In the town up north
They hide the sons and daughters
Who seek refuge under the light of the setting sun
The children who hide
From sons of daughters pregnant with absinthe
Heavy with intoxication
And daughters of sons looming with angry fists
Guns fiery with magazines of threats

When they see no one’s home
Sons of daughters head west
They proclaim "we’re not needed here"
Daughters of sons head east
They cry "we’re not acknowledged here"
So when the children return
The house has moved down southward

When they leave for their own
Easts and wests on their foggy compasses
History trips them on the feet of new strangers
In a murky, yellowed sea of foul leftovers
They make unions on flimsy wooden boats
But when they return home as the sun disappears
Their children have been taken along with the light

Little one,
My beating heart,
When I look at you,
I am in awe.

Your light and your smile,
Brightens the darkest days,
Everything is worthwhile,
For once, for ever.

Oh! tiny flower,
You are joy,
You are love,
You are happiness.

Losing my mom before my 30's taught me a lot about life. It's short. Short in the "she was in remission for eight years, there's no way it could come back" short. Because it did. Come back.

It showed me what it feels like when the air is physically ****** out of the room - the feeling of a soul leaving the body. And that even the most private of people may still want their family surrounding them during their last breaths. It taught me how to administer the correct amount of morphine, consol a father who is inconsolable and pick the "perfect" urn. I learned there is a part of myself I will never get back because I was a part of her and she a part of me.

I will never just 'get over this.'
Somedays I feel like no one remembers or cares and for that Mom, I am sorry.
I know you're never coming back but I still somehow hold onto a small sliver of hope that you will.
And when I realize you're not,
The wave hits me again.
And again
Onto my *** and each time
It becomes harder and harder to stand back up.

There is nothing
on this planet more beautiful
than seeing a daughter's smile
in her mother's eyes
even when heartache is an
ingredient for something so heavenly.
The sun and moon could learn so much
from this baby girl’s warmth and glow.

Got so much stuff
                       penetrating my brain
Activists, blacktivists
                       my little girls pain
                       that I have caused
                       her pause to success
Stop the blame game
Prepared instead for the
                       sweet accolades
                       of your future around you
Life is short
Make it easy as you can, love

I can sit here all day and night
                       to tell you why
                       to stop dwelling
                       and start loving
But then I get so mad
                       when you can see me
The opposite of what you should be

Freedom is not a word
It's a choice
You've got it
Use it

i'm awful and rotting,
i'm good for nothing.
i'm so far from being even a decent daughter.
in fact, i should be charged with a soul slaughter.
she's my own mom,
she has always made me so calm.
yet here i am breaking her,
making what little confidence she has left deter.
i don't know how to apologize,
when what i said to her was far from lies.
yet i took it too far,
i made her feel like she isn't up to par.
it was one hair color, but i know,
that she took it to heart, like an arrow from a bow.
what i wish she knew is that despite this mistake, i love her,
this is the only statement that i can say for sure.

Her eyes were like the shining stars
Gave him joy and pain  
Her eyes reminded him of the one once was here
He felt Happiness and sadness every time he looked at them
Because Her eyes were liker her mother’s

I’m no daughter
I’m no mother
born under a cabbage
only worms
as my fellow cradle
I crawled
on barren land
my ***** and scratched  skin
covered with calluses

I’m no daughter
I’m no mother
born under a cabbage
I fell
the icy water took me
but I was colder than it
the current  carried me away
I climb on the bank
I was clean

I am mother
I became  daughter
I palpated
happiness

I can write you a song
                   or a lullaby
Fill your heart with fury
Or fill your eyes
with tears
                   little one
Whatever comes outta
                   my fateful
                             mouth
I can slow down
and write what I mean

I love you
I'm proud of you

And in those awkward
silences
At times I blurt
                   something stupid
like a stock ****
Pump start the conversation
                   ease up the awkward silence
Watch the fight begin
                   in observation
**** my spoken word
and love what I do mean
Child of mine
What I mean
                   is I love you
                                      so so much
                                                            ­ (I know)