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My love for you is parasocial
But I swear we knew each other once before
Its always a little(very) one sided in the end, isn't it?
The feeling of safety, a net that you've woven, a thoughtful connection with a person you've chosen.
And though you were fine, and you gave up on yearning, his charm was unmatched, your affections he was earning.
Never were you bitter about being alone,
Look at you now, hand glued to your phone.
He was a kind man, a soft man, not mean,
And that's why it hurts worse that it's not meant to be.
The worst part about meeting someone after you've established being content being alone, is getting reacquainted with the loneliness when they're gone.
dead poet Jan 16
i cried a river;
it wasn’t enough -
to whet my wits,
and call your bluff

i tried a thing,
or two, in vain;
i could not escape
the house of pain.

i lied to you -
didn’t occur to me,
‘t’d be so hard
to agree to disagree.

i hide away
my bother; i coy -
hush the man, and
play the boy.

i ride along -
for i’ve lost my way;
bide my tongue…
do as you say;

i denied myself
the right to speak:
i waived my voice
to the cackle of
the creek.
Kalliope Jan 16
I want something sweet on the tip of my tongue,
a strawberry, some coolwhip, and coconut ***
I need it to send dopamine to my brain,
I want to stop laying here, going insane
Ice cream and syrup and sprinkles could do,
But after it all,
I'm still craving you.
Salted caramel cheesecake,
This separation's hard to take,
Peanutbutter French toast,
You are what I crave the most.
Syafie R Jan 15
A whispered "love," a trembling plea,
Yet silence spreads like a raven’s decree.
The night devours, the stars recede,
Unspoken truths, a soul that bleeds.

Your lips unmoved, your gaze a tomb,
A frigid void, a lover’s doom.
I claw at shadows, a specter’s trace,
But find no warmth in your hollow embrace.

What lies ferment beneath your guise?
What poison rests in your deadened eyes?
I taste the ache, a bitter hymn,
The only sound—a distant "hmm."
Kalliope Jan 14
I've never left a person behind
I cling, I grasp, I claw,
Keeping them somewhere in my orbit.
For awhile you were the sun,
My reason to wake up,
Your warmth making me feel alive, at least for awhile.
But the sun is a star, and a star doesn't shine forever.
For a time you were my Earth,
My home, my safety, my comfort
My place to learn and grow and laugh and cry.
I thought I could keep you at this station forever.
But like a bad astronomer I can't decide which planet is where or which direction it flows, and you're lost in my mess doomed to be Pluto.
But Pluto is still a planet to me,
Ever so quietly orbiting my chaos,
Dodging every meteor I send your way,
But not letting me let go, refusing to be lost.
Closure
Peace
Reconnecting
And falling apart

It's all part of the art
The chess game
The mess
Apart of stress

I digress
I see now
I believe now
No going back this time
I can not be your best friend
It's truly the end

Three years I died
Three years I cried
I kept lying to myself
I'm fine
I'm not dying
I'm done crying
I hate you
I hate us
It was never enough

You were a true love
We looked at the stars above
We were shining stars
Glowing and radiant
We burned out
Exploding and permanent

I see now
I think I really do
You're apology
It was true
But you are still
You

I can move on now
I miss us
I really do
But moving on
Doesn't mean it'll stop
It just means understanding
Why it had to stop
It still hurts
But not as much

Thank you for your apology
Thank you for seeing me
For missing me
Thank you for the time spent
The magic lent
Everyday with you
Was beautiful
Sparkling and flying
It ended with crying
But we're no longer dying

I see it now
I really do
You are you
It's something I can't undo
You are selfish
You are an addict
You make bad choices
But mean no bad behind it

It's who you are
And this is who I am
When I was around you
It's all you would do
You hurt me
But you never meant to
It's who you are

You didn't say this
You probably don't know it
But it's who you are
You are selfish
You are reckless
And I don't think it'll ever change

We can't be friends
But it hurts less
It hurts less
It really does
I hugged you one last time
Or maybe not
But for now
It's what we've got

A better goodbye
Then three years ago
It didn't end in tears
Or fears
Just friendly talk about the years
You said let's hang out
Then never called again
It's how you are
I know how you think
Dear old friend

So you do you.
And I'll do me
I'll never hate you
And you'll always miss me
Our souls still connected in destiny
But apart for all we can see
It's okay
I know it is now
So you go ahead and leave town
And I'll keep you around
In my heart
Right where you
Belong
Actually a week after I wrote this i saw them again and we laughed and cried and reminisced. I'm not sure what to do with this but it's nice to heal
Millie Jan 6
i'm so lost
first you love me
then treat me like trash
acting like i'm not there
...acting like you don't care

i don't understand what ive done to you
to make you hate me the way you do
is it really hate?
or only a facade?

i don't know how to feel
cause i don't know what's real
do you truly love me?
or am i only a means to an end?
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