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A Whitney Oct 2014
I'm struggling with some things and it makes me depressed as I don't feel in control and I've been staring at the Google home page for a good hour or so now and I'm still no closer to being comfortable in my own skin or figuring out whether I have made the best decisions or if I have quite literally doomed my existence forever.
Kara Oct 2014
i was fine
until i remembered you
and i dont want you back
i just want the past to be my present
and live forever in your room
each day be the same as the last
just you
just me
surrounded by empty cans
listening to that one band
all it took was one smell
a reminder of when days were clearer
and my mind didnt blur
and i may have been sad
but who'd have known i'd be sadder
the days are getting shorter
i dont care
i care to much
i dont want to die
i want to have never existed
Adelina Marie Sep 2014
there's so much more to say
and a lot more to show
but i can't find the right
arrangement of words
to put it all together
so i'll keep it confined to the
spider web of thoughts
locked away in the
innermost part of my mind
you're the only thing that
makes me feel anymore and
i crave your touch so i can
come alive again
for i've been dead so long;
a corpse with a beating heart
and i have done nothing to fix it
yet i lay here day in
and day out
thinking about how
we long for days that
may not exist and
the sunrises and
sunsets that are
existing without our eyes
in awe at their beauty
the stars that come out and
the wishes we aren't making on
them
the heartbeats that aren't syncing
the love we aren't making
the breath we aren't sharing and
simply the life we aren't living
i'd love to tell you all this because
there is so much more to
a feeling than an
initial explanation
but i'm just me
and you are all of you...
i shouldn't love you





but ****





i do.
An aimless rambling.
murielle lemaire Sep 2014
things stolen and broken and empty promises are why you trust
no one.
I've learned not to believe a word that falls from their mouths.

Wishing wells can't do anything but collect spare hopes
in the form of spare change.

My whole life is a poem.
I walk
I run
I feel and i thinkandido
and everything is some grand art project for the gods.
They must be crazy.
Setting the universe spinning for entertainment purposes only.
My cynic meaning of life.
We're just a blink of an eye,
a firefly flash in the night.
Aver Sep 2014
thoughts cram themselves once more tonight
of all failures and doubts
pain and tears
scars
some are mine some are others
but my soul feels them all the same
in my head, my hope has been dead
but i've learned to revive myself
i wish i held the power to heal all of their wounds
but i do not believe in wishes
however i do believe in change
and dreams
dreams are lovely
lovely partners to nightmares
life is a lovely partner to death
which i do not believe in either
K Fitzgerald Aug 2014
i was trying to figure out
the meaning of life
when it hit me like your fingers
in the twang of the earth’s guitar:
one day i will be
sitting, alone, in the sweltering dust
of the crossroads, with the reed-
blow of the wind, the blood
of the grass,
the bang of the silent
hitchhiker looking for a
way to carry his swallowed whiskey
and then i’ll know.
i’ll know.
Spencer Dennison Aug 2014
I've been spending a lot of time awake lately
and while I've been spending this time
watching the clock...
It really makes me realize
that he is not in any kind of hurry.

It's all a little bit blurry.
Something about a girl and
an idea.
An idea wrapped in symbolism,
Cloaked in metaphors,
all chains and locked doors.

I've been spending hours draped over furniture
like a coat being thrown away after a long day.
I can empathize with the way
a dog barks up a storm when his master comes home
Because I missed you.
Maybe not in the way that allows me to feel happy when you're back
but you're as much a part of me
as diabetes is to heart attacks.

I wish you would go and just stay gone.
Get hung up somewhere and just never return.
But it took me only this long to learn
that youre never going away.
I issue restraining orders every single day
but you'll still be tapping in my window by morning.

And I'll open the window
And take you in my arms and kiss you.
I'll say "Welcome back, Depression.
I sure did miss you."
ab Aug 2014
everyone wants something and everyone doesn't want to be alone. to be lonely. that ***** man with sad eyes sitting on the sidewalk, alone and in the rain. passing, passing, passing. passing time, passing people, passing lives. or maybe you're in your home, 500 floors up. still alone, but in luxury. that isolated woman with lonely eyes and red lips and faux fur and classy cigarettes. parent's never paid much attention. both live alone, wanting a crossing of paths with someone, anyone. different spectrum of societies, suicide to be seen together. it was raining, the young woman being into the alley by men. they wanted her money. greedy, greedy, greedy. she was the youngest of the family, her family living in more extravagant places than she. she'd never be missed until the money ran out. she would die, she knew she would, shivering in the rain as they ripped off her expensive coat, pulling her hair. somehow she felt okay, at least if they killed her she wouldn't be alone. there was only darkness between her and her death, streaks of lightning lighting the terror on her smudged face. the ***** man sitting along the wall could see the woman in the white coat, not even fighting for her life. he didn't understand that, almost angered. she had money, had everything. he had nothing, even less as he got up and splashed his way through the dark to grab one of the men by the throat. he was choking, coughing as he kicked him down and his partner ran off. they hadn't expected to be challenged. the woman was pleading, her coat in a puddle. she was taking off her jewelry, shoving it into the man's hand. he shook his head, seeing the loneliness in the eyes of the woman, her dark hair wet and frizzy. she didn't seem to understand as he merely placed her jewelry in her coat and wrapped it back around her shoulders, despite it being cold and wet. they were both already cold and wet. she was frazzled, perplexed, and finally she hugged the man, sobbing in tune with the rain. they went separate ways, the woman getting to her lonely warm penthouse and stripping out of her wet clothes. they lay all over the floor along and the she laid naked on the rug. she didn't want to move, shakily opening her cigarettes as she rolled on her back. the next afternoon she was back outside, tired and silent as she wandered back into the alley. she felt empty, staring at the place where she could have met her end. she ripped off her rings and her pearls, hitting the muddy puddles along the wall. and then she heard a voice along the wall, telling her it wasn't really wise to throw away expensive things. it was the same man, standing there in the same wet clothing and sad eyes. sad eyes and lonely eyes. she said it didn't matter if you were alone, and he said he was alone and it mattered since he had nothing. the woman with lonely eyes asked the man with sad eyes if he had something: a home, a wife, children, and he answered no each time. she took his hand, walking him to the end of the alley, saying he could choose to have something. he said he did want something, but didn't know what something even looked like. she said it was okay and they walked together into the elevator to the 500th floor where he found her clothes across the floor, glass shattered in the kitchen. it was a start of something, and he didn't care if it was ugly at first and lonely eyes became a little less lonely and sad eyes became a little less sad. the something he was looking for was in her and the life of not being lonely she was looking for was in him.
Steve Raishbrook Aug 2014
I've lost my sense of home
Walking these city streets so alone
Where do I belong?
Where do I come from?
Questions rush to me,
consuming my mind
This sense of home, ever will I find?

By those around me happy I'm told to be
The house that was my home
So deescalate and unknown
This house can't hold the two of us
I'll pack up my things,
get on that inner city bus

Ride out to the darkness on the edge of town
Lose myself in the faces that frown
Make my way to the river crossing
Falling from the bridge I begin to drown
Until a kindhearted stranger reaches to save me

There's a sadness in his eyes,
a sadness he simply can't disguise
Telling me he also believed the lies
The lies they fed him
The lies that left him homeless and thin

Looking at each other no words are said
I embrace him in my arms, for without him I'd be dead
The simple act of a stranger restored my faith,
my faith in the kindness of man
God might not have for me a master plan

But a second chance to me he granted
Gathering my things I hit the road
Embracing the desire to roam
Out there in the far off distance
A place I can finally call my home.
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