You want to move on
But you lie to my face
You say you're tired of talking about it
As if I love talking about your mistakes

You blame me for making you this way
I can admit I did my share
You see me hurt and still pile on
Because you don't really care

You know that leaving you is hard
And it only boosts your ego
You should know that every time I cry
A piece of me is letting go...

Does she know?* I ask.
I can't hide the wicked smirk on my face,
As I see the panic spark in your eyes.
Does she know about the flowers you wove through my hair?
Does she know about the words you wrote on my skin,
Everlasting, never fading, cannot be taken back?
Does she know about the breaths of life in the dead of night?
Does she know about the desperate kisses we shared when we were all alone?
Does she know about the tears you shed over the death of my love?
Does she know about the sins you committed that forced me to run?
Does she know, darling? Do you think she'd stay?

Can you live with the thought of her leaving, because I saw who you truly are?

If you knew the landing were made of swords,
Would you jump?

If you saw the bridge collapse, descending to the deep,
Would you follow?

If you had to rewatch your life at heavens gate,
Would you regret?

If you knew my touch were poison,
Would you accept it?

If you knew your actions had consequences,
Would you lie with him again?

Then why do you return to me,
And fall down on your knees
Begging for what I cannot give

If you knew I'd say the same,
Scream at you to leave,
Would you go back and treat me that way again?

promised rendezvous with your
       *** held as a carrot in front
of my wanting
       pelvis it was only later that
i realized the taste of you on my
       chin was tainted with
the stains of a
       dozen
other
       lovers who all believed that

you moaned only for them

My writing and Your kindness depend on my misery and these spectators do not care.

And I die.
And I die.
And I die.

Last night, I saw a clear blue sky
In the darkness of the moon
And my lover said
that blue are just the
color of my eyes.

So, I turned and looked at him
But he looked just the same
And my uncultured heart screamed
That I loved him


Two days later, he rings me and says
That his eyes never saw my bleeding sexuality
And was sorry
But my lover always knew
That I am not okay
And I would let the darkness in
In hope of him.

So much for the night sky
And so much for his love.

But my lover, he has no name.

Lost in a dream
Don't want to wake up
Stuck on a carousel
That will not stop
Full of emotion
Raw with passion
Standing still
Craving action
Rejecting what I have
Wanting what isn't mine
Needing what is out of reach
Longing for stolen time
I thought i knew what love was
That I had my other half
Turns out that I was wrong,
Fate placed another in my path
Past the point of no return
There is no looking back
A colorful road ahead
There is no white nor black
Surrender the heart
Submit to any fears
Escape to a secret place
No broken dreams or tears
Souls that are connected
It is obvious, no doubt
Teased with just a little taste
I can not live without
Now we bide our time
Waiting to see
Waiting, waiting, waiting...
Anticipating destiny

These eyes, no longer my own
My heart changed its beat
A snake has a hold of my stomach
My body admits defeat

It's merely following suit
After all, the body trails the mind
Rage overtook that system
When my father decided to resign

You might think a job
I guess you would be right
Twenty-five years of marriage
Forsaken overnight

Now if you are uncertain
This was not foreseen
He was fairly content a man
Although a bit extreme

He had all he wanted
That was insufficient
So he went quietly searching
And one lie became malignant

As I reimagine the events
Not by choice or reason
I can't un-hear my mother
Her sobs weak, uneven

I struggle to relinquish
The semblance I have left
Of the life I knew just days ago
Before this unthinkable theft