How am I supposed to act now?
One moment, we were like a movie
The main characters of a cheesy script
Fulfilling our roles so perfectly
The next, I find myself acting alone
Do I pretend it didn't hurt?
Do I pretend it didn't happen?
Do I pretend that the only person
Who knows all of me, who had me
Pretend they're not there anymore?
I don't want fame or Hollywood
I don't want to be some superstar
I don't want to have a new set of skills
Of changing faces and attitudes
No coach, no instructions, no guidance
I keep rewatching the moments we made
Rereading our last drafts of conversations
I am no actor or director or screenwriter
I have no plans for a scene or direction
I am just a man
Pretending to not love you afterwards

Beauty that
is on
the outside,
can hide
something
that we
cannot seek,
involving pains,
hurts and trauma,
Inside of Beauty,
that can
cut so deep,
A Beautiful
face hides
the secret
of a poor, poor
broken soul,
a smile and
a pretty face,
within this
can feel
so, so low,
of flowing tears,
soft cries, and
So, so much
sorrow,
even through
the agony
within a beauty
hides suffering,
that no one
can
detect or know


B.R.
Date: 8/1/2025

Always with me, stuck in my life
Lays an aimless reminder in disguise,
My secrets,trauma, and all that hurt,
Hidden behind a camera I hold.

It takes me down, slow and slow,
Knowing I can't let people know,
Why is there a camera around my neck
Since I can't prepare them for what to expect.

When your Heart is broken, and
The Words within are unspoken,
When you are Hurting inside,
Is when your emotions have awokened,

When you don't know what to say,
As your skies have turned to gray,
When you are used to bright sunshine,
To brighten up your Sunny day,

When a time you were so Happy,
With a big smile on your face,
Now, you're feeling so down and out,
For, your smile has been erased,

When you would stop and smell the roses,
and Dance around with grace,
Now, you feel so cold and lonely,
Oh, the feeling of disgrace,

When heartbroken you try to cope,
with the feelings build up inside,
Even through this time, there is Hope,
Strength and Courage will be your Guide!!


B.R.
Date: 4/28/2025

WHY JUST WHY???
Is what I ask,
Things are hectic,
I can't even leave
it in the past,
I want to let it go, but
LIFE BRINGS TO US STRUGGLES,
It HARD to ENDURE IT,
It BRINGS so MUCH TROUBLE,
I just don't UNDERSTAND IT,
WHY, I ASK WHY????
As I FIGHT BACK TEARS,
LOOKING UP INTO THE
BLUE HEAVENLY SKIES,
This is
EMOTIONALLY DRAINING,
I'm trying to get an
UNDERSTANDING,
This is just so
DEMANDING,
I am not even
COMPREHENDING, and
I am even not here
PRETENDING,
as these TREACHEROUS,
HARD
days goes by,
whipsersng in my
head softly,
◇
◇
◇
◇
why just why????


B.R.
Date: 4/19/2025