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Dianali Nov 2024
It’s in my soul—
Like flesh pierced
By the glass-shaped pain
Sharp and raw.

Nobody knows how to help

I try to remove them,
the shattered memories
Each sharp shard
Lacerating my spirit,
Pain echoing my heart.

A ****** mess, I get more hurt.

Everything I touch,
stained—
  overflowing emotions,
Red, heavy, thick
—Intense—  

It’s a deeper wound.
Larger than itself.
It keeps cutting.
It keeps tearing.
My Faith.
I was forty- five years old, by chance, I wrote,
My very first song/poem. I am sitting in the same room,
Like then all alone, When I received a sad call, on the telephone.
A drinking buddy, Randy, stumbling on the words, he had to say,
His buddy Jamie, fell off a cliff, his last step, his life,
Ended that day. I had never planned to write, a song or poem,
I could hear Randy’s voice, he was lost, so alone.
I remember, arguing with, a voice inside, of me,
Which kept, saying you can do it, just write you will see.
I gave it a try, I was probably high, Within about,
One hour, Jamie’s Song, I had printed in pencil, before my eyes.
To this date, I have around two thousand finished, with about,
Another four hundred started, I never finished those songs,
My siblings, parents, the lady I married, and Randy,
Left this life, they have all passed along. There is no happy ending,
At least for today, I do thank God, for the talent, of writing words,
In a special way, the ideas can arrive anytime night, or day I then try to finish one then set it aside. A bittersweet feeling, I should feel proud inside,
I know there will be times in everyone’s life, we should have,
A beaming smile, which is washed away by tears from our, lost miles.
                The Original: Tom Maxwell© 8/15/22 AD
Thinking away,
Sorting thoughts, in my mind,
In and out they travel,
Always searching, for knowledge to learn and  find.
Some answers come fast,
Like our dreams, others can take, more time,
This life was not suppose, to be perfect,
Keep your eyes open, lean towards positive signs.
There are many false prophets,
Around us, trying to control, our spiritual journey today,
It’s sad, people compare material things,
Never knowing their spirit and Soul, they carry for guidance, every day,
Always, expect changes, many have special reasons,
Sometimes they change, like the seasons,
Concentrate on the future,
Forget the past days, be positive with your attitude,
As you travel, on your way,
Enjoy and learn, in this life,
It’s such a short stay.

                                 The Original: Tom Maxwell ©   03/01/2025 AD
We can not change the past, look ahead soon the future will be,
Another lost day.......create positive memories during this stay
Chloe 1d
I can’t take care of myself
Need you to be someone else
It would all be so much better
if I hadn’t learned from you

Take care of yourself
You don’t need anyone
like you used to
But now, you’re being used

I know you’re having fun
Always felt so much better
when I was drunk
If only one of us could ******* feel something

I didn’t turn out how you want
Could never be your little duck
Forced to role play as the adult for you
but could never grow up

I can’t take care of myself
Almost call you every day
I would be so much better off
if I hadn’t learned from you
If you come home,
You'll find me far from sleep,
Staring out the window counting sheep.

Breath stilled from stalking memories,
All of the joyous laughter we once held dear,
Now, to me, your ghost is near.

Yet, still,
If you choose to come home,
Do not wake me, let me rise from bed,
Realizing I no longer am alone.
I've written a lot of happy lately, lets throw in some sad, confused, dramatic, and maybe even some funny.
Most of knowing each other these days is acknowledgement
Smiling, waving, a head nod
We don’t talk as much as I’d like, but
I don’t have it in me to reach out in earnest
You’ve probably noticed the distance
Occasional texts and shared media make up
The meaningful moments we’ve shared
For a while - it’s been a bit more than a while now
But I still like you
I probably love you, I do, but y’know
We both work so much
And we don’t work together
We haven’t for years now
It’s crazy it’s years now
When you and I live
Not an hour apart
If it’s more - maybe walk faster
I don’t know - anyway

You should know what’s on my walls
I should know your new address
The way your monitor is angled
All the games that you’ve been playing
Your whole setup must be like
Y’know, the feng shui has to be just - yeah

I don’t invite you to much anything
These days you wouldn’t like it here
I do, of course, but it’s not us
And I love us y’know
You and I immersed in games or
Movies, shows, or something
Some expression of ourselves
Expressed by someone else
You point out which one’s me and
There you are engaging with me
We don’t even have to do whatever
We did on the screen
They did us for us
She walked up and asked,
Will you dance with me?

I looked all around just to see
Who it was.
There's no way,
it couldn't possibly be.

Could it? could it really be me?

And just like that,
Suddenly, 
We were dancing.

So close, surely we were floating, 
Because I couldn't feel my feet.

I couldn't hear the music, only the beat.

The pound, pound, pounding of my heart!

Her and me dancing,
Surely we were floating.

I looked down to see,
Instead I saw her,
looking up at me.

We were dancing! 

Yes, we were.

We were dancing.
Junior High School Dance,
Ladies choice, and she chose me!
First time I ever danced, I can feel it like it was yesterday.
Funny how memories work sometimes.
You're my fault,
The product of my imagination,
Everything in life I wanted,
Everyone I wanted to live in stagnation,
I'd rather live in my anger,
Then let it live in me,
And if the meds aren't in my head,
It's all the broken images of what I wanted life to be.
It's time to settle down,
To buckle up.
Focus on school and your future,
But they can never drag out the memories,
Of when we were wild and free.

Betting on everything,
Life in the dead of night.
But I guess the sun came up,
Because nothing's the same as it was,
When we were wild and free.
2021-2023
Up and down we gently go
Round and around in a spell —
While the music softly plays
On the carousel.

Up and down on a summer night
Where smiles and laughter dwell
Astride a golden horse and lion
On the carousel.

We'll wave as the world goes by
And carry a tale to tell
Singing a song of childhood
On the carousel
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