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elowen morey Apr 2017
on a scale of 1-10
I am terrified
terrified of putting myself out there just for it to be ignored
or even worse
unnoticed
yes I like you
do you like me?
is there anything I can do to help?
please just give it a chance
it won’t hurt to try
i’ll be here
waiting
Krysha Apr 2017
Towering buildings, 2-seater cars, Fancy things
A day in the city, a day in the real jungle
Uneasiness' drawn by my face
Where's my game-face on?
Andrew Fahey Feb 2017
Totally terrified
Of ending up
Exactly
Like everybody
Else is
elizabeth Feb 2017
The anger screams at
My mind.
The pain rips apart
My soul.
The shame hides
My face.
The sadness climbs down
My cheeks.
The trauma reminds me
Every day.
February 21, 2017.
By: Jack Wilder (Ramon Carlos T. Castillo)

You, terrify me,
I run, faster than a speeding stallion,
Distressed and lost,
Nowhere to go,
Almost taking flight,
As I gallop the way,
From the speed of running away,
Or am I really?
Trying to getting away from you?
Because here I am,
Too curious and searching for clues,
Wishing I get nearer, warmer,
Only to find out, you take a new form,
And as I feel it,
The space between us,
Only goes wider,
The between gap us grows bigger,
As every second passes,
I lose track of who you truly are,
But I admire you,
And the mystery that you are,
Because as I feel the distance growing,
As fast as lightning without making a sound,
You come back just to haunt me,
And you just follow me around,
Like my shadow in the woods,
As the night gets darker,
The moon goes fuller and brighter,
You grow instantaneously,
Creeping silently, just beneath me,
Clueless that I am of your identity,
I want to know,
But how can I find out?
When you're just a silhouette of me,
The sun just won't come,
And you're about to pounce,
I would like to repeat this,
You, terrify me.
So back then when I was just a kid I always felt like someone or something was following me around, and I got to writing down about it.
She's gone now.
She's still my friend, but she doesn't understand.
I'll never have her back, and now my world truly is bland.
She's not dead, but she's not mine, and I'm supposed to deal with that somehow.

But what hurts is that for months she wanted to be just friends.
I messed up, I was too mean, I wasn't enough.
I know her words aren't bluff.
We're in too deep to make amends.

If she wanted to be friends for so long,
she won't change her mind.
How could I have been so blind?
Without her, I'm not strong.

I don't think she cares.
She said that nothing will change, it's just a title.
I guess those two years just weren't that vital.
I think I'm the only one shedding tears.

One day, she'll say she's with someone else.
And I'll remember again, that she'll never be mine.
Our story has reached the end of the line.
When I see her, my heart no longer melts.

I can't stop crying.
Our breakup must be my fault, I wasn't strong.
She's too perfect to have done anything wrong.
I think I'm dying.

I don't want to be here if she's not mine.
I wish the world could fade away.
How cruel, to do this near my birthday.
But I take that back, as I do every time I walk this stupid line.

She said that she could change her decision.
I told her she won't, but I said thanks for thinking she might.
I can't give myself false hope, when it's just going to make me cry at night.
I broke my own heart with my own perfect precision.

I deserve this pain.
I don't deserve to be happy, that I can see.
Everyone just sees me as a worthless flea.
Two years, down the drain...

I don't want to sleep.
Food is bland to me.
I'm annoying, I agree.
All I do now is weep.

You can say I'll get over it, and that I'll be okay.
But I won't be, because she was there when no one else was.
She loved me when I didn't even love myself, she was my late gift from Santa Claus.
But I'll be stuck seeing her, knowing she will never be mine, everyday.

I trusted, and my trust fell through as always.
I was hurt, when I thought it wouldn't happen.
But it's my fault. It always is. As always, I'm the one lacking.
I'm going to be afraid of everything now, for forever and a day.
Tab Nov 2016
i haven't left my bed in almost 2 days
the blankets keep me sheltered and safe
there's love in these blankets
here i am free to be me
free to be black
free to be gay
just free
there is no one telling me to "go pick cotton" or to "get to the back of the bus"
i'm allowed to love who i want without worrying someone is going to throw a brick at me
there are no slurs in here
i'm free
*i'm safe
will i have to stay in my bed for 4 years just to be safe?
Sam Oct 2016
Already knowing what someone is going to say,
is worse than hearing it for the first time.

I face dissatisfaction,
I face disappointment,
I face shame.

My intentions are contrary to what some may predict.

I am strong,
I am able,
I am independent.

To be given trust is all I ask,
and I shall never ask anything in return.
Sam Oct 2016
I travel through the maze,
never knowing where to turn.

I think in my mind,
the paths traveled before,
so I know which way to avoid.

My heart beats with fear,
Anxiety pushes on my chest with all its force.

I can't turn, I can't move.
The element of surprise,
Showing up at any moment.

I can't handle.
I'm terrified.

Every bend I come across,
every slight indication,
I panic.

I can't help it,
*That's me
aa Jul 2016
i am scared of not being loved.
i am scared that when im 45 years old,
i will climb to bed alone,
wishing, regretting.
i am scared of not being worthy of love.
i believe in true love and soulmates,
i just don't believe that it's for me.

i am terrified.
what if they find my body days after i died, all alone in my bedroom?
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