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a pernicious old troll
with restless fingers
    and maybe also a mouse
still haunts the White House

for his last days in office
he spooks out of all bounds
sends millions into poverty
destroys protected grounds
obstructs where he can

desperate not to lose fans
    from his base that still dream
    that he won an election
he tries to make it seem
     like he still is in power

but many have gone sour
there is talk of defection
and crumbling are formerly
supportive actions

yet he still claims he’s won
fires those who don’t agree
is unable to see
that his time is gone
angel Nov 2020
cheap liquor, good drugs.
burns through her cash.

blue eyes turn grey,
deep seas now ash.

stranded on shore;
nowhere to swim.

beautifully drained:
soft, rotting skin.

laying on the sand,
of an hourglass.

watching, waiting,
for day to pass.

her insides crumble.
her unbearable pain.

her lack of reason,
to ever change.

and if she had the chance,
she'd do it all again.
You bit into my flesh so hard that you drew blood

The pain was sadistically satisfying

The wound was so impressive it was ugly

I knew that you were hurting me but harm was all I knew

So I turned to you and said,

"What more can you do?"
sometimes love can be self destructive
A Nov 2020
I gave up on being me with you

You said that what was me was naive, wrong, weak and difficult
You ripped it out, threw it on the floor and said ' Look at this mess! Look at what you've done!'
And I raged, refused to clean, tried talking sense, screamed 'well look at you!',
cried 'just look'
Until I turned myself inside out to see what you meant
until I started seeing it too
Until I also wanted to rip those parts out of me, rip out what was me, what used to be me

Until I stopped being me with you
And became a hollow shell of you
Carlo C Gomez Oct 2019
Here comes Mr. Chemtrail--
Pretty jets
Stream across the sky
By day, at night
They're tucked into cushy
Launching pads;
To sleep like us
Underneath the stars,
Drooling like a baby;
The rains of which wash away
Our Happy Tomorrow sign,
Written in sand
Across a hiraeth seashore;
With bountiful aura,
Everything is smelling like roses
Kept in the fuselage,
Waiting for a turn
To shine, perhaps ignite,
In all the glamour of
A shooting star:
Great godless geyser;
A prism of colors
Rain-bowing
Electively over funeral flowers,
This death was always meant
To be a friend with benefits,
Allowing us one last
Glorious ride into the heavens,
Before overtaken
By the undertaker;
The sky's the limit,
Steely-eyed missile man;
We're terminal now
And on final approach,
Bleed for us once more...
L'appel du vide is French and describes an intrusive thought or urge pertaining to self-destructive behaviour, that may occur during everyday activities.
Cas Jun 2020
Last night I smashed my phone

I don't know why I did it

And yet I hate myself for doing it

For the reason I did it

Because I know it was bad

My behaviour was unacceptable








Each time I see the smashed screen it makes me feel sick
When Can I Stop Feeling Like I Ruined Everything?
Yvonne Han Jun 2020
I've never been very honest with myself.
But I suppose you could tell
from how hard I try to come off as enigmatic,
when in reality the only mystery to me is
how I haven't blown up into a million pieces yet.
Valmir Zimberi May 2020
Leaves getting hit by the wind
A violent gale in the unknown dark
Drinking my cup of tears
And eating all of my sins

Suddenly it starts raining
Dropping down on the leaves like heavy anchors
From my window I see sadness
I can smell the rain
Together with the gloom taking over my home

Every person has the right to be sad
But I think I abused my privilege

Prove me wrong.
there is a man.
he steps into a bar.
it looks as if to
be older than he himself.

eyes flutter to his stained clothes.
he’s composed of
coarse skin,
***** nails,
whiskey for blood,
a head full of Bukowski,
sixty two dollars,
and some change.

only the elements.

he drinks, and drinks, and drinks.
he burps, he yells,
he ****** on the curb,
he curses.
a swig and kick then swing.
and now the
asphalt feels colder than steel.

warmer was the creaking barstool,
heating his soul,
gulp after gulp.

bitter bottom shelf brown.

but he’s determined.
determined to finish it.
and he returns.

nobody in the bar.
he looks out a window.
the streets are empty.
he grabs bottles that are not,
making friends with them.

alone with the barstool.
the tender, emerging from underneath the bar,
fixes another drink.
the man thought he was alone.
the glasses clink.

they drink, and drink, and drink.
alone, but together.

in a drunken haze he sees the drywall melt.
he hears the rumble, the pieces of oak wood
being ripped from their foundations.

the shattered glasses surrounding
the man, forming a barrier between
the outside world and himself he could not understand.

“it’s falling apart, isn't it.”
says the man, accepting.

“why yes, yes it is.”
says the tender, fixing one last drink.

“here’s to misery.”
says the tender, raising his glass up to the man.

“...and here’s to it’s company.”
says the man.

the glasses clink,
he looks out the window again.
he thinks of where he could be right now,
outside he sees marie, the kids,
the front lawn where he’d
drink beer and pretend to like
his neighbors.  

he hears no gulp or groan
from the tender.
the man looks back and sees an empty bar
with nobody there.

he feels the bar collapsing
in on itself, destroying everything within it.
a shame, truly.

no one to bask in this with.

“well.”
he says, raising his glass of bitter brown in the air.

“...to just misery then.”

cheers.


-melancholicreator
please comment & repost if you enjoyed.
Holly Apr 2020
The clothes I wear don’t feel like home even on good days
and most days they end up at the bottom of my bed
in a pile I avoid putting away,
There is a museum of damage inside my chest and half the time
I don’t know what parts of me are on display anymore,
My lonely looks a lot like boredom
when I find myself standing in the bathroom
at 5:00 in the morning staring at my hands,
I have a bad habit of letting my emotions choke me
so that the only words spilling from my mouth
are black and blue lipped lies,
My body is a hostel ghosts like to rent when there is
free space in the attic,
The tendency to self destruct means I am willing to lie down
on your rocks like Prometheus and have you pick at me like a vulture,
I would burn your house down until I am
the only house you have left to run home to,
My breath is the condensation in the shower you forgot to get rid of
that will turn to mould if left to settle,
I can hear the pity in his voice when he calls me pretty,
there is a grave waiting for me when you are finished filling a void,
I am too lazy to figure out how to heal myself,
I have never been enough for those who did not stay.
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