I march along the pavement
Feeling incredibly lonely
Although I am not alone
I have my demons with me
Depression draped like a scarf
Resting over my eyes
I cannot see
Through it's myriad of lies
Anxiety whispering
Softly In my ear
You're not good enough
You don't belong here
My BDD stops me
At every mirror I pass by
I have to meet the standards
Of my demons perfectionist eye
I walk along shrouded
In my invisible darkness
You look at me and see a normal girl
You'd never guess I carry all this

your name is
forbidden in
my mouth
or in my heart
because when
i think about
you;

i'll cry a little more,
hurt a little stronger
love a little softer
because you no longer
make me feel sober

i'm drunk on the
memory of you

Break my bones;
cut my throat.
Pull me open,
learn the ropes.

Breath me in;
taste the fear.
Shank my skin;
stand and cheer.

Kick my head;
let me bleed.
Unbolt my veins;
enjoy the read.

Gouge my eyes;
punch my face.
Wrap me up
in your embrace.

I have kissed boys

Girls

People in between

But lately I have been kissing bottles

Their lips are colder than yours

But slowly I have realized that the pounding headache when I wake is less hurtful than the shattering in my chest

Yet as these toxins rush through my veins

I can't help but miss the tracing of your fingers along my skin

Miss the numbness of the world when you lie with me

But when I wake I remember that a headache is treated with an aspirin

While heartache

Well if you have a cure for Heartache let me know

and there we were
for one second rushing through millions, time felt like it had just...stopped
and it was just us
it was your lips on my neck
and your fingers pressed on my skin
it was our clothes strewn on the floor and my legs brushing up against you
it was the feeling of being desperately needed that filled the air around us
and engulfed our bodies

...you had me, then. you had all of me.

and
i think
some part of
me
figured
it would end
before
i had to deal
with any of
the hard
stuff

i will wait here
patiently
tell me we're wrong
but i will still hold on
i would wait
forever
just to feel your touch
don't slip away from me yet
my love

"Your arms feel like home." I said.
"Yours are heaven." He replied.

I can't sleep
Everytime I remember your words
They snap and recoil
And hurt me awake
Next time when someone
Promises me forever
I'll just smile
Look them in the eyes and ask
How long is forever to you.

As I lie here
With eyes closed softly
I think deeply of you
And I inhale stars
The scent of twinkling light
So fresh and alive
Sparkling gentle inside me
And I want to write this feeling
So tentatively
As it must be
Like writing words on bubbles
Delicate and precious
Begging them not to disappear
Like dreams in the morning

                                        By Phil Roberts