And sometimes it hits you when you least expect it. Like falling leaves but on an August day. It hits you and knocks you off balance but, you find a way back to reality. You find a way.

Sometimes it’ll hit us in our darkest hour when we needed it the least. You keep fighting. You are a fighter and he told you so. You knew you were strong before he made it known.

Some of us though, we don’t find the way. We don’t find a way to make it through. We struggle and overthink even the smallest thing. We’re sick from bareing the un cozy weather. Were sick of pushing back at the storm.

For the most of us who did make it, be strong for those who didn’t. For those who can’t. Because, the autum leave in the middle of August will hit you and you’ll realize that not everything is the way it seems.

Sanctuary



   I declare my void sanctuary. Its rhythm makes me fall, its vibrations make me crawl. As I sit on a stone, I gradually become a statue. The plastic melting in the fire, I'll soon become toxic fumes. Sometimes the fire sparks anew, a breath of mine that remains a clue. Is the aftermath a blessing or did poison strike my veins?  The venom, singing its purple sound inside my ears. I inhale enlightenment through pain, as if that's who I'm supposed to be. Please bring clarification, please bring a sign. I'm tired of being confused, this yin-yang abuse. As if the light were a monastery, then my void will be sanctuary. This clueless victim always knew his journey, his mistakes. The acknowledgment came far too late though, so refuge took hold of my chest. My chest is now void.  



                                      Jealousy's rhythm    

  

Jealousy is the song of insecurities; I sing his masculine tune. The fever can't be sweated out, the anger won't subside. I thought this was made by you, but my thoughts portray just me. Clearly my aura remains damaged or I'm just plain stupid. A gullible fool filled with fiction and paranoia. They make for a good writer, yet an alcoholic at that. Recognition became an empty shell; there's no pearl inside, just a buffoon. I am swayed by malevolence, you are benevolence. I searched for an angel, yet I became a demon. When the clouds disperse and the rain dries up, will you walk this sunny day with me? Will you stay? I see another storm coming, at least today we played.



                                              Lovesick

  

   Insects crawling up a wall, getting squished when approached. No thought about it. Just fear, just anger. A fever crawls up the body, crashing and failing the immune system. A weak body makes for a good recipe of sickness, his guts spewing out of him of course. You can't contain the virus; you can not contain the beast. His morals set him apart from man, but man lacks true judgement. Who are the real beasts? Men being swayed or a man abiding his own morals? Cast away the negative aspects of self, build on the empire of light and goodness. Just when I thought I could keep a strong will, I decayed in my own sickness. I am lovesick.

June 2013

When I think of you,
my day grows brighter.
The memory of your touch,
induces joy in my heart.
What a shame it is to not be able to find that joy again
As I live each day just wishing to die so that I can see your face again
Not the man you have become but the boy you used to be.
So for that I'm ready for whatever this life throws at me.

If you faced it, what's left to fear?

the searing sound of harmony
seeping through madness in trembling tears
ringing false scents of roses
like men ****** to breathing jaded air
and everything that's been has crowded thoughts
of plagued mindsets beset to foreign dances
I see I, and all that I've been..

I see I, dancing
through blackened flames
I see I and I've seen you..

And now that I've seen you..
what is there left to fear?

Gorgeous rhythms and soothing shadows
haunt words yet to be said through the
pale light of a thousand years

I've never been all that I could dream
Now everything I can say is as a boat
lost at sea, sailing into darkness
never to be seen
to never have been conceived
in this world that's nothing more
than a hallow sleepy dream.