Things between us have changed.
Pretending only presents the underlying problem.
We spend our time in seperate rooms.
The television on two seperate channels.
Still unable to find what we're looking for.
Demanding peace unwilling to press for change.
The thing's we said we'd never do.
Complete faith that we'd never walk pass each other.
So much as a single word.
Strangers in wait that it will get better.
If it isn't you, I can't go on.
Good or bad.
Being forced to pretend that everything is alright.
Another show airs.
Demanding attention else where.
I am trying,
But can't keep flipping past the infomercials without being tempted.
Searching for a happy ending

In a way this sort of feels like school.
One moment we're curiously writing and passing notes to each other.
The next we're caught and sent off to detention.
I never knew which box you checked.
Yes.
No.
Maybe kinda sort of.

There's a lesson to be learned from all of this.
Which one I am really not sure.
I wasn't paying attention.
Instead of studying.
Here I am writing another note.
It never really occurred to me.
That while the teacher is teaching.
Filling us with what passes the time.
Life happens behind his back.

The context of how competitive everything is.
In retrospect.
What did you get for number 2.
A.
B.
Or C

Which answer dictates how fast he turns around.
One day soon we'll both know

She told me that she never had real spaghetti before.
Of course she's had spaghetti before but not in the sense that made it worthwhile.
When I asked why she replied that it didn't feel real.
That in a sense it was pasta.
She always broke the noodles when she made it.
She developed a fear that everything would boil over and catch fire.
That part of the noodles would be too crunchy.
All of it would never fit in the ***.
Her mother always broke the noodles so it just became habit.
In the same breath.
She told me at least once,
That she'd like to twirl the noodles around the fork.
The complete taste and feel of what makes it spaghetti.
The cheese blending into the sauce.
The big ball of noodles just wrapping around the fork waiting to be bit.
When I asked about the meatballs she laughed,
She was vegetarian

We left the safety of port.
Rising and falling
wave after wave.
The wind stung our face.
Abroad tensions rose.
Never seeing water the way we've seen.
Tossing and turning.
The ship slicing the strong current.
Together we hauled toward the anchor.
Spotting the largest wave we'd ever seen.
Hurling towards us with everything she had.
We set sail without guide.
This perhaps the worse storm yet.
We braced for impact.
Not prepared for what accompanied.
The boom crashed against the deck.
Our linen tossed everywhere.
We panicked,
steering best we could to no avail.
We succumbed to her fury.
Ready to face what may.
Our true destination found.
Seeking the sun after devastation

Through many misadventures.
It's you I seek.
Climbing the many stairs that lead me to my goal.
It's never enough.
Through the laterals of vault jumps.
Through the brick and mortar of red paths.
I still see them when I close my eyes.
No matter how terrified I am.
I still make that jump for you.
Finding all the traces you've been.
The worn soles of the many miles I've traveled.
My self put to the side.
 I find the many seeds that we've planted.
Once beautiful, now overgrown to the point that they no longer fit in regular pots.
Without you there's no reason to toil around anymore.
The ghosts of who we use to be wait behind every corner.
Confronting me everytime I turn my back.
Still it's you that I seek.
Finding my own personal hell.
Fire breathing dragon included.
I've tried to hide myself behind my work to no avail.
It follows me everywhere I go.
The inter-workings of my mind.
I've found myself hanging on a string.
Time after time.
Bridges that I've crossed getting from point A to B.
The growth that's essential to make it to the next stage.
The sound of coins no longer entices.
Facing my fears in the hope of reaching you again.
Finding a better me.
The final ax to the head of the fire breathing dragon that guards you closely.
In the end to find that this closet I keep my fears.
Has turned to another castle.
With another dragon.

And like a bird
She flies away.
She sings her song in ultimate joy.
Her heart flutters.
Singing what comes to mind.
Soon as she is approached.
She flies away.
The wind beneath her arms.
She goes higher and higher.
Stopping in mid air,
Her arms tired & sore.
The life she deserves isn't far.
Gliding towards the horizon.
Soon as she finds peace.
It is easily disturbed.
Looking around to find the best place.
Seeking shelter she flies further.
Appearances aren't at all what they seem.
For this she is labeled and taken for granted.
Curiously placing one foot in front of the other.
Veering the opposite direction.
Her heart falling faster and faster.
They don't know her worth.
She flies higher and higher

I needed this so much.
A little alone time.
Designer jeans.
T-shirts printed with out the blue sayings.
A moment to ourselves home alone.
Wasting time just you & I.
Causally stretched across each other on the couch.
Commercials filled with Wal-mart families.
Insurance companies. Lawsuit claims.
Your sugar fills the space between shows.
Your head leaned back on my chest.

Neck twisted in a kiss.
The TV more so watching us.
The wait of working all week for this moment of relaxation.

The anticipation of butterflies, late night texts. 
The vintage shows we grew up watching, still our favorite.
I really missed you.
Your shoulder my favorite pillow.
The extended twenty-first question of our 21 Questions.
Sitting here with you.
Soon to fall asleep with you in my arms.
To wake up and do the same exact same thing.

To let you know that I made it home safe