If happiness is key
Then what of the door?
A room with no exit
Just walls and a floor

It unlocks many things
Let life give you wings

If life is a blessing
Then why do I hurt?
A life not worth living
It’s but an insult

Cherish all that you feel
With time all will heal

You question your own life
Ignore the given
Play the fool and the child
Even the deaf listen

If time is a constant
Then why’d nights stand still?
Air hangs without motion
Breathe breaths that don’t fill

You’ll find peace in the dark
Listen to your heart

If hearts do have rhythm
Then why’s there no beat?
With eyes frozen open
I am dead asleep

*You questioned your own life
Ignored the given
Played the fool and the child
Even the deaf listen

These days...

Are you sitting alone in the quiet and cold
or surrounded by friends with your colors and smoke
Are you thinking of me as you fall back to sleep
Or grinningly praising the silence and peace

Is your love still the same
Are you glad that I'm gone
Do you miss me at all
Are you happy alone?

Yeah
These days...

I knew that I cared more
****, probably too much
but now I can't eat or find joy in the comfort
of knowing you're finally happy - you're free
But did it really take you not talking to me?

God, just tell me straight
Did you want me to stay? Please...
know I'm around
Are we better this way

...these days

You're still my everything
Yeah, that'll never change
But I need commitment and love
not these tears you're proud of
You say you're a man; are you happy again?
Well, ****.

I still see you and Zuri,
I still miss my lover,
but I need security the way you need me not to hover.
I want peace and partnership
You want casual relationships
We both can't win
and we're fighting again

These days...

I get it now
I really do see
Insouciance doesn't make you worse than me
and being so invested doesn't make me right.
We want different things -
is this worth the fight?

And one day I hope you will want to be mine
But you need some space
and I need some time
to forget your ambivalent shove toward shame
and the way that it hurt you to call out my name.

But I am still here
Your pain is still mine
and though I know love tends to fade over time
I swear that mine won't
One day you will see
One day you'll remember

And it will still be
...these days.

I hope someday I'll find a way out of here
A way that would show me how to conquer my fear
I put my head on the pillow to rest
But that's the only thing I do best
They said I suffer from a brain trauma
Leading to all this emotional drama
I sit right there staring at a wall
Trying to find a way, trying to find a door
Everyone keeps thinking I'm a villain
Driven by hate into my own prison
Their problem is,they never listen
Listen to my words, read what I write
Because that is what gets me through the night
A complete freeze, I'm not in ease
I think I'm sick by my own disease
Pulsing its way through my veins
There's this force, breaking all my chains
Now i know what my brain sustains
I have reached my absolute zero
From now on I'll be my own hero

Believe you me


The smell of antiseptic sticks to my skin

My sleeve and skin are pushed back
Letting the sinew of my bloodline breathe













I would not have lasted this night

I do not think I could have lasted last night









But I remember a blip and pixel
As another continent came alive on my screen

And my friend waved out to me behind her hipster scarf
Telling me it's okay to cry







Believe you me

That last night left a lasting impression
And I would not have made it through alive





If that friend had not been wakened by the ringing of her phone

Had she not proclaimed like it was fact


That I will be living at sixty and fifty and forty







Believe you me
I found something precious last night

- I regained my strength.

No one
Needs someone
To complete them.

You just
Need yourself
To complete you.

When we met I was bruised, I was bitter, and I felt broken beyond repair. You picked me up and right in the middle of healing my wounds, kissing my scars, and making me forgive myself for every mistake, you told me the truth. You were never meant to save me; you came here so I could save you.

-bcg (its funny, we both came for help, and we ended up breaking eachother all over again)

Her angelic voice
Assaults the air waves
A kiss’s Supplanted on her lips
Inconsequentially.

It’s in here
My happiness
Even if you can’t tell me it’s alright
And I’m asking you
Is it really alright for you?

I know your pain
Because it’s dying inside of you
That’s why you feel so bad
But living means you feel everything
And dying is letting it all go

It’s in here
Your happiness
I want to give it all to you
But you have to win the battle
Because your life must be your own

I know your pain
Because I see you crying
The flowers are bursting forth
Every thorn raking your soul
So they can let the sun inside

It’s in here
Our happiness
If we can just forget everything
Except to kiss each another when it rains
And hold each other until the skies clear

I know your pain
My heart finally learned to love
I no longer have to wait
It’s happening to me now
Because you taught me how to pray