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Olivia Catalina Dec 2018
He is the can of Red Bull shaking in my hand.
At first sip he does nothing for me,
but then he slowly begins to take effect.
My heart accelerates,
my breathing quickens,
And I soon slip into the next world.
I feel like I’m floating whenever he’s in my system.
My feet are several inches from the ground,
and my head is in the clouds,
and I can’t seem to come down from this high he left me with.

She is the flag adorning my bedroom wall.
A memory fabricated from the ocean,
the stars,
shopping trolleys,
and the sound of fabric being torn at the seams.
She cannot be wiped from my mind,
nor can all the nights we’ve spent together.
Not that I would ever wish to forget about them.

I am the wordless demon that haunts their every waking hour.
The one who dreams of them with ardour,
and the one whose words come across as too strong.
I have been told I bat my eyes too often
and that my smiles occasionally seem more than just friendly.
I have been told that my touch is too tender,
and my motives are too selfish.
I have been told that I am the devil.
Myrrdin Dec 2018
Am I trying to help you
Because your pain
Is too much for you to bear
Or because seeing you like this
Is too much for me to bear
fiachra breac Dec 2018
never content:
withholding love out of what?
fear? envy? greed? sadness?

how i long for peace, stability and change...

a constant contradiction. barreling from heart to heart -
never finding ground long enough to lose myself
in someone else’s arms.

feelings stronger after i tear them out.

have to look at them in the air in front of my eyes.
bleeding, dripping their blood on the carpet,
heart beating in my hands.
to be clinically inspected and torn apart
only to discover that this was what i wanted all along.

like a tree, felled to tell its age,
dead, but finally understood.
too late to say,
“ah! look how old it’s branches, how deep its roots, how wonderful it’s shade!”

dead. dead and decomposing on the floor.

will i always glorify love lost over love in front of my eyes?
an outburst found in my notes. dated 3rd nov 2018. I will wreck this, and it will be hell.
Sudipta Maity Nov 2018
Survival in nature is always
a selfish process.
Whereas, Nature itself
built selflessly.
In nature difference between selfishness and selflessness has surpising facts.
Leigh Nov 2018
.

My everything swelled

Until my fear grew legs

So to carry me from you

And your everything too

.
At all costs.
Gianna Nov 2018
darling,
(can i call you that?)
how i wish that i could hold you again
how i wish that only you could see
that way that my heart is breaking
when you bring up the way you hold someone else
and when you carelessly remind me
of the way
you lack to feel
for me
how selfish of you
Elisa Holly Nov 2018
I sit on her couch
Sipping *****
from some mixed concoction
Scrolling through the social media experiences
meant to be a self reassurance
of how good we have it
when it’s just so
******* hard.

These little positives accumulated
to remind myself
that even in the midst of my hardest trials,
don't get caught in the failures
but relish in the triumphs.

I don’t even look at the other feeds
so self absorbed
at reminding myself
that each day my hustle
will be rewarded with the ultimate win: love.
But success isn’t love... or a like
and every minute I spend self absorbed on what I don’t have
I miss out
on the minute to minute love
I receive with each interaction
from people I share space with.
Life isn’t a feed.
Life isn’t happiness every day.
Life isn’t measured by the have or have nots.
Life is this moment.
Life is this experience
and the decisions we make in them.

So I closed the phone
and listened
to her
sing.

She wasn’t doing it for the hashtag
or the like
and I listened.

Sipping on my *****,
closing my eyes.
I didn’t care what was seen
as long as she kept sharing
this moment with me.

The feed.
Social media
Nightkeeper Nov 2018
sometimes
we are selfish
sometimes
we are selfless
and there's no in between.
Deanna Nov 2018
i didn't want it to end this way
i didn't want to leave you
i didn't want to hurt you
but i didn't want to hold on to be selfish
and hold on to you when i knew
you'd be better off without me
and i was right
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