Express with me
Breathe less with me
Undress with me
Make a mess of me

Break me
Make me
Take from me
Do anything but ache for me

Leave me
Deceive me
Free me
Do anything but be with me

When you said we were done
I initially was angry because
I wanted to hate you so badly
But I only loved you.

A few days later,
I realize that, though I do love you
more than anything,
A part of me also resents you.
And maybe my anger was not,
In fact, because I couldn't hate you,
But because I knew a part of me does
And all I want to do is love you.

The last time you asked if I hated you for ending it;
I couldn't, because I understood.
But this time, you didn't ask
You didn't care
And I'm not sorry that I wasn't good enough,
Because you're the one who couldn't
Handle the distance.
Let your cravings and desires
Override a love
To where you couldn't feel it anymore.

I wish I could understand,
But I can't.
And I resent you for hurting me this way.
At least before I knew you still loved me,
Now I couldn't even tell you liked me.

Enjoy your freedom and experience
While I'm trapped as a prisoner
To my own mind.
The dreams of you continue and
Waking up hurts more than I can explain.
But I love you.
And, unfortunately, that will never change.

Face it,
I'm a follow up.
To use all this time and quickly cast aside?
Honey, I'm not so simple to avoid.
I'll make sure
to close up for you one day.

maybe if i hold my breath for a little while longer
everything would start to fade and
my vision would start with a tinge of darkness
to black out your face as
you spit out your words of hatred
that must taste so foul falling from your lips
but don't worry, darling, i know you're afraid of showing kindness
so i'll turn them into words of affection
(and maybe all i wanted was to feel worthy of
something other than the sadness that had started to
gnaw its way inside my mind to the point of contentment)

Every time you swear you love me I can't help but wonder if you've said the same thing to her. Do you say ithat in the same breath? Would you dare? I wish I was more surprised at your sudden disappearance but old habits die hard, right? You insist that you love me but your actions have always spoken louter than your ******* words. And I am always a fool for thinking anything different. I am consistently broken by you because I want to believe you so badly. I want someone to love me that much, and to love them back without fear. I hope you know I'm not a game or a toy to only be played with when you feel like it or when it's convenient for you. I will hate myself for always letting you in and you will always manipulate your way. I should've  known better. I hope you read this and know that you ****** up. Don't expect forgiveness and don't think that I will ever forget.

Daddy's little girl
she just can't see
She thinks daddy loves mommy but how can that be
Does he love with his fist
Or is it when her face meets his knee

What mommy doesn't give
Daddy takes
Poor baby girl doesn't know that's how she was made
And although the bruises fade
Mommy can never look at him the same
But in his daughter's eyes she doesn't want him to change
She's still hoping to marry a man like daddy someday


Daddy's little girl
Blinded by his love and the things she can't see
Daddy loves mommy
just a little differently
With his fist
not his heart
But how can that be

In his daughter's eyes
He's the sun
the moon
and the stars
But if only she could see mommy's scars

The pure taste so very sweet
On my bitter tongue

I hate you

The sum of all my being can't describe this anxious resentment 
I have towards you

Its not that I'm being obsessive

I can get over you easily

Its what you did that I can't stand

You and your Hippocratic oath

And nonchalant  pessimism

Do you know how much I cared

Can you even conceive what you did

.....of course not

And you're not sorry for it either  

For the most part

In your mind

You did nothing wrong at all

I guess snakes don't feel bad when they constrict mice to pop and stay and that position till its heart stops then gorges itself without chewing

What a circle of life

But why me

What satisfaction did doing what you did make it ok

Is this humanity

Ever memory now scrapes at me

Atleast I can see the signs

To avoid another like you

Even though it's not so simple

You sickening peace of ****

You don't belong

You've taken a piece and given me something I didn't want in the first place

Now every time I see you smile

Or see you 

Even a picture

Or a phrase that sickens me to the point

Drugs are my only salvation

Just to keep the pain away

Just to take the pain away

But that doesn't matter

It never will


So on those nights when I ache in my chest in curl in a ball and wonder if I  can let go or pay you back

I wish sweet dreams to the ones you haven't hurt 

And it is as my face appears

It is mangled underneath by acid tears