Drops of rain engulf the space around me. Burdening my jacket with their fleeting composition. I stare to the clouds with eyes so empty.
Eyes so hollow from this eternal case of melancholia.

My hearts sinks to the catacombs, and there is shall remain.
Stuck in yesterday, yet dreaming of tomorrow. I feel the growing pains as it wishes to escape. To be free of the malady of being alone. To find the one who can nurture it for eternity.

The sun pierces the clouds, reminding me to breathe. Reminding me to smile. To love. I can't deny this beckoning. This call to arms. For even in the dark you must follow your heart. Through atrophy, through apathy, I choose to carry on. Though the path is lost, and full of challenges, I will not give in to the anguish that lies within.

bloodied fingers madly claw
caskets hermetically sealed
   bullet riddled bodies crazily didst draw
triggered bloodshed tsunami,

   where logic insists there must be a flaw
precious priceless proud loved ones demise
   festers "stunned disbelief" to gnaw
perhaps shell shocked next of kin

   utter primal wails resemble distorted hee haw
lifeless loved ones alive just moments ago,
   these special darlings (dozen plus youth)
   premature death deprived

   never delight one or more in-law
whereat deceased brides and grooms
   denied pledging troth
   from permanently stilled jaw,

while bereaved
   inconsolably cry deafeningly, drenching
   cloths cupping raw cheeks,
   a cruel prank sans burden ****** upon a maw
(whose womb once housed
   forever lifeless son or daughter),
rigor mortis out buzzfeeds Stihl chain saw

shrieking, how,
   this "NON FAKE" living nightmare
cast an excruciating pall,
   whence diabolic demons lear
into the opened seam,

   where under a sheltering sky Gaia doth hear
the deafening lament against
   a cool, calm and collected
   frenzied maniac whose flare
ring nostrils adrip with rage

   exchanged slugs of lead for dear
lee departed souls,
   where dark clouds may never clear
as the living suffer horrendous psychic hemorrhage
   agonizingly bid their own
   flesh and blood affixed atop a bier.

This poem marks my wishes that
I want in this New Year.
2017 is now a closed chapter,
and I hope to leave all the misfortune behind.
So I pray

That this year, I will be blessed with happiness
and stability for everyone; my three families.
My friends, my blood, and HelloPoetry...

This year, I will be able to hone my craft
and have to confidence to go
after my dreams.

And finally,
I pray that my mother remains in good health.
Let me not worry about her all the time.

2017 has been a year of heavy burdens.
Where I felt like I couldn't handle anything.
I know there is no end to our burdens, so
I ask for you to broaden my shoulders
So I can bear the burdens
and grasp my blessings.