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Rainswood Jul 27
I have a tattoo
On my arm
That reads “Love unity honesty”
In my own handwriting
Blocky and straight.
But
I was lying again
when I wrote it
Because
I curl the tails of my “y’s”
True story 😆
Rainswood Jul 26
If I show myself more love
I won’t need it from you
Now I remember
The steps to take
To make it across the floor
Practicing beautiful extensions,
Positive Intentions.
Breathing again
I feel alive
Instead of alone
How simple it is
This balance.
Muscle memory
I know how to keep myself upright
It just takes practice.
Getting back to ballet drastically improves my mental state.
Rainswood Jul 19
My shadow person
Is back.
She wants control of me
Again.

She is rebellious and devious
With a ravenous appetite
for attention
In any form.

Negativity is better than numbness
She says.
With Violence brewing in her heart
She excites me.

I should **** her
somehow.
I think.
But I Don’t know how.

I’m afraid.
For everyone
Except for myself.
We have been together for so long.  
I believe her when she says
She loves me.

She’s dangerous.
Capable of terrible things
She loves to lead me astray
Just to watch me go stumbling down that path.
Again.

She throws her head back laughing
Manically.
As I’m writhing in pain,
Hands clutching my heart.

I should **** her
Somehow.
I think.
But I don’t know how to separate our souls, intertwined.

Instead,
I hold her close to me every night.
Better than being alone,
She says
And I agree.

Stepping into the harsh daylight
With an energy hangover-
Drained.
I know that we’re both wrong.
Rainswood Jun 27
I did it again,
The seeking thing.
Attention please!
The pattern repeats.
Oh my goodness, look at me.
Watch my every movement from behind your sunglasses.
Our passionate tension
on display for the world to see.
The pattern repeats.
I seek fulfillment
and you want to
Give it to me,
Yes, you do.
The pattern repeats.
When the sun sets
And the sweat on our skin has dried
We will meet in the forest.
We know how this goes,
The pattern repeats.
I appreciate
your willingness to help me
Find whatever it is
That I need.
Oh, yes.
The pattern, it repeats.
Awareness,
This thing that I do,
To myself and him and you
Is only a symptom
of the problem
So, The pattern repeats.
Afraid to confront the truth.
How devastating!
The pattern repeats.
Gazing up at you,
I feel seen.  
Sink my spinning head into your heavy chest.
The pattern repeats.
The pattern repeats.
The pattern repeats.
You understand
Exactly what it is
that I need.
It feels so beautiful to be
Held and free.
I will search for you again,
And I know
That you will show.
Until it is broken,
The pattern repeats.
Rainswood Jun 19
Have you been left hanging?
Waiting for approval.
Feeling inadequate, confused.
Follow me on Poetizer, my friends.
I would love to read you!
I love this community I do! I’ve just had several people submit work and never receive approval. Poetizer is a great platform to share your work!
Rainswood Jun 7
You can’t tell from the outside
the range one has until empty
High performance running on fumes
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