Dostoyevsky said, “your worst sin is that you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for nothing.”

I've felt rage seething in my chest for as long as I can remember. I've felt as his talons ripped open my sternum, digging for a place to call home. this rage has nestled deep into my ribcage, devouring my will to survive while carelessly residing within my nightmares.

I've surrendered to this forsaken depression fury has vacated deep in the confines of my irises - despite witnessing myself across grey-tinted glasses; a smoldering storm rippling miasma throughout my body, manipulating my hands into a devout pyromaniac; suffocating every chance to heal.
I've known nothing but bitterness congesting my heart. My dreams were burdened dreadfully with the stench of wrath. it mutilated my arms; burrowing into capillaries, and asphyxiating my habit to vanish.

This incessant sin I've endured has brought me to my knees, existing only to ***** out my ability to be a mortal in an unforgiving universe. I am not a cosmic metaphor, the iron residing underneath my skin has become impenetrable.

I am adorned with stillness while this betrayal has bloomed into a supernova. the things in which I lack have ignited into an endlessly violent explosion -

Atomizing my bones, swirling stardust into a forlorn emptiness.
A world that was held by the unfaltering resistance I persevered against, it has ravaged my memories, my moribund existence trembled; shivering from the growl of the recoil - the remnants of creation kissed abysmal lips within the faraway distance of a boundless abyss, raining tears for the last time as the destruction leaves a life void of meaning.

The last words ever heard in this universe spoke softly as if to lull the existential bereft into a long hiatus -

"This was all for nothing, just as destitute as this vacant nothingness, human life is ill-fated to be star-crossed and powerless."

Don't make a
SOUND, the settling
of COMPLETE STILLNESS,
So, QUIET that
you could
HEAR A PIN DROP,
The CALMNESS is SO EERIE,
it could make your
HEART STOP,
or even SKIP A BEAT,
the SOUND of
MICE SCURRYING,
along the
WOODEN FLOOR,
as you step and
the FLOOR CREAKS,
realizing that THE WOOD
floor PANEL IS WEAK,
The STILL of
the DARK in a
SILENT ROOM,
Where the only LIGHT
you have BEAMS
down from the MOON,
through your
WINDOW PANE,
The MOON ILLUMINATES
just so much
LIGHT,
ENABLING you could SEE,
As it SHINES THROUGH
the DARKNESS and
YOUR CALM and at EASE,
The ROOM is so STILL,
THE ROOM IS SO CALM, but
SOON MORNING SHALL ARRIVE
AS WE WELCOME
THE NEW DAWN!!!


B.R.
DATE: 1/22/2024