i would like to evict you from me
stop tripping over you like over a treshold

i'm all over the place
but you're nowhere to be found

but still
you're everywhere

i don't know how to miss you anymore
even though i still feel your absence

I still remember

all the conversations we had,
the promises you made
when you told me you loved me
the way you played with my hair
the way you'd smile at something I said
how you held my hand
your laugh
the way you texted
your snore
when you told me you had feelings for me
your voice

But you don't long for me the way I long for you. Anymore.

we fell in love and
      it was like diving into
            the cold, salt water

                                   then one day you just
                               left, waves tossed violently
                                       and we were over

                                                      one day my heart broke
                                                           ­     like glass bottles on rigid
                                                           ­                 rocks beneath water

You don't know if u love someone until it's too late
You give them your heart trusting them
They'll keep it safe and care for it until you two are over

They still have your heart
When they call you names like ***** or ******* the heart weakens
You still love them so the heart still beats

Once they say "I hate you"
The heart stops
All the love for them is drained from your heart

They give your heart back broken
And leave it to you to pick up the pieces
Taking the love you had for them and tossing it away

I never wanted to be cliche
And wish to take my life
Over a certain individual
No matter how special they are

To me, she was everything
She meant more than air to me
Because before I met her
Life meant very little

Yes the medication helped me
To feel more empty than sad
Most days
But she was the only sunshine
In the rain storm of my life

These tears that stain my face
Burn into my skin like acid
Trailing, disintegrating
Everything from my eyes
To the deepest pits of my heart
The place only she knew

Where only she could survive
No one else deserved to see me
Not in the ways she did
The only one who could truly see
My broken soul and
my mutated heart
But still love me through it all

Now she's gone
No longer mine to hold
Or to call
Just to hear her sweet voice
Before I daze into a restful sleep
Sparkled with visions of her
Beautiful face
Those gorgeous blue eyes
That could see me
The real me
Even when I couldn't
understand it myself

I love her
And she left me

She is my life
Was my life
The only one who meant anything
To my ****** up heart.
And now I feel nothing.

Empty
Ice cream
Containers

collateral damage
Broken ,
i look at the shards of mirror
A lifetime shattered into instances
laden in heartbreak of broken memories
bloodstained fingerprints
walk in vain across the surface
In futility
desperate attempts to mend a broken heart,
But stabbed again, by the edges of infidelity
Slicing ridges , reminders  , of those painful memories
Corralling the few wonderful ones
each splinter of glass,
holds yet another series of events , in the story of a lifetime
Unable to mend
Just like this broken heart
collateral damage , to another broken past " on the mend "
For that's all a broken heart is ,
is little pieces of " reflections " that still " cut you " whenever your soul reaches out to touch ....

I believe, God put his view on the world in new borns eyes, and when you stare down into the kaleidoscope wonders, you see the natural beauty of what this all use to be. And when I look down at you Cooper, know I'm standing in the Garden of Eden, with tears rolling down my cheeks, splashing against a phone screen, preventing me from watching you blink. Aunty loves  you Cooper.

all she wanted was certainty
but she loved the man of obscurity.
though she finds it hard to forget,
loving him is not her regret.