I see everything differently. I used to drive down the road and think nothing of it, only noticing the trees and the people walking by. Now, each time I drive down the road I look for your face, hoping that in the crowds of people I would notice you. When I look at the trees I donβt admire their beauty, I search for your beauty in them. When I listen to music, all the songs remind me of you. Because now all of the sudden, each lyric is a note once written from me to you - perfectly describing how I feel for you. The coffee I drink reminds me of you too - I cannot run from you. For with each sip I am reminded of how you only drink black coffee, and with each swallow I take, I think of how if you were here you would criticize me for drinking it with cream. When I walk by the water I think of you. I think of how you kissed me by the water, held me, touched me, spoke to me - each wave that crashes floods my mind with memories of you. When I hear somebody yell, I hear you yelling. I hear your loud, raspy, and tired voice call out to me. I hear you say my name. I hear it all - my mind plays your voice like a record, the sound revolving in my head constantly. When I stare at this page, I cannot stop myself from thinking of you. I wonder what you would think of me if you read this. Would you laugh and call me pathetic or would you love me for it? I will never know. I often question what you are thinking about, and I often hope it is of me. I see life differently, each day when I wake I hope that the day brings me closer to you. I see the sun differently. When its beams shoot into the universe, and the heat touches my skin, I imagine that it is the heat of your skin against mine. You are the sun. As I write this I feel your emotions - I feel your hurt. I know you are no longer mine, however I feel as if I am still yours. When I think of love, I think of you - after all love isnβt easy, it is something you fight for. I will fight for you - I do not have you, but I will not lose you.
