Don't break her heart.

I know she and I don't talk anymore
and that she was fine with breaking me
to be with you.

But don't break her for me.
I could never forgive myself.

I see what you did.

You ignored me for a month
and then just happened to come back
the day before you asked her out
to make sure I still wasn't interested.

I'm not stupid.
I saw right through you,
and I don't appreciate being used.

That may have been well played,
but it wasn't played well enough.

I don't hate you.
After all that we went through,
I never hated you.
—I thought I could never hate you.

But then again,
I thought I knew you.

I thought you were that sweet, selfless guy,
the guy that cared about me more than anything,
who said he'd never hurt me.
Who told me he loved me.

But if you really cared about me more than anything,
and loved me as much as you claimed you did,
then you wouldn't have hurt me like you did now.

I wouldn't be sitting here
with tears streaming down my face,
writing these poems to get out the feelings
I otherwise bury inside.

I could never hate the boy I thought you were.
But you're not that boy at all,
at least, not anymore.

I broke your heart.

You came crawling back to me,
saying it was all your fault
(even though you thought it was mine),
just so you could speak to me again.

So, I let you back in my life.
But then you said you couldn't handle it,
couldn't handle thinking about
what had happened between us,
about how badly it hurt you,
because you still loved me
and knew I didn't love you back.

So you said goodbye,
that you might be back
sometime.

You had given me a second chance
when I broke your heart.
But I don't think
I'll ever be able to give you one
after you broke mine.

So when you did come back,
I had to say goodbye.

It's dark inside

I don't know what happened
to me

I did it only once
and said it was the last

But I don't remember
what I did next

It's like something or one
has control over my head

The things they are doing
,aren't  even me me choosing

I think I know what's going
on ,that drug has taken all
my power

It's hard to remember but I
can't fight them

Without getting deeper
in the darkness

Help me!!

I used to think that
there were these little bones in my heart, and
when they got broken, the doctors would put
a bright pink cast on my heart.

But it doesn't work like that.

You can't put a cast on your heart, and even if you could,
there isn't a cast big enough to hold every single piece
my heart has broken into.
There isn't a glue strong enough to put it back
together, and keep you from breaking
it, yet again.

I had an elderly lady look on me and say "one day you're going to be a little heart-breaker to a bunch of boys."
And I'm sure I was before now.

So next time you adorn yourself with such a label as,
"Heart-breaker," perhaps you should imagine
what it would be like when someone breaks your heart.

The most exquisite truth of all is this:
I may be broken.
I am not
d e s t r o y e d.

To the once blooming violet, is it true?
Will she succumb her petals to the burden of time?
Will I be witness to the ripples of this crime?
Is the storm to drown her in skies darkened blue?

Why is the savior the one to endanger?
Why is the heartsease the one heartbreaker?
Why is the kind spirit the true soul shaker?
Why is my best friend to become a stranger?

How can she lose against the clutches of temptation?
When was the divine cursed with humanity?
How could the listener speak with inanity?
When was our friendship twisted into damnation?

Will an invasive **** be victorious in his heist?
Is the **** to convince her of his illusive might?
Is he ******* her salve, to my abysmal fright?
Will I rot of envy from the disgraceful tryst?

Why is life’s story a destiny written in stone?
Why can’t I change the demise plagued within?
Why should her scent become my eternal toxin?
Why shall it degrade me from my flesh ‘til my bone?

How was I yearning for the bliss of her design?
When was I seeded with this addiction?
How was it dreamt into endless affliction?
When did Violet and Lost Girl begin to intertwine?

Epilogue:
And did the lost girl tiptoed through the darkened fields?
Was her in search of the warmth of the sun’s yield?
Did she reach the water? Was it her escape?
Was a giant lily in the wait?
Was it a doomed attempt? No heat, no win?
Were her burdens too heavy? Did she sink in?
And forever bound, was this betrayal to restrain her way?
Or was it a promise of the past to save her day?