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Lunar Dec 2020
So many thoughts but only mumbles when I speak
So many colours but only black when I volunteer
Mouths are closed but the whispers spread
Calm looking but turbulence underneath
The only crack to be seen when in the bathroom mirrors
My gross time is in the millions but net only a few seconds
My thoughts are my taxes

They are my prison guards
My cage
My torturer
But also...
My friends
My comfort
My company
MINE .. so how can I turn me off?

It took me so long to realise
It’s not them.. it’s me.. it’s always been
Instead of digging a way out of my cell I need to find the key hidden within
It’s always been there
I just need to shine the light inside this time
And this time I need to pick it up
And carry it to the door:
The exit of comfort and darkness
The entrance to something new and scary

Will I return when I fail?
Wrong
Will I return IF I fail?



lunar
askq27 Dec 2020
Lying in the bed
Watching a TV
Feelin so upset
Cause there's no one here

Always overthinking
So much sleepless nights
There's a book i'm reading
Affraid to be alone tonight

But i'm still waiting
For you to come
Into my life
And bring me Hope

And i'm still thinking
What you'll be like
Will you ride me
On your motobike

Eating a dinner with relatives
I'm sitting silent as a mouse
Listening to their stories
Can't wait to go back to my house

Dealing with this problem
It made Me so tired
But I need someone
Who will know what I desire

But ir you'll come
Into my life
And bring me hope
And bring me light

I'm sure
I'll bring some good in yours
If only you
Won't let me go
Joseph S Fusaro Dec 2020
universal love
must be
all inclusive
non exclusive
or else it is non-existent.

or whatever...

i let go of needing
i let go of preaching
i’m going to go sit under a tree
i’m tired of thinking
that i learned everything
i’m tired of thinking
anything:

peace.
Anais Vionet Dec 2020
I’m overthinking,
tired of the endless waiting,
about to blow up.

Even my mom sees it.
She starts some cutting remark
only to pull it back.

Me: "Argh! I have this anger, just below the surface."
My brother: "Uhh, it's not that far below the surface."
The universe is rubbing me wrong this week - and it's only Tuesday.
J Dec 2020
all your lovers of summer whisper soundlessly
against my collared [owned]
existence.
airy spirits of longing sleep
unseen by anyone
except me,
and yet these
flickers of response aren't
noticeable.
I?
desolate and weak.
my heart remains and feels the sight
like an eternity of bleach down my throat
or glass in my eyes
or fingernails ripped
or neck broke
or burn marks
or bites
or the Judas Cradle
or the Blood Angel
or the Swedish Drink
or White Torture
or disembowelment
or Scaphism
except worse.
The thoughts are whirlwinds,
or maybe whirlpools
because I'm drowning
in the same way that you drown me out.
****
dani Nov 2020
You ward off my demons
My protector of the night
Gathering all my violent thoughts
Disposing of them on my behalf.
It's not fair to me
To sleep without you...
Isolation day 4 - I'm alone with my thoughts. When I'm with you, there's no such thing.
the moon shadowed my soul as I break down,
eyes glistening with crystal like teardrops,
expecting thee yet overthinking drown,
art thou still shining within your own lapse?
school is stressing me out fr.
cas Nov 2020
TMT
What do you want?
No, what do I want?
I'm almost there
Yet I'm still here,
Standing on the same page

I'm gonna keep going
This my dream,
This is my choice,
But now that I'm here
Why am trembling?

I want to be like a twinkling star
Not everyone can be a star
I'm afraid of falling
Like a falling star
I guess I'll never ever find out

Countless thoughts storms my head
Should I go or not?
I'm gonna keep going
This is my dream,
This is my choice

Did I choose the right one or not?
Honestly, I chose this, but am I wandering?
I want to be like a twinkling star
Should I go or not?
I ran as I look at the stars

I'm afraid of falling
Like a falling star
But can I be that star?
I guess I'll never ever find out
(too much thinking)
Sidharth Suraj Nov 2020
Living in my sand castle,
with narrow doors and broad windows,
short passages and empty street posts .
Night sky with empty lights,
Moonshine with hollow sighs.
Stuck in this stigma of stepping forward,
living in this chaos of seeping in this sand.
For now I am afraid to breath,
for now I feel my castle is drifting on wet land.

The castle I built seems too small and vile,
to accommodate my expanding life.
I hear the calls from the sea winds,
the wave nearing this shoreline of thoughts in me.
I can smell the fear of shattering today,
wanting to ignore these voices arrayed.
I can look far enough
from these windows of  my castle,
But I can't reach them through my narrow doorways.
Would my realities reinforce these sand walls,
when I try to force myself out of this cage of thoughts.
for the times of uncertainty, would you let go of your sand castle ?
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