the mold on the bones
of a wolf ****
600 years ago

wolf puppy eats bones
pauses for a moment
sharp teeth

stumbling bowlegged through the last subway car,
loose-fit black rags bandaging frail limbs,
face twisted in a permanent scowl,
matted grey hair jutting from a flaky scalp,
she jangles her paper cup of coins
each flail of the arm a sharp crescendo;
I flinch.

She extends her hand with a gaze that says: pity me;
I cannot look. I don’t want anything to stir in me,
my own pain is already too heavy,

but --

here they are: spoiled thoughts wafting over me like the waves
of her robust stench: warmth
between my thighs,
tattoos
bounding up thick muscular arms that aim at me in such earnest that my disillusionment melts away, and I am paralyzed
by the lure of pheromones and the smell of skin
which doesn’t quite leave you after you leave him.

And then truth clangs hard in my chest:

but her bones are made of steel!
So who am I to look away?
Maybe if something were to crash into me,
I’d pulverize
into
dust.

Most days, I feel alone
Most days, I can feel it in my bones
The way the dark wind blows
It’s like I’m the only one against the flow

I wake up each day in a twilight zone
I look to my left and my right, I’m on my own
But when I look up to the sky, there you’re aglow
Be with me, in this land down below

shatter me
break my heart
& my bones
kiss me passionately

my spine coughs
pain,
****** smoke
& anger drives
my vertebrae
to get close
to the heart
& cleave it
caves
with bony blood
wave

Mixin' up these potions, entering the snake bite into my veins.
Playing you like a puppet as I unleash the venom.
Tell me how it tastes...
Lick it, **** it.
Voodoo dolls playing games at your feet and controlling you like you have nothing to hold onto.
I'll have you, and own you.
I'll be your worst nightmare.
Feel my pain, tormenting you.
Infect you, I'll kiss you, I'll **** you.
Consume me, consume me, consume me.
Bite my venom into you neck as you howl in pain.
Like a frost bite, ice cold as the teeth sinks in.
Worship me, your dark goddess.
Voodoo.
Pinching needles through your chest and laughing at your cries.
Aching, the pain throbs.
The pain you made me feel, back onto you.
She cheated you, the next one died.
Who's doing was that?
Karma?
Step on the glass, staple your tongue.
Cries become mere whispers malevolent to your despair.
Eating cotton candy as your heart begins to tear.
Apart.
I wanna, end you.
Why arn't you scared of me?

A beautiful dazzle of sunlight wakes me up,
Slowly opening my eyes feeling numb.
Slowly remembering the taste of my own cup.
Karma, that ****** ****.

Splattering blood in the parking lot.
Severely beaten,
All of the memories and regrets are brought;
Left me bleeding.

A silly smile on my face.
Waiting for that fatal coup de grace.
A bludgeoned arm, a fractured leg, a broken nose...
Peacefuly falling in the arms of Azrael, to forever repose.