a blinding, consuming haze
Of power, abuse and of basically,
Being the cruel whip
That cracks society into motion?
What makes you think
That you and your ilk deserve more?
Others have no windows in their houses,
Not even the slightest current of air,
Yet I'm supposed to be grateful
For every written promise you tear?

*

So many ******* lies!
The truth
Hidden behind walls
Governed by well-dressed criminals
Has come out;
None of us have an excuse.
It is wise to recuse
The act of moving up the ladder
Quietly and without dissidence,
Especially when that same ladder leads
To a place where all that is good
Goes to its slaughterhouse,
To be assembled and re-synthesised
As an undead form of the soul.

**


We SAY
We are a great nation,
That we are the best
That we are the centrepiece
In everyone's palace of jealousy.
Then, if it really is so,
Why
do I
Along with so many others
Have to break my back every day?
No respite, no breaks awarded,
And for all that? I will die
Poorer than I was
When I originally started.

I have minced my words long enough -
I pity the undying souls
That inhabit your bodies
For when your physical body fails you,
The torment you have unleashed
On the souls of others
Will haunt nobody else
Except for you.
A poem based on my country's political situation, and in truth a general overview of Western politics.
Jackie Apr 2018
Whether I'm black or blue
Whether I'm true to me
Or true to you
I can't help but feel like I'm being used by you
You take and take and give a little but I'm satisfied
Everybody around me not knowing why
Why do my insecurities run my life
And you could give me no attention but I'd still be walking 2 feet behind
You act like you're not good enough
****
I'm a ******* mess with a big heart
That's not enough
If you told me to come over and smoke you up
I'd be there
You don't realize that I'm ******* scared
My demons are just waiting to reappear
And how the **** am I supposed to control myself
Alone by myself
Trying to find pills to **** myself
How come when I need somebody they're all gone
If you called me right now I'd walk through the storm in my brain just to be next to you
If you're not giving me the best of you
Why do I stick around so long
I always find myself giving too much
And then I **** myself up
You're going on a date
So I pour another drink
That makes sense
Why can't I just tell you that it bugs me when you talk about all the guys who don't really see you
I could write a list of all the things I like about you
And if you died right now I'd probably die too
You just want a guy who won't really love you
But I love you
I stand on my own but still want to be next to you
You ignore me when we're apart but smile when I see you
Don't stand too close to me I'll want to be close to you
******* I want to be close to you
Sometimes I feel so connected then I feel unattached from you

I'm drunk and you're sleeping
You're stressed and I'm reaching

If you would open up I could stop the flood
But I'm gone

You always play this game
But I'm not equipped for it
These guys don't even know
When I open up just know I'm real
Sometimes I know how you feel
Other times I'm not sure if it's real
Or you just need to feel something

If I'm fading don't make me wait for you
Stay with me or let me leave
I'm dying quickly

Please recuse me
Jack P Apr 2018
...before the eternal worm devours connecticut
one will cycle through the stages of grief
as though one is trapped in a revolving door

two will lock eyes with immemorable combination
reprise themselves of their situation;
i meant "recuse", sorry, although - sadly
the former would not take me aback

three will kick the bucket
but only into the pouring rain
the torrential downpour of one's errant brain
to catch the storm in an endless black

but it boils down to the one, who -- utterly defeated -- says to the other:

"you know me less than you know yourself, and that's saying something"
to the endless uncaring and his little backpack of slow-burning practical jokes
Mark Sep 2018
When mind's own memoirs wither down to bone
then whom shall know my love in distant years?
For lest I carve her ode on graven stone
tho' grey is colder than my love appears.

Tho' many birches bear my hearted etch
and golden rays may stipple love and shrine,
arborists dead to old will send my sketch
to paper sheets, inscribed of love not mine.

On webbing sites my posts shall render true
but then unused accounts shall too erase
or kin may not so trust what's old, to new
my love that lost in time, will too in space.

This timeless form of type, I now shall choose!
Yet if undone, let love in death, recuse.
Ajax Oct 2019
Do you remember me…
Sitting in my chair
I looked to my right, Theres no one there
I looked to my left, there was you
With your freckled face and ***** blonde hair
Just laughing and smiling in your dark blue chair
Always saying you were never perfect
No one ever is in retrospect
Always saying you never deserved me
You were the only one ever worthy
Always wishing there was two of me
One with you, another with my family, Just you and me
We went from sitting in the classroom learning about democracy
To sitting on your bedroom floor playing monopoly
Never knowing how to play it properly
You could always unmask the real me
Everyone trying to get me to vent to them, acting like they know me
Never knowing what I have completely gone through
But you were different though
I Went to all your music shows, not just for fun
But to hang out and see you ***
Wish I could turn back time
and throw you that well deserved life line
You and I were both broken around the same time
I always showed you how much I cared
But i also know at times it felt like i had disappeared
I wish it hadn’t, I was just scared
The distance you and i were both ill prepared for
Now that you’re gone, you've moved on
Scared to ask you, always blinded by fear
Venting to each other like we were both needing some sort of repair
Im sorry if i ever questioned you on what you were going through
I tried my hardest to recuse you
Deep down knowing I was the real issue..
Khoisan Dec 2022
Without recuse
morning, evening, afternoon,
no matter the weather
fine-tuned
bad-mouthed
forged facts
obscured
views
strange
mews
headline
news.
Bob B Nov 2018
A day after the midterms, Trump
Showed that he was true to form,
Once again reminding us that
Effrontery is becoming the norm.

In a brazen act of utter defiance,
Trump fired Jeff Sessions,
The attorney general, which adds one more
Deed to the list of Trump's transgressions.

Ignoring the normal line of succession,
Trump installed as acting chief
A loyalist, since loyalty is
The current admin's leitmotif.

Matt Whitiker is the man--
Known as the West Wing's "eyes and ears."
Another case of obstruction of justice?
At least that's how the move appears.

Whitiker has a paper trail
A mile long, criticizing
The Mueller probe, so Trump wants him
In charge of the case. How NOT surprising!

The DOJ is supposed to be
Fair and impartial. Not anymore.
If Whitiker doesn't recuse himself,
We all know what's in store.

It's frightening how the DOJ
Is tied to the president's apron strings.
Innocent people have nothing to fear;
Desperate people do desperate things.

-by Bob B (11-8-18)
Satsih Verma Oct 2023
Building my ruins
again. There was no pain out
of love. Unreality was valid.

My voice is changing to
recuse the black thoughts. No
moon comes near me any more.

I want to become as
I was, to renew the nakedness of
truth. Life has made it *****.
Michael Angelo Nov 2018
Not sure
                   When it happened.
When I lost passion.
Maybe,
                 Like all things,
It fades with time.

The process of moving a pen
Across a page doesn't feel the same.
Words don't carry weight,
But still they pull me down
As I drown in a pool of non-existence.
And I say "non-existence" because if you exist in a state other than your full potential, does it even really count?

All the failures of past generations and their endless frustrations; can you not feel them mount?

All the questions I can't ask out loud
So I write them down,
But what do I do when anxieties abound
And the smell of fresh ink doesn't sedate me like it used to?

When life gets too much
And you need to escape the clutch
Of reality, where does one recuse to?

Gentle words
                          Move me
Amongst
              Fellow Gentiles
Who weren't promised
                A thing.

What's psalms do I sing

               Now?
Phil Feb 2021
Lighthearted. Laughter. Legitimate. Loss.

Nonsense. Non-stop. Never-ending? No, not.

Bottled up. Beaten. Broken. Bemused.

Regret. Refresh. Reset. Recuse.
preservationman Sep 2019
45 has done it again
It’s time after time
Thank god you are genuine
Merciful and kind
Lord I pray for the White House
The President needs your help
He doesn’t understand the world in situations being felt
The President needs to understand his own transgressions
The United States is in a total mess
The world sees and would confess
The GOP seems to be scare of 45
Yet they should be thankful that they are still alive
The Democrats are trying their best with thinking responsively
The Powers that be have no commitment
Responsibility seems to be over 45’s head
He rather function on his accord instead
Now the National Security Advisor has just been fired
Now whom will replace being hired
The Citizens of Bahamas had a Hurricane disaster
Lord, please help them survive
Water and Food is of short supply
Help the GOP and the Democrats in seeing eye to eye
The world is trying patiently in watching and waiting
But being patient is of a short fuse
45 needs an awakening of recuse
I also pray of an agenda in Gun Reform
Guns, Bullets and lives
Many have died while others will never be the same
45 is just plain lame
Please Lord, organize and rearrange
Let your intervention, so the world can remain sane
This I pray Oh Lord, Amen
Lawrence Hall, HSG
Mhall46184@aol.com


                                             After the Elections


                                     What century is it outside?

                           -Boris Pasternak, “About These Poems”


Perhaps next we will have book burnings, torchlight parades
And children singing "The Horst Wessel Song"
To be scared is okay, even logical
But it’s not okay to recuse one’s self on election day
Insurgent Republicans make major gains in Texas primaries | The Texas Tribune
Aditya Roy Jul 2019
An inchoate who is looking to get better
In these familial dark worlds, lintels ringing
Freewill, think I am going to be a freedom rebel
Rebel and recuse yourself, the rights are to stand up
To incoherent talk of honesty, with the writs to dictate ownership
Ignorant talk of slavery, when bravery is mercy
Sober and brightening, still waking up to this kindness there-and-that
I've accustomed myself, to writing myself some double-talk
Questioning every thought, the music is mapped out for the greater good
Cutting through the noise, cherishing my moments with tocsins and sermons
I am religiously present, this is talk of dubiousness in polygamy
Why free will when you are forever in this mirror, of dying loathing
Why free will when you are ne'er in this mirror, of sleeping solipsism
Caitiffs cutting through the silver morning, to be glad to drink good times with opulence and ease

— The End —