Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
oddmanout Jan 2019
She broke my heart
So I cried in my car
so desperate for help
But I would not ask

I'm an Alpha Male
Yes that is me
I have tattoos
and drink Whiskey
I fight sometimes
And stand up to ***

Days went by
My wrist scabbed over
I pretended to be happy
so my friends wouldn't see

I'd go to bars
but go home before too many
I didn't want my guard down
For them to see me vulnerable

I'm an Alpha Male
Yes that is me
I have tattoos
and drink Whiskey
I fight sometimes
And stand up to ***

One night I lay awake
bathing in tears
She was the only one
I had talked to

What if she told people
I'm not the man I seemed
And she told people
of my own fragility

How I felt alone
and like I wasn't good enough
How I hated myself
and the emotions that controlled

I'm an Alpha Male
Yes that is me
I have tattoos
and drink Whiskey
I fight sometimes
And stand up to ***

Well it was boiling over
I wanted it to end
life is not worth it
I didn't want to go on

I thought of my mother
she'd never be the same
I thought about my father
losing his oldest son

I thought of my brothers
without a role model
I thought of my friends
and the loneliness they'd feel

I picked up the phone
and I called my best friend
He answered the phone

And I just broke down

I'm an Alpha Male
Yes that is me
I get overwhelmed sometimes
and can feel quite lonely
I need help my dearest friends
I'm much more fragile than what you see
Was going through a hard time, and I'm a pretty stoic guy. Hardest thing in the world was to talk about what I was feeling, I wasn't raised that way. Sometimes I still have trouble, but I'm trying to communicate my emotions more.
oddmanout Jan 2019
You see
I didn't love her
Because she made me
I loved her because she made me
And everything in between
I loved her because she made me
oddmanout Jan 2019
I love the way she sleeps
And I can tell when she dreams

I wonder what she dreams about
Does she dream of Paris and Rose?
Does she dream of movie nights in her favorite hoodie?
Does she ever dream of me?
Does she dream of other things?
Does she dream of other guys?
Does she dream of better than me?
Does she dream of freedom?
Because she feels tied down to me?
Does she dream I'm not good enough for her?
As I've long suspected to be true
Does she dream of leaving me?
Does she dream of cheap hookups and thrills?

She told me I was crazy, she didn't dream of
abandoning me
But she did.
oddmanout Nov 2018
You were right
She broke my heart
and now I'm broken
But you're wrong
I don't wish I never met her
Because those moments
looking in her hazel eyes
make this pain
oddmanout Nov 2018
When I quit smoking
I always wanted a cig
I would crave one
with every bone in my body
And then one day
I just didn't anymore

I hope I have as much luck getting over you
  Nov 2018 oddmanout
Alice Lovey
I know we've never been "together."
I know you said to move on.
I tried to be fine with wading this weather,
But the love in my heart still tells me it's wrong.

Now, I'm not saying I'm resentful,
But you did treat me like I was special.
Lately has been so uneventful.
And I'm starting to think this isn't a game...

I get a little jealous when you look at other girls.
I know we're not together, but... You are my whole world.
I get a little jealous when you talk about them too.
It's because we're not together, but...
You told me that you liked me... You told me that you do.

Now, I'm not trying to be weird, but call me, I'd give you my time.
Actually, I'd give you everything, cuz I just want you to be mine.
When I got too lonely, I'd just stare at your photos--
Soundless replacements for you, who knows.

You said I'm obsessive—come on now, don't play.
You like it when I'm open, you preferred me this way.
You said we'd be great together, don't think I forgot.
I cherish every sweet thing you said, so my heart doesn't rot.

Now I've deleted all of your things, cuz I can't bear to see your face.
My prized possessions... I should've given you space.
Why wouldn't you make me yours, like you wanted to?
Now we're apart, now we'll both just be blue.
And now I regret this—now I really do.
True, I'm a little weird, but we're both crazy.
I know what you're afraid of; I know it isn't me.
oddmanout Nov 2018
I love my bed
Nobody can hurt me here
I'll bundle in blankets
and watch movies of love
that I'll never have
and I don't have to put up walls
because they're already around me
and I might not feel good
but at least I don't feel bad
Next page