#numbness poems on Hello Poetry

Emerald Smith Mar 2015

Numbness

Numb
to not feel
to not feel, pain
or anything else.
being numb does not mean unable to notice
it does not mean, unable to pretend.

I know numbness.
long ago in a hospital,
it was pumped into my veins
and I learned.
Numbness,
will ease pain.
but now I am stuck
trapped in this place
where I pump myself full of metaphysical numbness

At the point I reside,
the only thing I feel
is physical.
I know the warmth of your hand when you hold mine tightly
I know the softness of her skin
and I know if I am injured.

One day,
one desperate day when I was alone against everything...
I released some of my rusted life from my arm.
and as the warmth dripped away...
I felt it.

a small spark inside
not happiness...
but a tear in my left eye.
My fears, not gone
but released,
the things I guarded so close,
brought to the light.

I remember a day
a long time ago...
in a hospital room I wondered.
which, is better?
To die filled with pain and fast,
or to be pumped full of artificial numbness, and have it last?

Numbness.
no word makes me sicker
not in disgust, but in a pit.
I am terrified of numbness,
and so I ask of anyone who will listen to my dying heart
please
DON'T let me die numb.

#numb #numbness

Danny Price Mar 2015

In the Wake of my Spiral

The comfort of my own
barren pain
retches sights to the follies
that from onset
have raised me in chains.

I gouge in what might have
come out,
in fear of free-falling
into the core of
potential Without.

Propelled into depths
death has forgotten,
my blank eyes adjust
to riches
of numbness like satin.

Exhausted and pale
I release my last wish
to gaze up at darkness
where stars burn
like *******.

#depression #up #falling #apathy #giving #numbness #resignation

Will Rogers III Mar 2015

ten letters

Downtrodden
Emotions
Prevent seeing the
Reason for
Existing;
Satisfaction and
Success are
Irrelevant amongst feelings
Of
Numbness.

[composed on March 2-4, 2014]

#depression #pain #sadness #acrostic #numbness #tension

Eleanor K Mar 2015

Rain

Sometimes the rain felt almost absent from the humid air, but for the largest of raindrops, that fell occasionally upon your eye, causing you to blink. Today, it was a mist, the drops so small as they speckled your grey t-shirt, that you hardly felt them.

#rain #day #persistence #numbness #cloudy

Will Rogers III Mar 2015

maybe I should be writing a different song…

the telegraph gave us hope
before was the silence and the panic it brought
the sky was the blankest sheet
we drew line upon it so our thoughts could meet

O Lord where are You now?
Tears come from exhaustion and the feelings so numb.
My mind is clear as blood
My attempts to understand it are utterly in vain.

Through cables black and cold
We carried our intentions to bridge and bring home
Would it all be so clear if the lines were erased
And the silence restored?*

Through days of black and white
Thoughts of my suicide float freely deep inside
Would it all be resolved if I could escape
And ride to world’s edge?

Italics are from “My Ship Isn’t Pretty”by Kings of Convenience.
[composed on February 4, 2014]

#suicide #depression #escape #blood #song #exhaustion #resolve #numbness #vain

Jami Samson Jan 2015

Spiritual Spasms

Here, it hurts here,
where I'm supposed to
face big rolling rocks
as if I've got me a helmet
and iron fists.
This part, it hurts here,
where I'm supposed to
hand-pick gentle puffs of air,
not be smothered in smokes
that choke me up to see clearly.
Way up here, it hurts here,
where instead I try to get away
inwardly, far, far away,
towards nowhere,
rather than out.

#62. Jan.27.15

#fear #freedom #pain #escape #panic #numbness

Xanthe Dec 2014

Baby, it's cold

Blinking lights, passing cars, life,
Glazed over before my eyes.
Careening they go with each breath.
I cry, I mourn,
I laugh, I smile,
Each day gets a little more grey.
I try to paint my way but my inner darkness gets in the way.
Our cold little safety blankets can whisper the sweetest things.
They promise warmth and light
But they only bring death.
Yet we snuggle and refuse to leave.
Baby it’s cold outside
How can we ever know when we are so numb?
I really can’t stay
But Baby it’s cold inside.

#life #demons #its #outside #cold #numb #baby #inner #numbness

Beth Richter Dec 2014

Surviving Soul

And sometimes, sometimes the lack of tears is what's most frightening.

An impenetrable numbness that surrounds me.
Has molded around my being.
A hard shell that even a chisel cannot chip.

I am a stone. Cold, so cold.

When did I lose my heart?
When did I lose the ability to care and trust and feel?

Oh, to feel again.
The salty wet tears on hot rosy cheeks.
The rush of crisp fresh air filling my lungs, lifting me, enticing my smooth bare feet to take courageous steps on soft beds of grassy fields.

Where did that girl go? Carefree and whimsical. The girl who welcomed emotional instability. The ups and downs and all arounds are gone.

She has gone and I am here.
I am what's left.
I am the surviving soul.

My black, wretched soul.

#trust #heart #tears #cold #shell #stone #frightening #numbness #impenetrable #chisel

Mikaila Nov 2014

Cold Comfort

I find, lately, that it is simply no longer possible for me to lose
"Everything".
Sometimes it's almost disappointing.
I'm not sure when it happened,
Or why, really,
But sometime this summer I reached a point of loss from which return is not easy.
And I began to feel a rhythm to it, like the tide.
It became soothing. Lulling.

I began to find my footing, the way you find the cold, rough sand under your toes as the ocean crashes over you and retreats,
Batters you and peels back, over and over-
Brutal, yes, and heartstoppingly sudden, but...
Predictable.

I am somewhere now beneath the waves, and it is calm and blue, and I am not afraid.
Souls do not need air.
Souls do not need to know which way the surface is.
We like the sun, but we do not need the light.
We are. We have been. We will be.
We go on.
We go on and reasons present themselves, eventually.

I choke and burn, but I do not die.
I can panic or surrender,
Struggle or acquiesce,
But either way I will go on and on,
I will
Continue.
It is a weariness that weights me here,
Not fatigue, not stress, but...
A dull knowledge of what will come,
What always comes:
I am wretchedly adaptable, pitiably enduring.
I continue.
This mind refuses to shatter.
This heart refuses to curdle.
This soul refuses to fade, and I go on- unwilling, sometimes, uninspired-
But I go on.

This place changes around me, but I am rooted to the spot,
Anchored by a stolid determination, a purposeless desire to be that I disguise as passion,
As fire, as belief,
When really I don't know why it's here, or why I am.

I only know that I have been and will be.
That resistance is futile.
That I can twist and writhe and scream and drown all I please,
And I will still wake up on the other side, continuous, old, here.

Once you discover that no risk can **** you you become obsessed with taking them- how much of me can I really demolish and wake up the next morning?
How much can I really give and go on, still?
And eventually the answer is that there is no limit, no change.
No matter the desperation, no matter the passion, no matter the sacrifice... I go on.
I go on and worlds rise and fall,
People live and die,
I love, I lose, I cry, I dream,

But I do not move.

My face remains placid. My fingers trail in the sand, white.
Chaos reigns, sometimes.
Storms rage.
Tides crash.
But at the end of everything I emerge from the murk, swaying and ancient,
With a spreading blue behind my eyes,
And the only thing I can ever be sure of is that I will go on.
It is sometimes
Cold comfort.

#life #soul #existence #numbness

Kit John Parish Nov 2014

early morning blues

muted, I broke eye contact for the sixth time that sentence
the time is 2am, and she sits beside me telling me I'm wonderful

crippled in shyness I say nothing
I want to wrap her up in my soul for the warmth she gives me
but I say nothing

and to her, I'm white with icy numbness
as if I feel nothing

#anxiety #shyness #numbness