Mum says on the count of three
Don't be scared, ok, now we'll try it again on five
Go ahead and take your first dive
Then you will know you are truly alive
Take it slowly and learn to jive
Go hopping from tree to tree
Walk the power and clothes line, you'll be fine
You don't even have to pay for electricity, it's free
Drop down to the grassy knoll, if you need to dine
I hear the wiggly worms are great, this time of year
You'll be alright my smooth gliding young dear
Opps! Sorry son, I forgot to tell ya 'bout the neighbourhood cat
****, RIP my last son, I always forget to mention that
That's the last baby birdy for me, I'm all done.

I have a universe
in my pocket... and some
lint. The world
at my fingertips,
all knowledge awaits
and forty two cents
in change rattles next to it.
I have a universe
in my pocket and what...? I
use it to watch cat videos
and trade petty barbs
with fellow trolls under a bridge.

spine tingles
and cracks
a Goddess
somewhere
finds me in
a crystal ball

i howl at the
empty sky
hoarse scream
into a single
star

some meaning
must come of
all this

or i'll just be
a yowling
ragged
cat
in the yard.

I have forgotten
how many cats she has but
****, are they lucky

6:24 PM
30/8/19

Smoothly, she slinks onto the window sill,
silky body settling before tall pane of glass;
Outside, the city’s down and out
Outside, the city’s golden light
and darkest dark.
She curls,
long tail around slick body
and stares out
for the one who stares back.

Tonight,
It’s an empty window opposite,
A single frame of
oh, what her life could be.
She’s never seen more
doesn’t yearn to,
Just for her amore
her golden tabby love.

Ah, there he is,
a pounce atop window sill;
he stares at her
who stares back
his joli chat noir (pretty black cat).

But it’s all too soon
when she’s wrapped in arms too smooth
and a voice,
lacking feline’s purr
slurs,
“Ah, puppy love, Rosette.
It’s all  just puppy love.”

1.  i'm allergic to cats, and that doesn't mean anything to most people but i hope you understand why i included it.
2. i open fortune cookies with you in mind.
3. you are my worst kept secret. my therapist knows everything about you.
4. every inch of me, all that i am, secretes and exudes "accident." but you. you were so intentional to me.
5. you are a sunrise if i've ever seen one
6. i want to make you jealous. i want you to see my heart and wish it yours.
7. you make up every song i love, every poem i write, every picture i take and every reason i sleep at night.
8. i love the pauses you take between your words. i love that you know the weight of the poison that is human interaction.
9. i'm so sorry you ever had to learn the weight of the poison that is human interaction.
10. the mere idea of letting you see into my soul is petrifying and if you ever read this poem, please understand the strength and stupid it took me to let you.
11. i wish so badly to just lay shoulder by shoulder with you and wonder why the universe let me know you.
12. i hope you never understand the feeling of missing someone who just doesn't miss you.
13. i miss you.
14. it has been thirty days and i am doing better all the time.
15. but i still miss you.
16. but i have me, and for that, i am glad.

i never seem
to get enough
rest
these days
always waking
up
tired

to start coffee,
****,
fix my hair,
sit in bed drinking
the coffee
plumbing the depths
for
ways to get through
another day,
****,

try to remember ways
that worked
before

maybe a quote
or a character
a poem
a song
a memory
an illusion
could even be
another person

but time draws
ever nearer
ever closer
until
at last
that silent cheetah
is sprinting

before i know it
i'm sitting
in my car
turning the key
with whatever
semblance and steel
i finally gathered

-a real live
cubist representation
of my
self
driving to work
at 3:49 a.m.

passing  
three black cats
in
the street
that watch me
carefully,
the glowing night
white-hot
in their eyes


satellites of some
indifferent future

hidden with
the devils
on the horizon