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cupid Nov 2018
i hate so much you referred to be as pretending
as if dressing me as who i am is wrong
as if my name is a lie
i have been pretending to be who you say i am for years
but now that i come clean
i am so angry that this is all only a big deal because you know now
none of it mattered before you got a call from my school
it was whatever before it was brought to your attention
i have felt this way everyday for years
i have been who i am for years
i don’t know how to tell you that you aren’t helping
that you aren’t being supportive
if this were a phase
or just the teenage fever idea of being who i’m not
it would be different
but your words feel like knives
you keep telling me that how i feel about you and my life makes you feel bad
but think that for my mentality to get to that point how did you make me feel
i know that everything is not about me
nothing is
this is all about you isn’t it
all the wasted time my wasted life is going to be
how you won’t let you kid be who he wants
how you would rather a daughter who feels robotic
a daughter that has no feelings
how you would rather your son pretend to be you daughter
you would rather your son feel disgusting and trapped
feel like an inconvenience
an annoyance
feel like all he will ever be is a burden
a misfit
you would rather i fake who i am
answer to the name you forced upon me
live up to not your standards but your expectations
i know you say otherwise but i cannot feel that you want anything than for me to be your picture perfect daughter
that i need to succeed and be what you wished you had been before anything else
before my dreams, my expression, my happiness
you are never ready to tell the person who raised you that you would rather disappear then feel the way you do
but you are ready to play pretend about it until you blow up
i am so ready to pick up and leave
Grace Conde Oct 2018
I hate you,
the way You
make my Heart
twist, dagger in my
chest, sinking, sinking,
my lungs slowly filling, Your
smile the only thing that can save
me. I Love You I'm So Incredibly Sorry
please come back, because without You, I
am Nothing: You are my sun, my moon, and
All My Stars, but I am so tired, and if I could find
a way to push You Out Of My Mind for good, I would,
and how I wish You were Dead, because I am screaming,
but No One Can Hear Me.

Never
Good
Enough.

NeverGoodEnoughNeverGoodEnoughNeverGoodEnough,
I Hate You, my throat burning with Vivid, Unfiltered Hate
for You, every time You Let Me Down, my mind
already bound with your empty promises, my
dear, can't You see? My heart beats for You.
And when You take me in your tender
embrace, slowly putting me back
together, I can finally breathe.
With You, the world rights
on its Axis. Please don't
Hate me, I'm so sorry
I Love You.
Jasmin A Aug 2018
W
I stare at you

                      and there's something


but                      nothing
j.a.
Vinny Chav Jul 2018
I’m such a ******* idiot for trusting you all over again.

Thinking **** would be different but you still have the same people on your phone thinking it’d be different.
Ms Noma Jun 2018
I hate you.
I hate you with everything I have:
My heart, my brain, my liver
My blood is a cold, black river
That flows with the ghosts of our past
The love that you knew wouldn’t last
But you never gave it a chance
You’re the devil that made me dance
How are your ****** doing now?
Did you bed them by selling a vow,
With strict expiration
Just for your elation?
That quick, little second
You’d risk all for I’d reckon
Till one day, “No thanks,
Think I’ll move up the ranks,
To see what I find
A girl more my kind”.
Celeste Jonesey Jun 2018
I hate you
Makes you never understand why
The longing for you back
Is an instinct to me  
To hug you each morning
To say hello to you each day
Makes you never understand why
I love you
Now read it backwards
ella May 2018
taken in by your ways
my emotions as you fade
fade into a picture on the wall
an image in my head
as you become just a memory
i hate you
i hate the way you left
i hate the feeling of your presense stolen from my fingertips
i hate the absent place you left in my heart
the way you never found away to leave my mind
but i love you
i love the way you talked
i love the way you walked
the way you always kept me on the edge of my seat with the gracefulness of your words
but you're gone now
gone for good
and i didn't realize how much i needed you here until you weren't here anymore
until you weren't here for me to hold anymore
until you left me
with no explanations
Grey May 2018
I drive too fast in that car
High speeds and reckless music
The adrenaline stops my brain from thinking of you
Passenger seat I swear you're with me
A ghost
A memory
Your hand entwined with mine we drove
Sunrises, rain and sunsets
Lakes, rivers and mountains
Our adventures are haunting me
Acceleration to blur the memories
A road to burn the hauntings
I find myself realizing you don't think of me
You don't love me
You'd forgotten me
Why are you lingering?
Why do you appear in my dreams?
Why do you haunt my mind?
Why do I love you?
You left.
You ran away with him.
You left when you promised you wouldn't.
You lied when you'd say you would love me Always and Forever.
Deal with the Devil for that soul of mine.
Time May 2018
I hate you,
For when the morning rises,
After a night full of your absence,
Your memories still hover in my mind,
I hate you,
For when I see you,
I seem to go completely numb,
My lips feel like they had been sealed together,
As no sound comes out,
And slowly and unknowingly,
A smile creeps on to my face,
I hate you,
For no matter how much I drink,
Your eyes are still what I see,
In the bottles of alcohol,
I smell your presence in someone else’s arms,
In the drug of forgive and forget,
I hate you,
For saying you will come back,
Only for you to never even look over your shoulder,
To see if I was fine,
Because you knew there was something wrong,
Yet still you left me,
But I hate myself more,
For never being capable of you,
I never deserved you,
I hate myself,
For having to say I hate you,
When I actually love you.
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