You ever feel like driving a car
with headlights off,
in the middle of the night,
on a hazy day?

You go over that conversation
you had yesterday,
thinking that you could have been less incriminating.

You ever spend time writing out your plans
on a sheet of note paper and find it,
days later,
crumpled in your shelf?
And that tiny speck of self esteem inside you just dies.

You ever feel you have to tiptoe around your thoughts
because the 'real' you wouldn't approve of them?  

You lie awake half the night,
staring at the ceiling fan,
at the shifting shadows,
at the person next to you, lost in skepticism.

You remember that look somebody gave you
five years ago
one drizzly evening.
You remember that situation from last month,
wondering why couldn't you
have acted differently.

You ever feel like you're stuck in a loop?
An infinity loop?
Because that is just what over thinking is,
an infinite loop.
An endless assortment of 'what-ifs'.

Press 'Stop' and abort the mission.
Pull yourself together.
Give yourself that pep talk
and
go do whatever you always wanted to.
Every beam of light starts with a flicker.
Find your flicker,
it's out here.

Because one thought
is all it takes
to give you the most messed up picture of life.
And because one little thought
is all it really takes
to set things right again.

What if all our thoughts
Hiding away in our head
Not being anymore there
Were told out loud, were said

I’m fine during the daytime;
The problems come at night.
My thoughts come out to haunt me
Sometimes they make me cry in fright.

I lie awake for hours
My face is wet with tears.
Sleep seems so far away,
Though my nightmares seem so near.

I didn’t sign up for this;
Crying myself to sleep.
Who could’ve known that now it is
A burden to be able to think?

hello?
are you there?
you never answer,
when I call out your name.
maybe your mind,
is somewhere else.
i hope,
your heart isn't too.

Struggles in my mind
Rising sun now understands
Thunder in whispers.

There are days,
when she feels lost in the universe
that exists in her mind;
overthinking herself to oblivion.

There are days,
when she feels she is downing
in the depths of her thoughts.
Drowning in the sea of her emotions,
tears turning into high tides
destroying peace of mind.

Night bleeds into morning
Sun dissolves the moon

She wants to come out for a breath
and just breathe the light air.
Feel the lightness of it,
as it enters her lungs -  
the simplicity of it.

She is losing more of herself.