You tell me I'm one thing, But really you're just afraid that I'm something Undefinable. You believe everyone is one or the other, But whats the beauty in that? Maybe one day I'm 'They' The next I'm 'She' Then the day after I'm 'He' Don't suppress me for being Everything. Nothing. And Me.
Drawstring linen pants, Unisex from a women's catalogue. Dark green shirt, tomboy approved. Enough makeup to hide my faults. Pink heart earrings, and a silver cross in the 3rd hole. A silver cross, trans emblem and a silver heart engraved Laura, my true identity, together on a black bead chain. Silver Lesbian insignia ring with my wedding band on top. A black 1st finger ring etched with the Lord's prayer. 2 bracelets, one orange one turquoise to match a turquoise hat and dark glasses. A couple of mists of Acqua di Gioia. Women's turquoise/orange runners, And a Victoria's secret backpack.
I didn't really think about the details until evening, All I knew is I felt comfortable today. I even went to Kohl's department store alone and browsed, and felt a confidence I'd rarely felt in the past.
Is this how some people feel every day I wonder? I was so grateful for just today, just one day. Today I was me
I'm tired. I'm tired of it taking more mental energy and self confidence for us to go out in public, than it does most people. I don't blame a person, or religion, its much more than that. I blame society in general, its peer pressure, It's structure designed to keep everyone in small boxes, all thinking the same. I blame manufacturer's for making every item we buy gendered male or female, Just to sell more and make more money. I blame the media for its lies and ignorance when reporting about us.. And I blame us is some ways for allowing it. I blame myself for not doing more, but I'm just too tired of fighting, struggling and having to do it all again tomorrow. I'm Transgender.. And I get tired.