I love you with all my might,
All my heart and all my life.
But if you fail to put up with my battles,
I'll cleave our bonds with a knife.
The sister I loved and could grow close to
You've disappeared... I was accused
Don't know who you are... but you were someone I knew...
I have lost enough... but you were one thing I didn't want to lose
Too many wounds... but that exploded out of the blew
"You're over thinking..." But I knew the truth
How do you people feel now!? You've ignited my fuse!
Because now... She's not the person I once knew...
....I miss you Rachel... Please get well soon...
If i was to admit what has been stirred
I know on my life, I would only be cursed
Somethings are better kept unsaid...
What it was you felt when that final day came
Now I can admit that I have experienced the same
But now I get it and now I see it
nothing can be promised... and nothing and guaranteed...
Sorry Nicko it took so long
Its because of who you are
Nor because the choice heart
Its not because of what you have done
Nor the actions you've chosen
Its because of who you are to me
And it makes my memory decease
Its because of the emotions I contain
That creates this heart to go insane
I would be close if health allowed
But for now... I must stand down...
I have a medical condition called syncope.
This is when my heart creates irregular heart beat patterns due to lack of oxygen, low blood sugar, and fast heart beating
When this happens... blood drains from the brain, causing a black out moment, and fainting spell, or a confusion memory moment for a few seconds up to a mintue.
Stress, Anxiety, Dehydration, Tiredness, and physical and emotional exhaustion can cause this...
If there is something (or someone) that cause my heart to do irregular patterns... i have been told to stay away until im properly medicated... or it can get worse
So forgive me for staying away... But my heart races out of fear and happiness and i dont want to have a black out or memory moment sorry...
Im tired of looking and feeling so pathetic...