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In I came to Dublin town,
Riding one fine morning,
I spied some Johnny Bullies
And I started off a'cussing!

Leave my home,
Go on get out.
Leave the whiskey,
Leave the grub.
Tell the king
To go *******
And stay in his doe-hog hovel.

O'er glens of An Cabhán
There flew a rag of red,
I tore it off from where it hung
And ripped it all to shreds!

Leave my house,
You're unwelcome.
Leave the rope & iron.
Tell the king
To go *******,
Lest he would rather violence.

In Londonderry & Belfast,
Pleasant little branches,
We'll grow ourselves gigantic oaks
Uproot their picket fences!

Leave my home,
Go on get out.
Leave the whiskey,
Leave the grub.
Tell the king
To go *******
And stay in his doe-hog hovel.

Say the hounds are all but slept,
Yet I still hear the barking.
I think it restful pouting
Readying for a real good bouting!

Leave my house,
You're unwelcome.
Leave the rope & iron.
Tell the king
To go *******,
Lest he would rather violence.

Hard to find good honest work,
When of royal or noble;
Hard to find good honest work
If they claim you're not loyal!

Leave my home,
Go on get out.
Leave my house,
You're unwelcome.
Tell the king
To go *******,
And kindly don't respond.
Johnny Poodle/Noodle - Yankee Doodle

John Bull - Personification of England
A'cussing - Cussing, as in cursing, but also accusing.
Doe-hog hovel - Buckingham Palace
Rag of Red - Union Jack
Grub - Foodstuffs
Rope & Iron - Noose & Cutlass
Pleasant little branches - Douglas Ross Hyde, first President of the Irish Democratic Republic. Young advocates of full Irish independence.

Just a fun shanty
Itself made evident
By the very discourse & action
In which sees your engagement.
Others around you protest,
But they are written off
Just as wrong, as haters.

There is nothing
So much as struck lightning
Or the entirety of the Earth shaking
Which could wake you from your rest,
Unpeel your eyes, of
The curtains drawn by slumber.

Whatever such natural event;
The magma already cooled,
The fault line already cracked,
The water has already receded.

It already happened.

You went exploring down a river
And ended up stuck on an island,
The boat's left adrift
And you can't remember how to swim.

Where have you gone?
Where are you?
Where have you been?
Mencius, what is that they're doing?

Zhǐ! Another immortal walked from the sea;
Leaf & cordage finely chopped,
Throughly masticated & combined,
Left to the air to then reside
And collected after dried.
How most strange & curious!

You say the nobility call this parchment,
But for humor as irony
And because of the sound made
During the process of hammering,
The craftsmen call it paper?
And, like with tattoos,
They use pastes & fluids like dyes & resins
To stain drawings, shapes, and characters?

The lesser the weight of tablets,
Well-traveled with, easily read & clearly,
Markable with ease; readily inviting change
After change, reflecting our fragileness & resilience, offering record of our thoughts & accomplishments, a chance for the more prolific scribe and the library diverser & denser?

How wonderous a creation,
How gifted the craftsmen,
How genius the inventors.


Wow. That was so long ago
Before I was born.
But then compared to much else,
This fledgling has yet to have flown
From the small enclaves it nests as home.
It's really easy to write
Like you're for the hardline right
And far-flung conspiracies.
Easy to address as a member of the left
Like you believe in extreme liberalism
And wild ideas.
And then there's a center,
Or so I've heard.
For the intellectual or versus,
For the institution or against;
For the fascist,
For the anarchic.

It's all so archaic.
Then there was man
Who fought the wild
Braved the winter
Dodged the sun
Made the fire
Rode a wheel
Tilled the land
Dug the sand
Brought water
Carved cities
Read books
Pulled the trigger
Went to space
Ruled a people
Left a *****
A fragile Y
That has to
Somehow
Beat 2X
To stay in the fight...
High, high, high
Up in the southern sky
On cloud nine
My penthouse looks divine

Low, low, below
I see them moving slow
Lesser mortals, lowlives:
A Dog Civilization thrives

They can’t move fast
For they aren’t destined to last
They bark and they fight
Eat, **** and mate day and night

In houses and on streets
They live with whosoever greets
And though they stink
They claim they can think

Now from my penthouse I see
Another penthouse way above me
From there on my foot, a bone fell
Enchanted, I started wagging my tail.
Robert Ippaso Jan 24
And now it starts,
And yes, I'm back at last,
Four years of trials and tribulations,
Capped off by this raucous jubilation.

I fought and won,
Proved them all wrong,
The denigrators,
The fake media perpetrators.

Now watch them squirm
As I storm into my term,
So much to do,
A solemn promise made to you.

I ask why was I spared,
When into death's eyes I clearly stared,
But when that moment I re-live,
This is what I’m here to now achieve:

Stop the woke,
Don't call a girl, a bloke.
Make us safe,
In this our home, our sacred place.

Make us strong,
So that bad actors do no wrong,
Aim to win,
Proving we are made of steel not puny tin.

Stem the divide,
For racism I simply shan't abide.
Democrats so played this ruse,
Our democracy to harness and abuse.

Let law and order thrive,
Reclaim our streets - our cities to revive,
Where children learn that doing right,
Is what gave our nation majesty and might.


For merit alone to be the glue,
So that we build and not undo,
Step up and take the strain,
Choose sunshine over rain.

Vet the folks that we let in
Ones that work and help us win;
Stop the thugs that sow despair,
See how much they truly dare.

My time may however prove too short,
But no promise made will I abort,
I’ll fight for you with all my might
To make our future prosperous and bright.

So thank-you America and watch this tale,
As the train to Woke I thoroughly derail,
No time to waste, I’m working fast,
Ensuring all that’s bad we quickly blast!
This is a parody of course - however pretty close to what Trump would say I'm sure.
Devin Johns Dec 2024
Always be just fine.
Stay out of trouble.
Get back in the line.
Build you a bubble.

Don’t ever gamble.
Give up your dreaming.
Best not to ramble.
***** out your scheming.

Never should you rave.
Don’t you take a risk.
Always best to cave.
Abide the tsk tsk tsk.
dead poet Dec 2024
mud in rainwater
bubbles with irreverence;
a dog steps on it.
Devin Johns Dec 2024
I’m a man,
and so I can.

I can walk alone at night,
for only cowards get a fright.
I can post my real last name.
This life for me is just a game.
I can look them in the eye
(as long as I don’t start to cry).
I can curse and yell and shout.
That is what I’m all about.
Assertive is the way to be.
I'm the boss. Now can't you see?

I can dress how I would like.
I can ride a reg’lar bike.  
I can bend or squat or sit
with legs spread wide. I am the ****.
My gender, I don’t qualify.
Default is he, and so am I.  

And when I spit, I draw no looks.
My undergarments have no hooks.
My hair just sits as it was made,
distinguished as it starts to fade.
I can slap my gut with pride.
She said me too, but that ***** lied.
My pain is real; my anger, too.
And I don't have to use the loo.

Dear daughter, won’t you try to be  
a big strong man as safe as me?
For my amazing daughter, may she always be safe and respected.

I was going for a Shel-Silverstein-meets-Ani-DiFranco kinda thing.

(For those unfamiliar with American slang, “I am the ****” translates “I am so great.”)
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