The cold textured feelings, ripping up my arm,
the saddened look, I give out - screaming help.
The black and white layer is for a reason,
the mask of the witch doctor, laid on her face,
I don’t want to involve myself in beauty so painful,
it’s seems so sadistic of me, yet an artistic advantage.
When you scream out and call me wrong,
I've learnt to love the agony that pain brought.
The reason for the pain is because when it began,
it began on false alarms - they mistook me.
I was once a young girl, so free and angelic,
then it all began when I realized everything,
I was a bully to the young, a monster inside my soul,
I hid away from everybody, except isolation itself.
A girl known as angels came to worry for me,
I cried out because I am the blood thirsty demon.
She did not know that the dress that she wears for enchantment,
is a witch-crafted nightmare of a long lost devil.
I remember when I loved him so dearly,
I wanted to be with him forever.
Little did I know, how foolish I were to even believe,
in fairy tales at all, the witches and the queens.
“Never grow up”, was the advice I was given,and honestly,
it was terrible advice sunk into me.
I love the pain smothered in the darkness,
welcome to my game, the world of dim.
A girl known as angels came to worry for me,
I cried out because I am the demon,
There by the bushes, picking all the leaves,
I felt their patterns exchanging my thoughts.
I really don’t get it. If I were a demon,why did I feel like an angel once?
Why did they paint my wings white?

My wings, they tell me,
Open up, protect,
save them,

as gunfire riddles them, they scream,
save them, save them,
and i listen,
because they are me,

as feathers fall, on a setting sun,
they scream, they scream,
She screams, she screams,
No!, a single shout,
too late, too late,


i am screaming, as i die,
save them, save them,
save them from themselves,

i hit the ground,
the screams stop,
i have saved them, I have saved them,

A dark and murky irky
Girl
Skipped down a winding stair

She coiled a bright red ribbon
Through her plaited
Hair

The girl is an angel
She alights at loneliness
She brushes your hand

And whispers
That life is just unfair.

Now I lay me down to sleep
I want for nothing more than to bury thoughts deep
Escape the wretches the day has brought
The wars, the sadness, the world has wrought
If I pass away in peaceful sleep,
I pray the Lord my soul to keep.
If I should die before I wake
No more days should I have to ache
For this world has kept me far too long
It is time to hear my mellow swan song
If my soul is pure enough before morning wake
I pray the Lord my soul to take.
The four corners to my bed,
Surround me with the utmost dread
I know there is nothing left for me
My soul is nothing more than a sad story
I'm sorry for whatever path my carriers must tread, to the
Four angels round my head;
Who should know that, in life, from my troubles I fled
A noble life is not one that I chose
But I'm ready for an ending, for angels, I suppose
One to watch and one to pray
So they will carry out my day
I will never see the morning light
I planned for dying on this night,
These angels will keep my suffering at bay, thankfully, there is
Two to bear my heavy soul away.

Empty angels dance
upon the thunderhead,
skip amongst the ******,
laugh amongst the dead,
twirl along the river Styx
to abandon those they've led.

They speak with such hostility towards my goals
But they're just simply non believers
I stand on top of my sentences with promise and I don't play games
Despite me having a hard time speaking
I come off as slow but I'm simply moving too fast
For someone who is in complete denial of what I have to say
I take pity on those I have hurt
Because I wish I was able to be the only one who was hurt
Too many scratches inside my soul
The Angels couldn't recruit me to protect their threshold until I healed my wounds
But the heart resides and looks for shelter
Two actions at once
I'm a man trying to revert the dagger that I didn't see coming
This blockade of sadness is forthcoming
I must subsidize my qualms and dry my palms
I have too much soot on my hands
I must clean myself before I can be transparent again

THE BEAUTY SHINES THROUGH THIS DARK DECAY
NOW MY EYES ARE FULLY OPEN AND I'M OK
GAVE UP ON MYSELF, LIFE, AND EVERYTHING
DEATH WAS BETTER CAUSE I HAD NOTHING
THIS ANGEL CAME DOWN TO SHOW ME LOVE
GREATER THEN YOUR GOD COULD FROM ABOVE
SHE HEALED MY HEART AND HELPED ME LIVE AGAIN
I WILL ALWAYS BE THERE FOR THIS GIRL TILL THE END GODDESS THANK YOU FOR BEING A PART OF MY LIFE
**** BY THE DARKNESS BUT NOW I SEE THE LIGHT
NO MATTER WHAT WE WILL FIND AWAY
I WILL NOT JUST LET MY WHOLE WORLD SLIP AWAY

C2010 DUSTIN R. GOODMAN EDITED 2012