There once was a black man... Old at heart, he fought verbally and accordingly with bold words, which abbreviated and arbitrated great art! He spoke of activism. Not just racial, and economic racism. He fought against demonic injustices for you, yes, made me see. He stood for principles of non-violence. Acknowledged corrupt government

mileage, European knowledge and college. A philosopher, teacher
and preacher as well as a civil rights leader. When he spoke his words of fire indeed chiseled and inspired. Causing some to conspire and also perspire! Born January 15th 1929 in Atlanta, Georgia. Named in honor of the German protestant Martin Luther. Bachelor of Arts

degree in sociology. Making a mark in doctoral studies, systematic theology. June 5th 1955 This King married Corretta Scott in Heiberger,
Alabama for many to see. Proceeding with four children: Yolanda, Martin Luther the 3rd to be! Dexter Scott and Bernice to increase the peace. Despite the European police, the movements and stressed

protests, the silence, ****** and racial violence. The segregation and interrogations in force, instead of integration of course. Black mishaps, lack of differences in relapse perhaps! Plagiarized and slandered, demised by some of the wise. Accused of communistic ties. Blinded
by others’ eyes and of our world’s twisted lies. Montgomery, Georgia

bus boycott, 1955 was the year. However, forever in disguise, our fear of tears was apparently adhered. From here to near, also all those dear. Mere letters he wrote, from Birmingham jail I quote! From the slums, some of sums, hail and prevail! A creation prevailing into a deriving and thriving nation. Mr. King’s vision of a dream, mission,

opposition, optimism and truism, on our wars, welfare and more. I suppose this sounds honest and fair. Mr. King’s theories and worries in emotionalism, evangelism, humanitarianism, racism and socialism. Nobel Peace Prize won in 1964. Regretfully, you may have heard of this before. Government conspiracies and indecencies. Assassination

and discrimination, allegedly, by James Earl Ray. On April 4th, I
almost choke, because for him, his blood did soak. Some thought this **** was a thrill or forced by will. Others still procrastinate in hate! However, forever Martin Luther King was and still is one of the late greats.

your father is a morbid man puddy. .. . but morbid can be good if you accept it...
..how can it be good?idunnoimnotmakinganysense............   ..  ..    .well.   i guess if youre in the right mood or in the right setting.(i pictured people. a woman mainly. with dark hair. and everyone had glasses of red wine and were laughing in a short hysterical way. and i realize these people arent representations of people ive seen act like this, theyre representations of me. i kno that feeling which makes that laugh. when hearing stories or seeing pictures or videos of people dying suddenly or getting tortured and the abuser maybe dismembering himself or herself after or committing an interesting suicide which we love to hear about and the sickening brutality and pain and fear and cringing you feel is instantly replaced with a swift too swift and sharp laughter. and these stories are real, otherwise its just silliness or boys being boys with their sick imaginations and saying it just for attention or to be funny or weird.. and we all might question ourselves slightly but either Time or Exposure to the Wicked World or most likely the validation of our indecencies with everybody else's  because its a whole room laughing lets us feel better about it each time but then more ashamed of our withering virtue until we forget. and something to understand from the remark "but either Time or Exposure to the Wicked World or most likely the validation of our indecencies" ad its there is no difference in this matter between the options 2 and 3 because we are the Wicked World. and all 3 are just things we waste. and if not laughing sharplyand loud and insane maybe some of us are at least being entertained while wailing in a definite cringe or exasperation or i dont kno but it is blended with the jovial air of the room. and people and family members laugh with and comfort and joke with eachother like a pride or a flock or any group of animals showing their young 'here.its ok.its an apple. you can touch it. it wont hurt you. its our food.' but we say "c'mere, the foundation of this world and all its agony will rip you apart, so here, learn how to find joy in it otherwise youll be too effected and will need to be discarded from normal happy people who kno their happiness comes first. because thats how we work as people and as a group. now here, have a drink. we pretend it helps and seek it out against our better judgment because we dont want to exist because weve become nothing in place of the wide range of terrible emotions we should experience when seeing the world for what it is.. ourselves most of all." and i guess that is what i pictured. the average happy people. family people. nice house and aunts and christmas people. and i kno im biased but nothing in this imagery matters. i was supposed to capture just the thoughts which i actually spoke to myself or my dog or whoever but now i have a brick-sized moving picture of my interpretation of happy family americans and other nations and just everybody.  but im no different. deep down anyway. deep down i am selfish and scared and come to the conclusion that the world is too complicated to be fixed and were too dumb to fix it reguardless and more so we are filled with souls which shift too often which we must only watch drift away moment to moment leaving us with many things but definitely a healthy amount of selfishness and, well, psychology i guess. we can figure our race and ourselves out as much as is possible and maybe even be right about some things, but knowing what drives us and feeling compelled are unrelated. too constant of a shift are we to be anything describable in correct terms and too unknown is the future to kno wut form our shift could bring us to. ..this is all absolute nonsense. i started rambling world. u gave me a mouth and i started rambling with it. i am definitely equal to a baby human or animal just shrieking into the world because, well just because its alive. so im a baby with no way of managing my existence other than making sounds because there are ears everywhere and peeing where i lay because its inside of me then it comes out because im unaware of my functions and we all send scattered unfinished nonsense to eachother and they send their own version of it back to the human and we manage to make ourselves sick and destroy our home and we're like an ant colony with no coordination.) and then something about laughter is sometimes a coverup for discomfort, so laughing from something morbid is not good. but then again it is still a laugh, and wut is the point system for laughing goodness and thats it the end jesus christ stop. *******. later. txt me wenever. have fun at ur party. i hope the weathers nice up north and not too cold cuz i kno u hate the cold. and im probably a boring **** saying cheezy things trying to act natural and nice and caring but i have my own agenda and am too unnaware to kno that and therefore will never be able to change for the better because i am a stupid human who thinks they have something figured out about every moment of every day but cant really do anything. cant see myself how others see me and cant feel the right way ong enough to accept it and constantly contradicting my conceptual and moral and spiritual universe and will never realize that 99.9 percent of the time my thoughts are of things like rocks and puffy things and shooting myself in the head and im hungry and **** that ***** and... im such a loser. if i dont start acting and living like a straight shooter my only outcome down the road will be lonelyness, heartbreak. regret. shame. and many other bad things where everything i love is either ded or has abandoned me because i am now a man and there is no such thing as abandoning a man but i am alone and want to die and i do. i **** myself and im ded. and there is no heaven and i have no soul and no one knows im ded and the passerbys and police officers and coroners who kno that im ded dont kno my name. so everyone i ever loved who havent loved me for years will die years down the road with families who love them and i will never cross their minds again. and i will deserve it. and i will pray for satan to devour my flesh and feel a demon inhabit my body along with my terror.

you don't like my words
but you preach yours.

your words are full of frightful hate,
and childish ignorance.

your veins are black just like your distraught style.
and your heart is cold,
just like your fate.

you may think I'm harsh,
you may think I'm incorrect,

but my opinion will still say the same,
just like your indecencies

I am not your accessory
a statement piece
to your spineless connections
The thousandth image-oriented festivity
That you thoughtlessly threw
Due to the boredom of your own reflection
I am not a string of pearly witty conversation that you casually bring up when you aren't capable of employing stimulation
I am not a magenta lipstick you reach to cover up your mindnumbing gossip about the neighbors indecencies
You try to duplicate me and slip your right, then your left foot into vintage leather Jimmy Choos
Oh but your archless perception of life
Doesn't quite fit your soul next to mine
Empathy was never your strong suit
Oh but a tailored cold charcoaled judgement suit--that fits just.right.
Still you try to wear me, despite discrepancies
And oh how you hate the way I mock your silhouette
I clash with your champagne clings
You try to bash me against silverware but I remain mute
"Oh but if I can't make her an accessory, I shall make her an appendage!"
Oh how Christian and courteous of you
In the same way you asked your bridesmaid to step off the alter when she came out to you on that heavenly day
You ask me to be your brothers appendage
Oppressive and aloof
Asking was always a waste of time for you
You expect.

cool iridescent droplets
tumble soundlessly over damp stone steps
spat from a dark cloud-smitten sky.
the corners of your lips twisted
in an ominous snarl,
eyes flashing
green lightning.
make-up streaming down porcelain warm-apple cheeks,
mixing with ***** rain.

you, typically picturesque magazine perfection
trussed up in delicate pin-up duds
your hair twirled into a million
intricate, flawless little curls
that fall together like pieces
in a puzzle.
secretly pinned together to uphold a pretty facade.
far from easy and natural,
yet more desirable.

but look at you now.
hair soaked, tendrils of slick dark silk plastered to cold skin,
with mascara running down
an immaculate visage,
that finely curved chest
heaving with furious little sobs.
fists clenched with white hot knuckles,
you shake with rage.
just like a little girl...
a little girl hiding behind a layer of mother's make-up,
throwing a tantrum.

Maybe it's endearing;
to see such passion
from one who never showed her soul
and kept her musings locked tight in a faraway place.
Maybe it's not.
The creature I once loved,
destroying little parts of my soul,
one by one
with sharp words and cruel insults
guilt-trips and indecencies.

But the tear-stained face in front of me
no longer evokes the desired emotion.
Hollow steps take me away,
in the opposite direction,
her dismal cries following me -- wailing ghosts
lost, wandering through the wintry rain.

I know you've got a heart of gold and emotions that run along your sleeves
but lately,
you're better with a bottle and some scrapped knees.

You're introverted
A minuet ******

But it's not the the skin you bare
Or the the way you touch
It's the way you've given up

You grew into the buildings
And buried yourself inside
between a mattress and ***** sheets

They won't save you
No, my beautiful raggedy Anne
No, they'll turn that heart of gold to stone
They'll paint your face with prophecies-
Little indecencies
You'll be ripped from some ***** banks magazine
A pin up doll
Such a perfectly decayed dream
I want to cut the string that holds you up

Hit the ground running-
Remove your mind from others hands and
Fight

Let bad blood filter into the streets and watch the acquainted burn into the night

in a city that breeds hooligans
ingrates and indecencies,
where the architecture of a lost era
crumbles into brothels and madhouses,
where shootings peak
with the heat of summer,
where new windows are boarded up daily
and we chop down trees like fanatics,
in the city I call home,
in the city I love,
destroyed by its ignorance,
I am condemned to silent pleas
and empty stares.

You don’t understand,
At first it was a compromise I had to accept,
The sulfur-ridden stench that blazed my nostrils
And made me seek a foreign tongue.
They do not think I worked
But I did.
I washed the pains that clenched at
My existence.
I refused to ignore that foul pulpous print.
Lured did it!
Lured me to utmost perfection.
Then John became but a stone
In lurking shadows completely unseen.
I revealed me to myself
And hands were not shaken, that was not custom.
Into the circle of my life
One revelation proved its superiority,
And now its comfort has deserted me.
Take me back
Take me back
Wrap me in your shredded parcels of paper-tainted glory
Tinge me with indecencies. I fear no guilt.
I want to see my better half sing
And dance between lines and smudges that thwart
Into perception,
To suspend the hour.
Being.
Doing.
Without Needing
To be
There is no sanctuary here
I lie in a familiar position now
The attic floor cools my flushed face
Pinching nerves cultivate essence
My hands clench a tight fist
My knuckles…
They bleed yellow.

These lovely walls so brigth and peacefull like winter snow oh what magnificent features. So soft as a pillow in my white suit I giggle. Morning and night I spend my time thinking within these walls of the time of when I was outside. Such beauty , such glory on everyones eyes. A tip toe here and a tip toe there giving them a smile from ear to ear and it doesn't end there. I share them my love they give me there blood what is that you say that this is not love? on the contrary my friend just look and see , in this generation what is there to be? If people **** each other for ignorant sympathys , Lustful envyies and ungratefull indecencies . why cant i be me? its not a sickness its another way to see how tragedy can be embraced by insanity and how wonderfull a diferent point of view can make a man be judge by lack of humanity. Im not crazy.....i just see the world in diferent points of view....what about you?

From atop mountains
Of debt
We tumble, like
The thrill of defeat
Dripping down
The quivering chin
Of blood-stained
America.

To quote a thunderstorm:

"All who question
The efficacy
Of God
Shall crumble
To an infinity
Of indecencies."

To quote a God:

"All who fall
Have not
Been pushed,
Those who rose
Were not all
Pulled.

"**** the heathens.
Justified are those
Who avenge the treasons
Committed unto me."

Waves of
Iridescence
Cleanse our pallettes,
And we open wide
For the next forkful
Of fermented
Excrement.
Bloodied are our knees
As we receive
The sacrement,
Trapped like rats
Cast in cement.

To quote a slave:

"Bound by prior
Engagements,
Sacrificed to
Advertisement,
The seeds of men
Wither in the soil.
Blood weeps
From poisoned skies
While YES WE CAN
Opens eyes,
And seals fate
Within fine
Print."

Wolves in
Cheap disguises
Bate their breath
Behind red grins
And finalize
The list of
Who gets in,
While in the cold
Stand the masses,
Marinating
In their own
Molasses.

From atop Parnassus,
A silver-lined horse
Watches the madness,
And snarls and spits
In shamed defiance,
While Apollo
Holds court
To form the alliance
That will interrupt
The defiling of man.

To quote a soldier:

"Cold is the mud
That cradles
The valiant.
Swift is decay
In these
Transient days,
Where passive
Observers rot
In mass graves."

Designed by the rich,
Assembled by slaves,
Our system
Keeps churning,
Rejecting all
Who misbehave.
Reflected in
Concentric waves,
The faces of children
Contemplate age,
And what it means
To be forever
Enraged,
Engaged in endeavors
That are only dreams.
They can't be saved,
And neither can we.
So it seems,
And so it should be.

If gestures be great wonders, I'd build you the pyramids.
They'd be as vast and grand as when we gaze into the universe,
telling tall tales of stars.

And It'd be just you and me.

We'd connect the dots in our hearts
Well past twilight, in the charm of the dark.
and pick our thoughts apart.

We'd dance like pups and sing our songs
like the foolish children that we are.
We'd ride the same frequency
revel in our indecencies

We'd breath winds of nostalgia.
reliving vibrant memories.

We'd laugh and joke
Listen to rock and roll,
smoke northern lights and boundless joys
while music vibes with our souls.

We'd fall asleep
trading treats and body heat.

We'd dream of fairy-tale love
until the next time we meet.

And It'd be just you and me.

When we enter this reality
Through the uncalled memory
Of our birth,
Crying with nonsense
To newly unveil senses.

The doctor readying his slap
To insure
You’re aware of the world.

The initial daybreak
Grasps with instinct
From the stem
Of our brain,
But we develop
Further in life learning
To walk, talk,
And even further
To tuck in that dress shirt,
All in all learning
The basic facets of living;

Only to further learn
That we cannot know everything
Undefined definite definition
A plotting knot of resolved fiction,

Dualities, influences, susceptibilities,
Insecurities, indecencies, and tendencies
In us all for us to see
And choose not to be.

The card game
Of social exposition
And inquisition
Learning to understand our face
And the people that we trace,

Forming, deforming, uniform
Difficulties
We stumble,
To return standing;

Challenges in holding hands
Returning affections, and mental afflictions
Gaining understanding
That we are being human beings
Refractive in and Reflective at seeing

Birth parallels death
No choice, versed vice
Falling and stumbling sadly
Last moments
Of our lives, begin

Talking gibberish,
Eating mush,
Having no memory
What happened yesterday?
While you lay in your crib
Asleep to a reality

The padlock on the continuous barnstorm of a transcendent time whose bunkum is transmuted consciousness aligning with parallax to a congruent worldview is not axiomatic but certainly a veridical property of reality. The universe is as much concept as percept and both properties of consciousness that lead to adaptive behavior are tethered to the eccentricity of the observer rather than the oblong nature of the observed where errors in prima facie judgments delineate the saplings of humanity to beaze under the proctored sunlight of an eternal sunshine that withers seldom to the whims of capricious arbitrage of those whose hubris exceeds the limits of the intellectual frontier because they are gilded with bricolage mentalities that scaffold the skeletonized worldview rather than apprehending the concretism and synthetic arraignment of interrogable reality in a manner that acknowledges the factitious intersection of pioneering understanding and the corporeal existence of realities both transcendent in spatiotemporal mapping and reversible propinquity to the sensible acquisition of tangible knowledge. I contest the worldview of many philosophers as a callow retread of basic logic whose ambition is underserved by a desire for prolix pellucidity rather than cogent succinct promethean formulations that dare to muster the herculean task of demystification even if the entropy of formulation is always flawed by the jaundice of the observers rather than the disdain of the observable consensus. We swing by a filipendulous thread that dangles speculation and reifies the blinkered piebald world of spotty concatenations among neurons recognizing that incomplete associations become the staples of philosophies that are precarious in some logical foundation but sturdy enough to weather the vagaries of the bluster of mendicants who verge on comprehension but pale in comparison to the monolithic edifice of so-called truth when the defalcation of figureheads supplants the clerisy as the new proctor of knowledgeable assertion. I contend that foofaraw is a primeval instinct of community ecology that expedites the balkanization of otherwise unitive properties of society and ravages them with bickering based on clashing predilections that are bellicose and combative rather than irenic and balmy. The acerbic fates of many leads to a rudimentary pessimism or a chary optimism that chides against the fortified exegesis of divinity that can be both proclaimed and stultified for its latticework properties of buttressing society in a permutation that is nimble in some respects but too turgid and rigid in others. The goal of humanity is to become a pliable instrument of a pliable universe that does not rely on buzzword dogmatism or the masquerade of hollow punditry but that relies on self-reliant principles for ascertaining veracity and impugning mendaciloquence with vigilant alacrity rather than casual sportsmanship that reaches finality only upon the handshakes of a battle waged that concedes the impotence of gladiatorial spectatorship as just a gambit of the half-witted cockney witticisms and shibboleths of sportive diversion rather than consequential and decisive reckonings with the subaudition that undergirds all events of any consequence with either a clinched victory or a callow defeatism of a futilitarian worldview that stoops to reconciliation only to propitiate antagonism and buffer against the truculent brunt of weaponized coercion to checkered flags that arbitrate the outcome of a binary polarity of humanized affairs. The majesty of creation is that reversible boundaries can be permeated in a bi-directional manner through the artifice of concerted thought rather than the orchestration of a linear traipse through the deserts of an inclement fate won immediately when projected upon the tangent of any given velocity at any point of acceleration away from the targeted impetus that grants only a partial vantage, a cantle of reality that is fragmented and piecemeal rather than circular and emergent. The most dire battle that humanity faces is the attrition of circumstance by the purposive declarations of imperious authority that seeks to muzzle the ingenuity of many for the deliciation of the few creating an accidia among the clerical institute of thinkers that imposes hogra that few people can grapple with that they are marooned into a cloister that reaps fewer rewards for an ascendant intellect than a virulent libido can clutch with predatory gallops against the also-rans that fight for carnality rather than the ethereal principles lingering within the grasp of many if it became a cynosure of worthy heralded acclaim. We witness the mass fecklessness of giftedness as a shackle of those whose plaudits come intrinsically fortified but sustain none of the abuses that the pedestrians would like to obtrude upon enlightenment to curtail and abridge the art of invention like the coagulation of blood to rob the vitality of throbbing pulse of importunate self-discovery of its macroscopic vista and its telescopic foresight about the future hodgepodge of a recursive fractalized reality besieged by the enemy of linear logical formulations implemented by ivory tower psychologists to muzzle the empowerment of abstruse language in order to make savory the nostrum of the apothecaries of delegated truth bereaved of recourse beyond certain leaps they cannot fathom well enough to flicker with even a faint transient wisdom that is designed to be amenable only to the supernal nature of ideation rather than the caprice of bedazzled humanitarianism. We need to forswear the -isms that flicker with doctrinaire dogmatism and flirt with forceful harangues that exhort a codified message and launch veridical properties of recondite etherealism into an immovable orbit whose inertia can broadcast a singular message of recoil against puritanism in science or skepticism in faith. The bedrock of this message is the deployment of useful extravagance without inordinate delay, the drivel of malcontent transmogrified into the prattle of estimable giants that have stature among the leviathan enough to recriminate against the autarky of self-smug simpletons that infest the world with barbarous indecencies and crude prepossessions that abortively crumple when met with the acerbic teleological gravity of ulterior consequence rather than blossom under the siroccos of manufactured wind designed for windfalls that always create a crestfallen aftermath from the anticlimax of understanding leading to the desiccation of consequence and the engorgement of precedence. These frangible realities become buoyant because the physics of the public dialectic insulates the creaky rickety vestiges of canonical knowledge as a sworn precedent inviolable and immune as a building block of all scholasticism, a retread of parchment recycled over and over again to entrench the past as the titanic vehicle that dictates the future of thought even though the porous inconsistencies of the vagrants of crude formulation make such a vessel less seaworthy than scientism and dogmatism of the monolith would have you believe to be true. The querulous quips of the uninformed predominate with such clutter that the armamentarium against useful idiocy is stagnated into a resigned accord with infernal subjugation of the public volition to insubordinate against a system of parochial enslavement rather than a catholic enlightenment whose universalism of principle ensures a steadfast society guided by scruples rather than undermined by the prickly thorns of abrasive contrition and the magnetism of empathic concern that sabotages the clarity of intelligence and provides a welter in the place of a well-arrayed code of peculiar but defiant distinctiveness that acts as the splinter that cracked the intangible but refractory borders of human inclination and demonstrated the sheer force of golden consistency rather than fickle withering resolve. I exhort and implore the world to heed the best minds that realize the syncretism is answerable to contradiction rather than scuttled from beneath by the impudence of its assertions against the common propriety when it stakes controversy as a gamble to aver the veracity of worldviews that violate orthpraxy with gusto as a brazen gallantry to rescue a foundering planet that seeks disequilibrium in harmony rather than an equilibrated sensibility that is proud to discriminate properly and honestly to clinch fact rather than kowtow to factitious slumber of somniferous kumbaya that is too deferent to maxims that are unduly polite only because charisma supersedes genius in its efficacy to mobilize people to fulfill their roles. With the miscegenation of justice that occurs because of expedience we find holes in many legalistic precedents because they anoint pettifoggery over sensible jurisdiction and face a leaky and ramshackle fate to foment paternalism and divide the clerisy among certain key considerations in order to save face rather than to impose a clarity of orderly supervision that seeks to dissipate the embroiled spiderwebs of dodgy prevarication and quacksalver logic to once and for all ascertain the truth that lurks beyond the primal jaundice of Kafkaesque confusion.

isn't it over yet
this insane malaise
of half-remembered phrases
and faded colors

is it too late
to marvel at the resurgence
of native indecencies

the open maw
of a fetid tomb tongue
does it
transgress

and inside the deep heart
of a mistaken call
lies the nothing
that isn't capricious
and i wonder

will it ever end

There's a tolling depth to me,
A rebounding chasm
Space a hopeful quantity
Tuned instruments ignore

Where broken column qualities
Lie naked in the unkempt stubble
Undisturbed, those civilised peaks
Mountains for heavens bored smooth by soft hands

Champing teeth abound the wind,
Old sounds of dun legs taking flight
And leaving the knotted trees
That died in the clotted soil

Be warned, beasts have left this barren
Sharp corners have been smoothed for
Once this land was deep and green
And gushed with florid indecencies

Now its depth tolls
With the charter of the wind
Scattering what few collected rocks remain
As bricks for walls built far beyond.

finding streets with names standing bare back against the wind,
trees a spirit of the times step look
;;can fingers//twisted//ebbed//
gross indecencies ab.ate masterful pieces, works,, looks unlike piercing glances
trancing, truncating Euripides a species of deer unlike peace
so, canned fingers
happ
ens
a shame when you consider.
Does this make Sense to you?

"reperio vicus per nomen superstes patesco tergum obviam ventus ,
to meet with village very name survivor of another's death to be laid open back on the way wind,"
no?
good.

The blade is drawn across her porcelain skin.
She screams as her weak attempts to heal herself fail again.
One for every imperfection.
They line up like tally marks
Counting off the cruel delusions
That haunt her in the dark.
Their stones broke through her
Like plates crashing on the floor.
Now the red cracks are spreading
As she fails to reach the door.
And in the quiet of the night she shatters.

The end of the gun is pressed against his head.
He weeps As he remembers all of those who fed
Those indecencies that have devoured him.
There is nothing left
He is an empty husk
He took out everything that they didn't like
And placed it at their feet asking is this enough
And It never was
So he kept carving to become something they were pleased with
Something they could actually look at
Until he realized they had taken all of it
So He had to take the chance
That this gun was the way to gain their acceptance
This was what they always wanted
And he would give it to them
The last remaining part of him
And with a loud bang he shatters.

This is our generation
Filling our emptiness
With the realization
Of our weakness
We are makeshift puzzles of perverted desires and empty holes.
Never quite being whole.
Placing idols and obsessions as our foundations.
Eventually it all falls apart,
But out of the dark
Rose a cross.
Bringing hope for healing
And completing
The holes that had been there since the beginning.
Light floods through the cracks
That acted as maps
To our wandering souls.
Once tracing the way
To destruction
Now leading to a rebirthing
Into the life of one made whole.
There is hope in the road less taken.
For in it one finds home.

To save my humanity
I'd construct walls
But tears don't lie to me

I'll let them tumble
Their rubble nurturing the surrounding flowers

Would I wish to stand
In a garden of pure flowers
Not burdened by my sins

To hide the indecencies
I'd shower myself in red
I wouldn't see the shriveled roses being left to dead

Yes but still, I'll save the blood I wish to spill
To color the flowers which lead me to a path unseen

A path soaked in red
Ending with light shining from azure skys

I would rather watch the sunset than the sunrise
You are so contrite in your words
So remorseful for the punishment inflicted
For I am not at fault for the pasts indecencies  or the nasty bearing of actions on your heart

But you-
You are to fault for the weight left cracking my bones-
The same damnations that haunt your decisions
Are left haunting in a shell of me

High hope-
Drowned by those I've never even known

(C) Tiffanie Noel Doro

did you mean it when you told me that you loved me? did you mean it when you told me that i'm better than all the rest, all the rest that you pay more attention to? did you mean it when you told me that i was perfect, or pretty **** close? i don't understand what i did wrong, what could have taken you away from me. was it my insecurities? my jealousy? was it the way that i misunderstood your unclear feelings? was it how i loved you, and wanted to be loved in return? that's all i wanted. is she better? does she help you sleep at night too? does she bring those smiles to your face?
i remember when we were talking and you were going through your messages with her,
and you couldn't take that smile off of your face.
should i have caught on earlier that your feelings had changed?
oh, how i wish i did.
i wish i never met you,
never fell for you.
you and your manipulative ways, you and your hateful words and taunts.
you lead me on,
and oh what a great job you did.
i hope they break you like how you broke me.
i hope they make you feel like your stomach is rotting and your skin is peeling,
i hope they make you starve.
because all of this i've done for you,
i've gone through for you.
i've changed so much for you, and worked on all of my indecencies.
i've thrown up meals so that i could have a body that would be easier for you to hold,
but you didn't notice.
you don't care.
you never did.

i'm sorry,
i wish you could have noticed all of these things.
i wish you could have loved me, and not lied to me.*

i wish you would come back to me.

you cut open my core and threw my insides at the walls
with all of your indecencies and heedless galaxies
that i'd try to explore, but you kept closed, and gravity;
my feet on the ground as they should be,
as musicians and stupid poets like me
dedicate promises we're positive don't change how you love.

and i figure you to be my supernova.

this abominable disaster you've caused transformed me into
the ink blots splattered and messy and unconstitutional cracks
in the ceiling that we think to fix but never quite have enough spackle.
and i'm **** at sewing, but you force me to stitch myself back
together for days and weeks until i said,
"i want you out of my life"
even though we both knew i was lying and desperate to feel
something because ****** romantics like me
want hermia and lysander,
not demetrius and helena.

and we can't think without the noise of each other and the
constant loose ends that fray,
and time and time again imissyouimissyouimissyou.

and my silence, your silence is the loudest heartbreak i know,
and beethoven never had these problems because he could feel
and he knew that fire and hearts do not mix,
and neither should deceit,
but pretty boy you tore out my heart with burning hands and kept
it in your back pocket with all the others,
and i never said otherwise because at least i was something to you
even if our hearts beat to different drums,
and explosions,
and cracked ribs that you'd like to take because my heart wasn't enough and you needed pieces of me to make yourself feel whole.

and i wish i was a little more selfish because i'm stuck with a
carcass of my old self and the buzzards don't care of the
shell i am now; made up of frozen sno cones, and your eyes.

All indecencies, all sins
are forgiven.
Not by I, nor by God,
but by the moon itself.
The moon,
the only true witness
to the crimes of mankind.

The blood spilled,
the lies told,
the affairs had;
the moon saw them all,
yet he shone no less brightly
than before.
He, who knows
my crimes;
he, who tells all time.
He, who judges not.

The man in the moon.

Humming to my favorite song
As i walk down the street
A random encounter with a strange looking man
Our eyes meet and i'm falling
You can call it love at first sight.

You were wearing a long coat
It was summer and the sun was bright
But when you undid those buttons
Your motives became clear
Exhibitionist was revealed beneath.

You thought i'd be annoyed
But i fully enjoyed
Being shown your indecencies
And wanting a part of it
So i exposed myself as well.

Your shocking expression
As you witnessed my actions
Turned around and made a run for it
I guess this love wasn't meant to be
Pulled up my pants sulkingly.

No one accepts me
Is there something wrong with my body
Or were you just surprised
That there's someone who's alive
With a hole in their heart.

Like a bird on a tree,
You know me.
Like a life ahead of me,
A life I do not know.
Knowing is a gift,
A gift of knowledge.
Like a bee to a flower,
You know me,
Like sweet lullabies that rocks us to sleep,
Counting the sheep’s, protecting our keep.
Climbing treacherous peaks, and overcoming defeats.
Every adversity we face is a gift,
A gift of knowledge.
Like a lost soul in the wilderness.
You don’t everything about me.
For lie’s course out of fear that you won’t always love me!
It’s like I got a split personality.
So sorry for all the complexity baby.
And Please just be patient with me ok?
For my head at times reaps with insecurity!
That at times be dipping into others privacy.
Which then leads to publicly stating apologies for ones acts of indecencies.
And I can’t bear to wreck another family!
For knowledge may be a gift but sometimes I wish it would skip over me!
Oooohhh! Ohhh!
The tree of knowledge,
A taste so bitter sweet!
The tree of knowledge,
Got me feeling so obsolete.
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Ohh why!
Did ya have to be so so beautifully deceiving!
Maybe people are right when they say it’s better!
So much better!
To not be aware!
To not give a care!
Ohhh! Baby, Knowing is half the battle!
Yeah!
Knowledge is a devious fellow!
And we all get caught up in it’s enticing wind like some rose pedals.
Pedals that fiddle and flicker dropping quicker and quicker.
Till it ripples into the ocean lingering till silence befalls all.
Where love draws like a bow and quiver that has struck my heart and I fall.
Fall into this dream called love.
Where knowledge becomes nothing but a faded memory.
Guess that’s why common sense becomes a mystery.
For love got us thinking unconsciously.

Frantic fingers lace legs with not a single stutter or stir.
Draped in satin dressings,
        serosanginous secretions wrap legs of a cauterized nature.
Hugging near to the skin,
       lapping its sliced wound pains onto saturated gauze,
The fading sky dims dark with a limp,
and a sweat breaks the tight held assembly of entrails covered in bruised blood.

Varicose stains rhythm through my clothes and leave a stark reality of remembrance.
  Regretful instances left a mark upon the very cloth that draped over a dead, red body.
A permanent irritable nerve line leaves tree branch embellishments over ashen skin.
Electric green stems from the transparent indecencies.

Fear not, the intimate belongings huddle close to the head.