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Cné Jan 2018
Climbing on the bus
Not looking forward to this trip
But it meant so much to her  
And how could I predict

That it would be her last hurrah
Before she passed away
Just one year ago marks
The anniversary of that day

It was an annual trip, with her twin
They took to different cities
With a group of old church folks
They called themselves
“The Traveling Gypsies”

As it turned out to be
My last fond memory
Of my mother and her twin
Before they were stripped
Of all their memories

Alzheimer’s was their reward
They gave it quite a fight
Bed ridden in their final days
Until they saw the light

Who's to say how it will end
Or where that place will be
A gutter in the streets of life
Or home where it should be

So as I sit and contemplate
These moments I recount
I think about the road ahead
And how I’ll make it count
My mom and her twin sister both had Alzheimer's. My mom was significantly more progressed than my aunt's. My aunt acted as my mom's caretaker long after we had them both moved to a memory care facility. They both did well there for about 6 months. Then my mom became aggressively depressed and crying all the time. At that time, they both had a bad sinus infection at the same time. My mother recovered but was still crying and complaining she couldn't breathe. However doctors could not find any ailments in her. My aunt ended up getting pneumonia. While in the hospital they discovered and diagnosed her with stage 4 terminal lung cancer. She died 4 months later with the last month being bed ridden, hardly eating until she was nearly only bones and on a breathing machine. My mom and her twin were always connected in the weird twin way ... knowing things between them, beyond normal comprehension. We all believe my mom knew (not in a cognitive way but in her own twin way) before diagnosed that her twin was going to die. None of us expected her to live much longer than her twin. They both had long life forces even crippled with cancer and Alzheimer's. My aunt Lorea (other mother) died Oct. 27, 2016. Up until that point my mother could still walk, talk, eat and recognize me and my siblings. However after she lost her twin she could no longer walk requiring much more individual care. We moved her to a residential home care facility. They worked really hard to try and revive her willingness to live. It wasn't a conscious choice to give up because with Alzheimer's your brain doesn't work right. She lasted less than 3 months after the death of her twin. It was heartbreaking, to say the least, to witness. I rejoice her being reunited with her twin and my father and free of the confinement of Alzheimer's but I'm still working through the finality of it on the earthly side. Growing up as a child of twins is a blessing of having two moms (one being the cool mom ... the mom you could tell anything to .. knowing she would know how to explain it to your real mom in a way you couldn't bring yourself to do) and a sister cousin, my aunt's daughter. I had an older sister (10 years) too. So in my case I had three moms I love dearly. I am grateful to still have my sister.
han Dec 2017
I love the way the world
passes by me like a movie scene
I’m in the car
gazing out the window
content being an observer
I realize I am so small
compared to this world
My one little story
is apart of the bigger
everything
That plays itself out before me
December 6th~han
han Dec 2017
Traveling is like a drug
I’m high when I reach my hand out
the window and feel the wind
When I stand on a mountain
or with my feet in the sand
For a moment this is reality
and I never wanna go home
The world is home
December 6th~ han
Juniper Phillips Oct 2017
The mood is right;
headache,
loud noise,
babies crying,
tight spaces.

You notice all the curves and lines you would have never saw, some people close their eyes while others stare out a small glass circle to admire white cotton candy and mix of green and blue.
No matter your place at the moment, you dream of the adventure to come when you reach the place where the ants roam.

The mood is right;
head dreaming,
loud thoughts,
babies learning,
new spaces.
none hopped*
aboard Jerry's train
to-day
but Jerry's train
was boarded
any other day

how fickle
the traveling public
*can be
Nicole Bataclan Sep 2017
We take a break from work
From life; and fights
People we avoid
People we adore
One and the same
When the head has already left.

Amongst strangers
Widened horizons
On a rooftop somewhere
Playing djembe in the middle of nowhere
Far from everything
Suddenly it hits

Less or more,
Who am I
Without my focal points?

I will be richer
In memories
Come back tanned,
Stuffed and happy
The routine continued just fine
Without me.

Those I avoid
Those I adore
Sitting at work,
My life; and fights
One and the same
Once the heart is back in the apartment.

When we look forward to
Do we leave it all
Wherever we go?

Looking back
Did I not take it all
Wherever I strolled?
Hannah Sep 2017
Entry ~
I know you're scared. You should be scared. You're taking a huge leap of faith leaving the only "home" you've ever known. But that home you built isn't four walls, and a solid tin roof. It's your soul. It's that thumping in your chest that keeps you awake at 2am. It's the memories you've stored, locked away tight behind steel bars, because god only knows if those bars weren't there those memories would hit you like the eye of a storm. Calm at first, sweet, but then painful, like shards of glass beneath your feet. And I know how much it hurts to leave. To walk away from so many unresolved things. To remove yourself from the lives of people you rely on, that rely on you. But part of living is knowing when to leave. It's knowing when your environment no longer suits the shell you're in. It's easy to tell when that chapter of your life begins. It starts with a slow depression easing its way in, and an unexplained restlessness. I know how much you fight it. The warning signs telling you it's time to go again. You are so afraid of being free, but your curiosity has its own needs. It was never a choice being free. It's always been a part of your destiny. I know you've felt that unexplainable presence easing your anxiety. And it's okay to breathe. It's okay to just be. To not know where you're going to be next spring. It's all a part of the plan. You need to have faith that those guiding you won't lead you astray. You are being protected, and I know you aren't religious, but when you feel like you've lost your way, fall to your knees, and pray. Look for the butterfly, and have faith that one small act of courageousness will set your life in motion. But you have to be willing to take action first. So flap your wings, and don't be afraid of the tornado that follows. You created your fear, and only you can survive in the wake of it.
I wrote this letter to myself. I'm preparing to travel again. In a little less than a month, I'll be on the road to Oregon. I don't have much of a plan this time, all I know is it's time to go.
**
Breeze-Mist Aug 2017
You could very well
Say that American ways
Are "bizarre" or "odd"

But I have seen some
British soldiers taking
Portraits with a sheep
As an American (who is aware that we have our own share of oddities), there is no explanation that makes two soldiers in full uniform taking a formal photo with a sheep outside of barracks a block from Buckingham Palace less weird.
Aaron LaLux Jul 2017
Till Thee End (In The Name of Love)

I’m like those freaks on the street that keep babblin’,
but my pockets are deep and I keep round the world traveling,

stress out no doubt life’s a trip which is why we’re falling in love,
in too deep flying off the cliff from a Leap of Faith in the Name of Love,

free fallin’,
I hear Heaven calling,
out my name,
“Aaron, Aaron.”,

wake up,
the show’s almost over,
you’ve contributed so much,
we should grant you an Oscar,

stage of life we all play our parts,
your art is something I’m in love with,

falling over again all in ready to go,
over the edge as we free fall everything is slow mo,

motion like oceans of waves in to deep in the deep blue see we go,

the whole show we go like the most brilliant Star burning up the universe,

the brightest Black Hole like a night in the dark where we shine like day glow,

oh,
I know,
it’s all more than just a bit intense,
and that’s,
okay,
because we are Heaven Sent,

received an RSVP to Heaven,
and of course I said “Hell Yes!”,

over zealous,
with reasons for this,
I’ve got grown men that depend,
on my money as their salary,

in too deep,
in the deep blue see,
see I used to be a runaway,
ran away and was raised by the streets,
so this whole business life is a little new to me,
I mean,
the exact fact is I’m not having kid,
in fact I’m donating everything I own to charity,
and to Nature Conservatories I will hand over all my properties,
see I’ve got all the responsibility in the world,
just have to learn how to manage it properly,

I’m probably,
talking to much again,
but I’m sorry I’m not sorry,
because you’ll understand if you’re a true friend,

till The End,

I’m like those freaks on the street that keep babblin’,
but my pockets are deep and I keep round the world traveling,

stress out no doubt life’s a trip which is why we’re falling in love,
in too deep flying off the cliff from a Leap of Faith in the Name of Love,

till The End…

∆ Aaron LA Lux ∆
new book available worldwide:
https://www.amazon.com/dp/1548700746
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