Perhaps all your exes do better after you for a reason
Perhaps my words are aimed to hurt
You
And now that I know they could
I wouldn’t  mind if they do
Cause perhaps I am still sour
From the taste of your love
And its deep, light consuming
hole in my soul

Someone once told me :
always remember that,
some people come into your life to make chaos.
and some people and come into your life to show love.

Some people will use you
Some people will always be there for you
Some people will be true
Some people will lie
Sometimes you will learn from a mistake
Sometimes you fall and that’s okay.

Sometimes you’ll  fall in love to hard
Sometimes you’ll cry alone
But you’ll be okay even if you’re alone

I am simply a lemon
I like to think I’m sweet
But I am just a sour soul that you can never eat


I am simply a lemon
with bright happy yellow skin
But, on the inside I am just a sin


Add a bit of sugar and I’ll be bitter sweet
But once the sugar fades away your destin for defeat

I am not a sweet little boy
I’m sour as can be
Why am I a lemon and not a strawberry

i want the butterflies
glowing in my lungs
whispering nervous truths

i crave the breath
catching in my throat
warm bodies brought together

i'd **** for dancing
physical, verbal, tantric
never knowing who is leading
---
i miss first dates
the hopeful feeling fraught with nerves
fidgeting as you giggle at jokes that aren't funny

and all the learning,
favorite colors that grow to anecdotes
and then to second dates

all the time it's blossoming;
blooming into something real,
butterflies depart, letting only light remain

and i can stop the pining easily
love songs are vibrant; poetry melts hearts
but don't romanticize me
---
i've been the final girl at a haunted house
cleaning up bodies; exercising ghosts
i don't need your love to be full

i don't have another half, i'm already whole
and you can be my twin flame, if you won't fizzle out
i've had many matches that only left smoke
---
and if our love is a circus, and you are the clown
don't be surprised if i wait in the crowd
i'm done pulling teeth; and i'm tired of games
friend, lover, soulmate- i'm tired of names

i'm tired of labels that differ but all feel the same.
when i'm set alight, i'll be feeling no shame
and if you want all of me, i'll have no regrets
but don't string me along, i'm no marionette

red eyes, green wine, weak smiles, hollow cheeks, shallow drips.

Dark, not Black.

a desire to be linear, now crowded with curves
sickly sweet
sarcastically sour
no longer sweet, just sour


hot on cold, cold on hot, sweet and sour but sour and sour
tick tick tick, did it feel?
tick tick tick, did you feel?
failed when born, how can change it all, before dawn?

I guess I was amassing a collection
So I could show my children all the places I’ve ate

Like little milestones

All the places I’ve had dead end dates

All the places I’ve gorged myself
Having just got off work
Or just smoked a bowl
Either way I felt deserving of a feast

All the places I shared stories with friends
All the places we shared kisses before we went in

All the orange chicken I ate to help sober up
All the take out I ordered when we broke up
And that one place I found out I was allergic to shrimp and threw up

Yeah I remember it all
The egg rolls, the soup, the soy sauce
The painting of pandas or dragons
The red lanterns
All the motifs
You seemingly needed to run an establishment
Like this

There are the stand outs
The Lucky Star whose pork fried rice was just cut up Slim Jims
The Panda House who treated me less like a customer and more like a friend
If I didn’t come around, they would call and ask where I had been

It didn’t matter if it was in a mall or in my small home town
I always found comfort in this other culture’s food
So while I’m waiting for all those fountain cookies to come true
I guess I’ll look back over these dozen Chinese menus

The flowing lava,
destroys,
burns,
hurts,
kills,
overwhelms,
turns my blood to molten magma,
and yet makes feel so alive.

                                                                             -storm-