I’d drink poison if it tasted like you
I’d let God banish me from heaven if you were my sentence
Let the rainfall wash me away if it cleansed me of all my faults
Let Earth swallow me if you grew a garden from my rot
Mold myself into your favorite shape if I were clay
Run towards the sun if you flew too close
So I could feel you burning through my veins

You’re the 119th chemical element
You run your course through me
Devouring me like malignancy
Your golden blaze bruised me
Your mark like a moon’s crater
Your absence blues me
Your ***** eyes, a trancing taser

So let me die a thousand times within your orbit
I will attempt eternity
You are my ruin
And I, your devoted human

I refused
To listen to friends and family
Who warned me what will come
I refused
To look at the signs and flags
That told me to go back
I refused
To make boundaries and lines
Out of self-respect
I refused
To stand tall and put my foot down
When I kept getting hurt
I refused
To give up what we have
Even though you were long gone
I refused
To allow myself to process
To let myself break down
I refused
Even though time has passed
And the pain settled in
I refused
Despite all the heartbreak and pain
To stop loving you

Who the hell you think you are?
to take my spark
you were meant to light it
not dim it
now it just flickers
barely alive

Who the hell you think you are?
to make my eyes
lose their sight
with the very tears
that once searched for your smile

Who the hell you think you are?
to make the hand
that reached for you
bleed

Who the hell you think you are?
to scar the skin
that once stayed soft for you

Who the hell you think you are?
to shatter the heart
that only beat your name

Who the hell you think you are?
to make a body
live like it’s dying
just because
it loved you

WHO THE HELL YOU THINK YOU ARE!!!?

________________

Who the hell you think you are?
to give your spark away
to someone who dimmed it

Who the hell you think you are?
to let your tears fall
until your vision faded

Who the hell you think you are?
to let your fingers bleed
for someone who never reached back

Who the hell you think you are?
to let them write pain
onto your skin

Who the hell you think you are?
to hand your heart over
only to watch it break

Who the hell you think you are?
to let someone
bury you in silence
while you're still breathing

Who the hell you think you are?
to let them hurt you
and call it love

WHO THE HELL YOU THINK YOU ARE!!!?

Who the hell you think you are ?
to make me hate my self
to make angry on myself
to make me regret the choices I made

WHO THE HELL YOU THINK YOU ARE!!!?

Russel was given the nickname ‘Knowsy’,
Because he knew just about anything.
If the signs weren’t apparent, like the glasses on his nose,
Russel was a nerd, and believe me, Russel knows.
Whenever someone needed help on a test,
“Russel knows,” and he dealt with the rest.
When the **** needed to finish his homework,
“Russel knows,” and then the **** forced him to work.
Oh, the curse of knowledge,
How the nerd turns from a laughing stock to a precious commodity.
Reduced from a human,
To a know-it-all without an identity beyond his brain.
Russel hated how he knew this pain.
Haley needed a favor,
An assignment was due,
And she couldn’t afford to fail.
So she went to Russel,
Not knowing about his crush,
Would his heart prevail?
He was skeptical,
Why was the prettiest girl in the world talking to him?
He had envisioned this in his head,
But it was only hypothetical.
Russel knew that it was too good to be true,
When the first words she said were,
“What did you get on number two?”
He was being used…again.
Russel knows how it feels to have your smarts be used against you.
Russel knows how knowledge can wound you.
Russel knows these things to be true.

I've seen love burn like wildfires—
Born of passion, but doomed by desires.
Engulfed in flames of anger and darkness,
Consuming hearts to war and madness.

They spiral, trying to quench the pain,
Only to stoke the fumes again.
They kept burning, burning, and burning—
Until all that’s left were charred bones and yearning.

You say I pulled away.
You're right.
But before I left,
I withered beneath the weight of your storm.

I didn’t mean to become the silence
you dreaded waking up to.
But every slammed door,
every name spat like venom,
taught me how to become invisible.

You think I planned it —
as if my tattoos were eulogies for us,
my piercings an escape route.
No.
They were armor.
Each needle a promise to myself
that I still existed
underneath the noise.

I loved you.
God, I did.
When we laughed,
it felt like we’d invented language.
When we touched,
I thought the world forgave us.

But I was bleeding
while trying to bandage your rage.
And in the quiet after your anger,
I started to disappear.

I wasn’t waiting to leave —
I was hoping you’d notice I was drowning.
But you were too busy
trying to prove you were already underwater.

And I know my hands weren’t clean.
I bit back,
with sarcasm, with silence,
with withdrawal.
We hurt each other
because we didn’t know
how not to.

You were my home.
But I couldn’t survive the fires
you kept lighting inside the walls.

So I left.
And I still ache —
because I wanted us to grow,
not burn.

To me, you speak
"Oh dear, give me your heart"
"Why should I?"
You look at me softly
A wistful gleam
In the surface
Of your right eye
A smile curving
Up on your lips
Just barely
A traitorous sight indeed
As you slowly say
"Because I gave you mine"